last year Ali Truitt was on vacation snorkeling when a shark attacked her and her friend Ally was left without part of one of her legs but that didn't stop Ally from doing what she loves the former Yale University swimmer will be competing for Team USA in this year's paralympic games in Paris this is disrupted I'm kalila Brown Dean this hour We're preparing for the 202 for Olympic and paralympic games later in the show we'll hear from a breaker for Team USA the summer marks the debut of breaking as an Olympic sport breaking is often called break dancing in the media we'll also learn about some of the geopolitics surrounding this year's Olympics including the impact of Russia's war in Ukraine but first Ali Truitt is a paralympic swimmer from Connecticut Ally welcome to disrupted thank you for having me I'm excited you know we're excited to talk with you because it takes so much focus and strength to get to the level of being a paralympic athlete but before we talk about this Summer's games I'm curious what Drew you to swimming I actually started swimming at a really young age I have three brothers and we all within three years of age and so my mom threw us in swim lessons really young just for water safety and I immediately fell in love with the water I love that it was this place I could be with my friends and also simultaneously push myself physically and emotionally so you clearly are at home in the water I wonder what it feels like when you're swimming when you're in the space where you feel so connected and at the same time you're competing what does swimming feel like for you yeah swimming feels like a lot for me and especially in this past year I've worked to get back to that place of feeling peaceful and happy in the water post shark attack um but for me I love the freedom I feel in the water and I love that it's this place where my mind is just focused on the present of where I am and kind of forgets about everything else going on around me and you're right it is this really cool switch of when it's time to compete you forget about you know the freedom and the peace in the water instead focus on pushing yourself as much as you can and using it as a vehicle to help you show yourself what you're capable of you've used the words freedom and peace several times in talking about being in the water and what swimming means to you you also mentioned that just a year ago that sense of Peace was really disrupted by this attack share with our listeners that experience and how you were able to push through to find peace and comfort in the water again yes so uh just over a year ago I was snorkling with one of my best friends um on vacation and a shark came up out of nowhere and started attacking us and we fought back but It ultimately bit my foot and part of my leg off during the attack and we screamed for help but no help came and so we made the Split Second decision to swim for our lives roughly 75 yards in the open ocean water um me bleeding profusely still and uh you know both of us knowing a shark was still circling to get back to the boat to save ourselves and so returning to the water after that I was really fearful uh the last time I had heard the sound of water at that point you know I was swimming for my life and so I was scared to get back in but for me I felt like I've lost a lot through the attack and some of what I've lost I'm never going to get back you know I'm never getting my foot back so the things that I could fight to get back I decided I was going to fight to get back and so I worked to get back in the water started with my backyard pool um and I'm really lucky my mom's a therapist so she helped so much with just some of those mental fears I was having getting back in and experiencing flashbacks to the attack um and from there it sort of expanded I got back into training with my coach who's coached me since I was 12 years old and you know it was definitely very up and down there were those days where I didn't have that peace and that Comfort but I knew that it was Within Reach and the more I showed myself I could the more I found that peace and comfort again the other thing it sounds like Ally you reclaimed your power that power to say yes this tragic thing happened but I'm going to try even if it has fits and starts and there are challenges and as I'm listening to you talk about that challenge of getting back into the water the memories that it brought up I'm also reminded that there's so many conversations happening right now about mental health and well-being for athletes and the ways in which we as Spectators sometimes create unrealistic expectations or pressures that don't recognize people as people how important has that been for you during your healing journey to be able to say maybe I'm not okay today but I deserve to feel and deal the way that I need to Yes uh I love the way you just phrased that because it's true I've really learned that through this journey um you know the power of vulnerability and I think in sport it's something that's continuing to be focused on more and definitely has room for improvement to be focused on more but as a lifelong athlete I grew up um in sport not feeling like being vulnerable was necessarily the natural option we're taught to push through when we feel sore and tired and so um you know this year has definitely been a big learning year for me in terms of learning how to balance giving myself Grace on those hard days with also pushing myself on the days that I'm capable of of doing so and I actually call it a Grace and gratitude mindset and so I focus a lot on all that I do have and what I'm grateful for you know physically in my own body and also in terms of all of the support I have around me and I also have Grace for myself on those hard days where you know it might just feel like too much or I need a break and again I'm also really lucky because my coach is actually in school to become a therapist as well and so he is kind of that Perfect Blend of you know helping me recognize the days that we need to hit the pause button and kind of sit and feel the feels and then pushing me on the days that that's where we're at and I'm capable of of going your journey in terms of of rebounding from this attack been a little over a year and you are already set to compete in the paralympic games how did you make the decision or or when did you make the decision I'm going to keep competing and this is the way that I'm going to do it um yes it's definitely a quick turnaround and I knew that trying to make the team was you know p rabbit out of a hat a little bit and I'm really really proud of myself for how far I've come in a year I truthfully you know it initially started like I sat in my backyard pool I wanted to reclaim my love of the water and that was important to me and from there I was actually missing cardio a lot uh I think for me exercise and sports feel like a really tangible way to help us all feel stronger again and so I got back into the pool because at that point you know I was still getting fit for a prosthetic and recovering um in terms of healing in my leg and so I couldn't run I couldn't walk um or was still learning to do all that again and the pool was a space for me that I didn't need my leg and so I called my coach who's coached me since I was 12 years old Jamie Barone and he came to the pool and we started doing workouts just to make me feel strong and happy and you know get some exercise in and I think that was sort of where it started kind of the idea started permeating for me of what if what if I could do this what if in a year I could see myself at the par Olympics in Paris and um I feel like a lot of times me personally but generally maybe a lot of people go with what if and then it's a fear or a negative thing and it was one of the first times for me where I had a what if that was a really positive and exciting ending and so that landed me about three and a half months out from the shark attack and the amputation at my first paralympic meet um I remember I showed up and I didn't even know how to get on the blocks on one leg I had been back training for like a few days and I gave myself until Nationals in December which was 6 months out from the amputation and the attack to make my decision and I remember just feeling so welcomed into the community uh on deck and so just in awe of what these athletes are able to do and I felt like that was a place that I wanted to be where um you know I was able to focus on what I still could do instead of what I couldn't I imagine that that mindset carries you through the challenging moments but also allows you to embrace the beauty of what you are said to do and that is to compete in the paralympic games what does this moment mean for you what what does it feel like for you as you think about what you are embarking on now oh my gosh competing in the Paro Olympic Games means the world to me having been a lifelong athlete you know we all dream of achieving that next higher level of competition since we're kids and so to be able to represent the United States at the par Olympics is a dream come true for me and really a culmination of many many years of hard work in and out of the pool since I was a young child but I think even more than that I am so excited and just really can't wait to wear the American flag on my cap in races in Paris wearing the American flag on my head in races you know to me stands as a thank you to the everyday American Heroes all around me who have worked so hard this year to save me and are helping me rebuild my life you know my family my friends my doctors nurses the first responder my physical therapists my prosthetists my coach Jamie Barone you know my list goes on but to me the flag on my cap is a thank you to all of them and a reminder that our country is made up of people like them who is the alley truit beyond the water beyond the pool what are the things that bring you Joy in life uh I definitely love spending time with my friends and my family and I think through this year but always I've been just so grateful for the support I have around me and so in my free time I love just being around my friends and laughing and my family makes me laugh so hard and something I've actually um gotten really into I started a baking business in my recovery and for me baking you know one is very therapeutic because like swimming it's the only thing I think about when I'm in the kitchen I don't have to think about my doctor's appointments or different things that are weighing on me um but to early on served as a way for me to show myself that even when I was feeling down or feeling low I had the power to make other people happy and it seems a little silly through you know giving someone a cookie but it was the message for me to keep going um and so I found so much joy in the kitchen and my business TR it streets and I are having a blast just experimenting on different cakes and brownies and cookies you were born and raised here in Connecticut how will being a part of History representing the state of Connecticut in addition to the US how does Connecticut play into your journey well I am so proud to be representing Connecticut um Connecticut is a sports loving State you know we have the Yukon husky men and women to be amazed by year after year we have Yale Athletics I have to shout out of course but we love sports here and so growing up with Connecticut sport Sports definitely just shaped my love of Athletics um and growing up on the Long Island Sound also shaped my love of swimming and of Nature and I think that was just a gift that made me so grateful for my Sport and for how beautiful Connecticut is we are so proud that you will be representing the state of Connecticut and representing the United States and I know Ally that there will be many people who will be watching you compete who will be cheering you on and I'm thinking of the young people who are dealing with all sorts of challenges in their own lives and sometimes may need a reminder that progress is possible even if it takes longer than you expect what would your message be to young people as they are watching the games and thinking about your own path what's that message um you know I'm still learning myself in this first year of recovery but I think probably three things I've learned that could be helpful to young people uh I'd say first don't count your yourself out no matter what you're going through you're stronger than you think and you know I've listened to David goggin's talk about this idea is this 40% rule where he says that you know we're all only typically operating at 40% of our capacity and I heard that before the shark attack and at that point I truthfully thought maybe it was a little hyped up but now life with a prosthetic has taught me what using more than 40% of my capabilities look like you know life with a prosthetic is hard and so hard on a daily basis basis um and so I think learning that I have so much more to use and give within me has been really empowering and my second learning uh that's been really helpful for me is I would say find a way to make meaning of whatever hardship or tough time you're going through it's not easy but it really helps so much if you can allow the goal of of making meaning to be your guidepost it will inform your thoughts your feelings your actions your decisions and I think it'll ultimately point you in the direction of turning trauma or tough times into hope and that's really what helps you get through nightmares and so you know for me becoming an Ute at 23 years old was a really hard pill to swallow to say the least um but trying to make meaning out of it and showing myself I'm stronger than I thought by making the paral Olympics in just a year and by fighting to get my life back by becoming an advocate and educating others about you know the community's needs and strengths and successes and by starting a foundation stronger than you think Inc that will aim to help people who can't afford Prosthetics and promote water safety awareness and support activities involving athletes within impairment it makes the whole thing less of a nightmare for me um and I would say lastly I've learned this past year to really lean on friends and family my community has been such a source of strength for me and I'm someone who likes to typically keep my problem problems to myself because I aim to spread you know light and happiness and joy and so it was a really tall order for me to let people in to my low days and my tears but I just sit here today so glad that I did because my community made all the difference in my recovery and so one of my biggest learnings has been be as vulnerable as you can let people help lift you back up they're there they want to help um let them Ellie we appreciate all the many ways that you are moving through pain to power and that you are encouraging and empowering others to pursue their purpose and we can't wait to see you in competition Ali truid is a Connecticut native and will be competing as a swimmer in the Paris 2024 summer par Olympic games thank you so much Ally thank you coming up we'll learn about the connection between the Olympics and geopolitics and later we'll meet one of the women competing in the first ever Olympic breaking competition this is disrupted we'll be right back welcome back to disrupted I'm Kila Brown Dean more than 200 countries or regions will be competing in the Olympics this year but Russia and bellarus were barred from sending teams because of the ongoing war in Ukraine some athletes from those countries will be participating but but is quote individual neutral athletes for more on that and other geopolitical issues surrounding this year's Olympics we're joined Now by Les Carpenter he's Olympics writer for the Washington Post Les welcome to disrupted well thank you for having me one of the things when we think about the Olympics is this opportunity to bring the world together where we just focus on Sport and the athletes and as you all know it's never just been about the sport it's never just been about athletes and particularly now when we see so much Global unrest a lot of people are thinking about the Olympics and Russia and its invasion of Ukraine and some of the consequences of that what does that war mean for who is eligible to compete in the Olympics this year yeah it's one of those many tricky things that the Olympics uh winds itself around uh every time we have a games and plus iCal things come up uh in this particular case Russians and B Russian bellerians will be allowed to compete but only under the provision that they are not supporting the war that they have not actively put things on social media saying they support the war and that they are not somehow part of that country's military uh and even then their candidacy if you want to call it that their their case is taken up by a panel of three people the ioc has picked to go through every single one of these possibilities and I think the interesting thing about it and this is a very Olympic thing one of those people is Pagel the Hall of Fame basketball player used to play for the Lakers and obviously the Star from Spain so they've gone through and I think the latest I saw was 34 Russians have been invited and I want to say about 20 21 belarusians they have not all accepted uh you'll some tennis players you know but it's not going to be a very large contingent they will not be allowed to have Russia or ban colors they have this green flag that is very generic and Bland and that's what they will compete under and if they win a medal there will be no Anthem played for them it'll be as if they are just some odd entity that has shown up at the Olympics with no affiliation anywhere I have a ton of questions about this because it seems straightforward that here's a committee that decides have you supported have you actively Advanced this cause but what does it mean to support the war or support The Invasion what is this threepers committee exactly looking for what's the metric that Paul Gasol is like yes you not you help me out Les what are they looking at well you've just touched on what the whole Olympic world is about one big question of well what is the murky answer to this um I think it seems that they've done a pretty good job for one thing they have gone to Ukraine and asked who would you approve who would you not give us reasons to say we can or cannot accept this person so that helps a little bit uh I think they do a lot of scaring of social media there are a lot of Russians who train in US certainly tennis players and and swimmers and whatnot some of them are probably easier to to kind of study and and realize that they're living a very Western life and probably are incredibly detached from this uh but it's murky I and I suspect that somebody will show up and there will be an enormous question or something will be dug up out of their past and we'll be asking this very question well what did this panel do that that's the way it always works you know the other piece of it is is what did this panel do in this case of Russian and valarian athletes but maybe people are saying well this isn't the only country that is engaged in war or engaged in Conflict how does the ioc say we are going to focus on Russia but not focus on perhaps what's happening in Kenya or what's happening with Israel how does the ioc here's say here's the country that we're focusing on at this point well that's a fantastic question uh because I I I could even bring it to the United States uh with the invasions of Iraq and Afghanistan I mean Iraq's Invasion while supported by much of the world and I'm sure that that made it easier to for everyone to accept is the fact is still you were trying to do a regime change hostile uh which is exactly what Russia has tried to do here uh I I think in a lot of cases it becomes a public relations thing I think in some cases it becomes what is palatable in the Western World in which the ioc lives uh you mentioned Kenya this is kind of invisible to a lot of people um there's wars in the Americas that are invisible to a lot of people in Western world this is a big one right in the middle of Europe where the IFC is based where so much of the power of the Olympics has come from traditionally from the very beginning of the modern games in the in the late 1800s yeah I I it's it's very subjective Les would it be cynical for me to say some of this feels like posturing of wanting to be on a particular side in This Global understanding or is it really about protecting the Integrity of the sport and the games well it's both and that leads to bigger questions as well I again I think the other issue at play here with Ukraine is that for the last what 38 years 35 years we've had a free Europe uh and this is the first sort of incursion against that uh and then Russia itself has been an enormous thorn in the side of the ioc now for a decade uh it it isn't just Ukraine if we go back to 2014 when Russia hosted the most expensive Olympics ever we can get into kind of talking about the costs and and certainly regimes uh that are totalitarian and how they can outspend other regimes or other countries the most expensive Olympics in 20 in 2014 also was the Olympics of the state sponsored doping Scandal uh where Russia was literally running fake tests through its own doping lab in its own Olympics and so you have that that's never properly been dispensed of Russia is still technically under suspension from the world anti-doping Agency for its actions in 2014 it has not fully complied with all the uh you know with all the with all the requirements of that and you've had several Olympics in an in a row now where Russia has done something or has not technically been a full part of the Olympics you also look at the fact that there's this document called the Olympic truth which doesn't have a whole lot of power but it is a document that where the world's countries kind of promise not to attack another During the period right before the Olympics to the end of the par Olympics Russia's three main attacks of other countries have all come in the middle of the Olympic TRS if you go back to 2008 this is under Putin I mean if you go back to 2008 in Georgia if you go back to that was during the beij right before the Beijing Olympics the first Beijing Olympics 2014 was pra and uh in the last uh uh Beijing Olympics in 2022 at the very end of the Olympic Games before the par Olympics was uh was Ukraine so Russia has this long history of not playing by the rules so to speak or intentionally subverting them to advance their interest so it becomes bigger than just the Olympics I'm curious however less are there other historical precedents where you point to to say this sort of geopolitical challenge appears in the Olympics or is Russia really an outlier when we think about history it's not totally an outlier but there are not a lot in recent years uh South Africa famously could not compete under apartheid uh for a few years uh there have been others in the past uh that have kind of been lost to time and then the Olympics uh let's see there are five total Olympics between winter and summer games that were cancelled uh during World War I and World War II uh so there have been several uh where war or some kind of a political situation A government situation a policy has forced the country out but what's going on now is a little uh unique the ioc is trying very hard to skate around Russia here to not completely anger Putin but at the same time well let's see you know we we don't want Russians here nobody wants Russians here how do we do this so this one is not very absolute by the time this interview airs the UK will have elected a new prime minister by this time France will have had the second or of two rounds of an election and there's really the potential for there to be some major political changes and shift happening in France what impact do you think that will have as we think about the Olympics and the par Olympics in Paris I've been thinking about that especially the the the situation in France and uh I think on a surface it will be fine I don't I think the people running it are not political they are and they're very they seem to be very efficient and very good this this group running to Paris Olympics I assume it will chug along just fine Paris is of course a city of protest France is a country of protest you have a socialist mayor and obviously a en roaching bar right in uh in the areas outside of the city or outside of the whole Paris region uh so you could have some tension but I think France lives under tension I think Paris lives under tension I don't know that that will be as big a deal there are some interesting things though where the Olympics comes back in play so in 2030 there will be another Olympics in France and the ioc did this kind of we can talk about this later as to how the ioc picks cities uh but it it picked the south of France to host the Winter Games in 2030 there is a document that needs to be signed before the ioc meeting that will be right before this Olympics that will be the Olympics where the ioc's members will officially approve the uh the south of France there's two documents one that will say yes France will guarantee being able to pay the Olympics if something should fall apart with the organizing committee the second is two regions there have to agree to share government you know control of the Olympics they're very very basic things they have not been signed because they don't know the results of this election the ioc will tell you this is nothing it's just procedural we just have to know who the next uh you know prime minister will be blah blah blah blah blah but it's sitting there unsigned right now and I think this is the kind of tension that will sort of lur over the Olympics with all that's going on in Europe right now little things like this which seem like nothing will start to become bigger and bigger and bigger things there's a strong contingent of people who have been very critical of the ioc whether it's the cities that it chooses to host in Olympics whether it is the cost of hosting and some of the displacement that happens to people who are in a city when it is trying to uh clean up its image for the world stage how does that play into given the instability that we're seeing across Europe but particularly in France how do those sorts of critiques play into the thing that you're mentioning here of it sounds very basic but we haven't yet gotten a signed agreement there are there is minimal building with this Olympics which is cost saving and and what the I is trying to do and what everyone's trying to do the building that is being done is not being done in the city but in the suburbs and these are suburbs that Paris is kind of a place where your surrounding suburbs are loaded with a lot of immigrants a lot of people without a great deal of money your underserved communities are your communities just outside of Paris and there's a lot of talk about they're building This Magnificent athletes Village that will be turned into Apartments I've actually gone and looked at it and looked at the the brochures for the apartments they look fantastic it's going to have all these ironically a big National Police will be headquartered there as well um but that's an area where people live and people have been displaced and that's an area that will now become far more expensive is that attainable for some people in in in France I feel that is some of the tension that is boiling around Paris you certainly saw it last year with the uh with the with the unrest after the police killing of a young man I feel like some of the anger that Spilled Out of that had to have come from this inequity of the wealthy Paris and the not wealthy suburbs that now are being quote unquote gentrified I want to make sure we talk about China here as well right you can't talk about the Olympics you can't talk about geopolitical challenges without thinking about China we heard earlier this year that some of China's top swimmers tested positive for baned substances in the past how do you think that Scandal and many of the global concerns about China how do you see that playing out in these Olympic Games yeah I've wondered a lot about how the the doping Scandal will play out in these games it will play out in swimming uh because several of those swimmers will will be back at this games again and they'll be competing against uh other swimmers who have tested clean throughout their careers and will say well gosh how come we've gone through these great efforts to make sure we're clean and here's this very odd strange thing and and I'll and I'll just in a very brief you know briefly encapsulate it but a group of Chinese swimmers a large group I think it was 23 right before the Tokyo Olympics tested positive for the substance that's become very popular it's a heart medication it's a very random heart medication in Russia that is used for patients who are elderly and have heart issues uh but suddenly is showing up in a lot of Russian athletes the most famously the figure skater Camila veva it is also showing up in Chinese athletes and 23 of them tested positive for this one substance and the explanation that the Chinese anti-doping authorities gave was well it was in this hotel where they all were staying for this swim meet and it somehow got through the ventilation system I again these are pills I don't know how pills get chopped up and spread to the ventilation system but you know I I you know it's one of those things that the that that can't the agency's overseeing it can't properly investigate it and it's become a scandal this way um I I don't know if that will carry over as much we'll certainly talk about it when the swimming is involved I think the bigger issue of China is what are China's Ambitions through Sports uh how has China used the Olympics for those Ambitions and the problem that has always been for the Olympics is that Russia and China can outspend everybody else I I I mean the two most expensive Olympics ever were the 2008 uh games in Beijing and and a 2014 games in in Sochi I mean it was 50 million in in Sochi and and 44 million in Beijing and no Olympics even approaches that I think Paris will be about 10 million or billion um sorry billion and that is that is something that's very hard for Western societies to try to match and so it's it's a tricky dance and you take a Russia you take a China they use sport to promote their governments they use sport to promote their regimes uh you're seeing this now with India On The Rise you're going to see Saudi Arabia try to get into the Olympics you're going to start seeing more places like that try and that will be the interesting tension for the ioc can it continue to keep Olympics in places where there are quote unquote democracies as opposed to trying to put Olympics in places with totalitarian regimes I for the next 10 years we don't have to worry about it but I think it it could creep up here's my last question to you Les it's something that I've been thinking about quite a bit and I know that you are as well given where you are located this is an election year in the United States there's lots of angst about it lots of uncertainty is there any significance for the United States in its election cycle as we think about the Olympic Games it's interesting you say that because I've been thinking a lot about it and I've been thinking a lot about it because I've thought a lot about 1984 which was the uh Los Angeles Olympics and if you remember the Eastern block the Soviet Union and and East Germany led a boycott of those games that then became an all- American Games us just won medal after medal after medal after medal that was the Ronald Reagan reelection year and he probably would have won reelection anyway but I think all that patriotic spill over further propelled him into office I don't necessarily see that kind of spill over out of this Olympics into this election unless something external ERS it unless Russia invades France I mean I I I I'm being Preposterous here but I'm just saying that I think you need something significant that would be out of the ordinary that we wouldn't even begin to possibly imagine for that to affect the election I don't I don't see it being an impact uh I always think it's interesting that you go one party's convention the Olympics immediately after the Olympics is the other parties's convention it usually is Republican Olympics Democrat and it is this year uh I I think whatever happens to democratic convention will be unrelated I think I think there'll be enough excitement there without the Olympics to add to it Les Carpenter is Olympics writer for the Washington Post Les thank you for joining us and we look forward to reading everything you're going to write about this Olympics well thank you I I do think it'll be an interesting Olympics and I I do think it will be one worth watching and the certainly the vistas of Paris will Aid the uh I I think I think it will really be beautiful on television coming up Team USA breaker Logan edra opens up about her mental health Journey this is disrupted stay with [Music] us welcome back to disrupted I'm Kila Brown Dean today we're talking about this Summer's Olympic and paralympic games this year's Olympics will feature a new sport called breaking breaking is a style of movement that developed out of hip-hop culture in the Bronx it can include a range of moves from spinning on the floor to elaborate footwork and freezes you've probably heard the sport being called break dancing but that term was popularized by the media not by the people who comprise the breaking scene so there's a debate over the use of break dancing with some considering the term derogatory for the Olympics the breaking competition will work like this a DJ will choose the music so Breakers don't know what they will dance to beforehand the breakers will then compete in one-on-one battles with the winner of each battle decided by a panel of Judges Logan edra also known as Logistics is one of the four Breakers representing Team USA Logan's breaking Journey started after her dad tricked her into going to a hip-hop dance class as Logan to tell me more about that experience so I'll go back to when I started dancing uh I was doing Jazz ballet uh at studio and it got expensive so um fortunately my dad brought me to a a local Church uh I got a shout out New Hope Church T Vista and um they offered art classes like music dance uh I I was doing that for a while and then my dad asked me if I wanted to try hip-hop dance and I said no because I was too scared and shy and timid and um I was going to my art class and it ended up being uh the hip-hop dance class that he was talking about and I told him like I didn't want to try this but he was like just just try it if you don't like you don't got to continue but if you do then you can just keep going and I tried it and I just fell in love instantly like it was literally one of the most amazing experiences I've had and I just remember that moment so clearly because it I fell in love like I fell in love with dance at like seven so after that I progressed really fast because I was just enjoying it so much and then I um I went to culture shop Dance Center because they had more uh advaned training and they had this breaking class and I remember seeing these kids just spitting on their heads and like trying some crazy moves and like doing some like weird dangerous stuff and and I told my parents like I want to try that and it just intrigued me so I got into it and then there was another class that was also breaking for kids and at the same studio and it was taught by a female and her name is valow and when I saw her um teaching his class when I saw her breaking I it just changed my reality because I didn't I thought it was a guy thing I remember telling my my my dad like Oh I thought this was a guy thing and then I saw her um teaching that class and it was just it made me want to do it even more what have you learned about yourself in this journey of competitive breaking excelling at this amazing Sport and activity what has it taught you about Logan excelling and breaking has taught me how strong I am um when I'm in a cipher like majority of the time it's people all different kinds of people from different backgrounds and it's a very uh aggressive almost angry energy because that's what this dance is for it's it's a little bit of a angry dance not in a negative way but to like let it out so when I'm in the cipher um I just remember so many times being so scared to to get in Cipher but there was something that was keeping me there that was just like inviting but also intimidating at the same time so it taught me a lot about how strong I am and also taught me a lot about what I'm capable of and and also the role that I have in this life in this world because it's not I think um as women and I'm sure you know we're in a time where it's like a lot of woman empowerment and some of it's performative you know I'm not going to lie like but for me it's like like to if I look at it from like the big picture which is very difficult to do when you're in the forest but like to look at it from the outside's point of view then it makes me less surprised uh if I'm making an impact on younger females and younger girls because uh for example I just went to my my my um I call them family but my team ring May they're my crew we threw a kids jam the other day and I could just see all these kids and and the impact I made on them and it's it's a little bit um it just feels a little bit crazy but it I just I can see the impact that I'm making on them so it's just like I know I'm doing something right if if if there are people that are able to just cultivate more light within themselves by seeing what I'm doing not even for my validation but for them to see Yo I can do that too like and and it's such a it's it's like a a selfless feeling like I don't know how explain it so breing taught me that as you describe that there was this lightness in your voice this energy that we could hear and I can see it on your face this connection of too often in our society I think young girls and young women are told not to be emotional are told not to express passion or anger and it's misdirected and to have a space of of competition where you can be yourself and also step outside of yourself for a moment to connect with your crew to connect with the cipher to connect with your own energy and to be able to live in that moment there is this light that also gives other people the authority to pursue it in their way how do you manage that the energy of that with the notion that in fact you are competing at the same time as you're expressing how do you navigate those two things you know that's that's a question that I ask myself every single day I'm like how am I doing this but I also I think it's also because I know why I'm doing it um I I'm am so in touch with my why that it drives me to continue with the work and I love this Dent so much that I can I I was going to say I could do it in my sleep but I do do it in my sleep I'm in my dreams um so it's it's it's hard to explain because I think majority of of I'm assuming that majority of the world may not be in touch with um this within them this power that they have within them like everyone has this power to change the world to make positive change and then the awareness I think it just comes from being as present as I can in every interaction that I have like I'm such an empath that I I absorb people's energies and I I think like I was so angry that I would feel everyone's emotions and feel and I've dealt with narcissistic abuse I've dealt with these things so maybe it's it's shaped my personality from a young age till now but I decided to look at it as a gift instead of turning off the switch because I think it's very powerful I think we can use our traumas as uh to heal from that to become stronger and and um it gives us gifts that we can offer to the world so um going back to I was talking about oh yeah absorbing people's energies um I've a I've been blessed to um have a curiosity for why I feel certain emotions and I know everyone like feels these emotions but I think uh it takes a certain type of person to go deeper into that and do like the self-work and and um it is scary to talk about it's very scary to talk about because I don't know how people are um how people receive this you will be making history for the first time that breaking is a part of the Olympic Games you will be competing with Team USA is one of the four Breakers you don't know this about me but many many years ago I thought I wanted to be in breaking and had this little crew in my neighbor neighborhood and I was absolutely awful like awful at it but it was this beautiful thing to come together so now that I can look on my television and see you competing is that reminder of what's possible but I have to ask you this question what should I be looking for as we are watching you and other Breakers competing and making history what should the audience be looking for as they are watching this like what does it what does a competition look like at this level thank you for sharing that and I'm sure you weren't as bad as you're saying that you were because it's a dance um but I I going back to the question I think just people just need to enjoy what they're watching I think uh with traditional Sports um there's it's like Technical and like breaking is technical too but we're a hybrid like we're this very different breed of of of athletes because we're we're artists as well so um we yeah I I would say people they don't got to expect anything they don't got to look for anything they just got to sit back relax and enjoy the show because it's like that's literally that's how easy easily digestible it is and that's why I think breaking is going to do so well because we don't got to overe explain ourselves in terms of the physical form of what we do the proof is in what what what we're doing and what we're sharing with our bodies and with our dance um so that's simply that just for the for the audience and the people out there that are hopefully watch Breaking if you're not I think that's a big mistake you got to come and watch Breaking because it's going to be the best it's going to be the most the most I'm just being biased because I love breaking so much I love the way that you say you are an athlete and you are an artist my question to you Logan is is what does this moment mean for you this moment to do this thing that you love that you excel at on an international stage what is this moment for you yeah this moment is actually for my dad this moment is for my family this moment is for uh anyone that loves me that couldn't do couldn't do this you know and it's it's actually very sad when I if I think if I think about at least right now in this time of my life it just I I know that my family and generations before me would have loved to to do something like this at this level at this capacity I think about the people in the Philippines like from like because my grandparents were the ones who moved to the US just I think about I really think about them I have this picture of my dad that he didn't even send it to me my dad my my grandma sent it to me his mom sent it to me and I'm I'm grateful we still we have a connection and it's a picture of him uh in a b boy stance with like a graffiti tagged up shirt and like a hat and like these sunglasses and it there was a moment and I where I realized I I just felt like I I'm doing this for you like I don't know like I just felt this like this feeling of like it was definitely gratitude and it was love and so that's what it means to me this is just it's for the culture it's for my family it is for myself but it's for for the message of Love Light truth and and God ultimately well Logan I hope you know that you just by being yourself are empowering others you are inspiring others and we are looking forward to cheering for you very soon Logan edra also known as Logistics will be one of four Breakers competing for team USA in the 2024 Paris Olympics Logan thank you so much for being with us today thank you so much disrupted is produced by Kevin Chang Barnum Wayne Edwards Robin Doan Aken Meg Dalton and Katie tarski you can listen to all the previous episodes of disrupted by finding us wherever you get your podcast I'm Kila Brown Dean thanks for listening all