I'd like to report a crime
that hasn't happened yet. Have you seen the movie
"Back to the Future"? Basically, I'm living
that movie right now, which is how I know
there's gonna be a murder tonight. Hate time-travel movies.
They never make any sense. Happy Halloween. How 'bout we all stay in
and hand out Halloween candy? No, Mom. You know how hard
this time of the year is for us. Your friends were murdered 35 years ago. It's not 1987 anymore. Stay safe, honey.
I love you! What the fuck? Excuse me.
What year is it? 1987. -Oh, my god.
-I know. The 80s are almost over,
and I haven't even tried coke yet. They don't know. Oh, my god.
Mom. Fuck off and die. Jesus, Mom… …macita. Ay… ay, ay, ay… Mamacita. Time for my birthday, bitch! This is a creepy ass cabin
in the middle of fucking nowhere! What's the big deal? There is a murderer on the loose,
and you drove us into the woods! -Oh, my god!
-What? I forgot to bring vodka. You have seven and a half hours
until you're stuck here forever. I need to stop
all this horror before it happens. Do the machines kill us all? No, they more just rip apart
the fabric of our society via dance videos on TikTok. They use dance against us? Come on out.
The water's warm. Just so you know…
I don't do blow jobs. You pee out of that thing. [scream] Just think…
Maybe if she did do blow jobs, she'd still be alive. Yeah, let's not make that the lesson. 80s weed sucks. It's just dirt. Look at all these twigs. I could give you a gummy this big that has one hundred times
more weed than this.