Mormon Fundamentalists Ruled This Town For Almost 100 Years (with ‪@GrowingUpinPolygamy‬)

so there are still people that follow Warren Jeff's living here today and there's also some that live here that are following another man you would never guessed this but a lot of the walls have been taken down really there so many that I have seen driving around the flds believes in keeping things they were when Joseph Smith was the prophet keep sweet I think that is still attached to ruling Jeff's old home that is a really big home that had a lot of additions added to it as he married more wives and not they have no idea what to expect either so even if abuse is happening to them they wouldn't know that it's abuse they would assume this is normal cuz it's the only experience they've ever had when I was driving around I probably still saw maybe like 50 houses with Zion uh-huh this is my childhood home oh wow no one lives here now it's been abandoned for quite some time over here is where a lot of his wives were supposed to stay then you have this like Courtyard in here that's completely surrounded with these extremely thick walls it would be a lot more scary for the girls because they have no idea at what age they're going to get married I mean I have I've driven around here today like or and yesterday quite a bit and I haven't had anyone follow me yes and we were immediately followed hey everyone Sam here with growing up in polygamy today I am here with Alyssa it's been a lot of fun walking around my hometown here uh where I was raised in the flds church hope you enjoy you know I actually came to Colorado City uh me and my husband drove through here in like 20 probably 2015 oh wow 203 like that you know right right when we were first married and this was still all totally like nice and new right I mean I have I've driven around here today like or and yesterday quite a bit and I haven't had anyone follow me yes and we were immediately followed it's a very different place now that very very different place and we can talk about people being followed in that as we walk around the meeting house here Joseph Smith was the one that that finally said okay we are not doing this anymore and that was the end of it but because Wilford Woodruff signed the manifesto admitting that this is not a law of God basically the flds church say he's a fallen Prophet okay even though he practiced polygamy himself because he was willing to admit that it wasn't called of God they said he's obviously not a prophet then damn okay yeah yeah so and then from there things just went a different direction this is the meeting house what's left of it it is it has been torn down basically and is being rebuilt for a type of community center so it's kind of cool to see that they're going to use it for good uh because so many stories and so many even negative stories are told about this meeting house and kind of what it represents uh as a young boy I remember sitting in in these meetings so many meetings seems like we were always in meetings in the flds the even though it was a very tight community and we we did a lot together everybody kind of knew each other we were still separate by family we kind we were supposed to kind of keep to ourselves and not really uh make a lot of friends outside of our own families which is interesting but uh but even within the community we're the families were pretty separate and the rules were very different depending on which family you belong to and like which was were the rules dependent on your hierarchy within the flds basically a lot a lot did have to do with that the the families that were really high up in the church generally had more strict rules and the ones that were not so high up in the church uh it's crazy some of the stuff they got away with I I couldn't believe it I mean my my father was he had a very high calling in the church he was the mayor of hildale so everybody knew him so we had to be very very careful and try to set an example his name is David David Z FS yes okay he here uh I don't believe he lives in this area anymore in fact not all but a lot of those that follow Warren Jeffs today have been told to leave right and uh basically the reason behind that is too many people that have left the church or apostates are moving back to the community and so they're not supposed to be here mingling with them yeah I saw something that basically the us or the like Utah government kind of seized a lot of property from the fldd yes and then it's been reallocated or sold and a lot of people who left the faith have come back to kind of reclaim their family home or their home of their childhood yes basically coming back and paying the back taxes because a lot of people Warren Jeffs was telling people not to to pay the taxes on their property okay and of course that's where all the evictions came from so those that were raised here and had childhood homes here if they were willing to come and pay the back taxes they got their homes back oh so a lot of people were coming back and paying that fee when I was driving around I probably still saw maybe like 50 houses with Zion uhhuh would they is that just because people leave it up cuz whatever or are those people still LDS so there are still people that follow Warren Jeff's living here today and there's also some that live here that are following another man that claims to be the prophet now and there are a few of those men that are doing that okay so maybe some of those Zion signs are from those people and it could also be a an empty home someone that just left the home and and no one's living there at this point okay so cuz he kind of has moved his family out as a way to protect them or like continue to hide them yes that's the rumor and Warren Jeffs Warren Jeffs at one time had about 80 wives so he had a lot of wives so many that a lot of us in the community didn't know how many he had and uh a lot or I should say most of those wives are still waiting for him to break out of prison because they still fully believe he'll come back yep and he's probably prophesied that he'll come back yes he's he's taught that that the heavenly father will break down the Prison Walls and he will walk through walk free like prophets of old W you know breaking down the like stories of Samson and things like that from the Bible yeah so they believe it they believe that one day he will walk free and come back and and gather his people again and and prepare them to be lifted up or for the great destructions as they would call kind of the downside of religious persecution is it makes people more radicalized and it like proves it proves he's a prophet because he's being persecuted right and it makes them more I feel like if you're already so deeply in it makes you more embedded into your cult yes it's true it seems like the more strict the rules got the more firm the people got in their beliefs beliefs they really just continueed to follow him no matter what because they have been told and I was told my whole life that the end was coming and that the tests were going to get harder and so when things got more difficult we just assumed oh yeah this is exactly what we were waiting for which means that the end is near we have to be more faithful yeah well this is crazy this is the first time I've seen that gate really probably because they saw your YouTube videos know it's funny I was here recently and there were people working on the meeting house here and I I just walked in and said wow what some beautiful changes you got and they they didn't like that they kicked me out so it looks like they're getting more strict about people walking in and I think this just has so much attention this town has so much attention now that Warren Jeffs has been in prison for so many years and he's still still to this day from his prison cell is leading the flds people right he's just making a lot of phone calls yeah phone calls or writing his so-called Revelations I would like to know why it is that every member that gets uh or any leader that gets caught and put in prison for abuse of any kind just so they they get obsessed with writing their stories and that the world has to hear their beliefs and writing these what they call Revelations and you see it time and time again and Warren Jeff is no different he's writing all these Revelations making rules more and more strict for the flds people is it true I've heard that they there were at least for a while there were no more marriages allowed and basically he kind of froze the community because nobody can move past his incarceration I know that I'll get hate for this comment but my personal belief is that Warren Jeff's put an end to relationships even those that were already married husbands and wives they could no longer touch other than shaking each other's hands wow no hugs nothing like that my personal belief is Warren Jeff said if I can't have anything they can't have anything either it was a control move that's what I believe uh right over here you see these doors on the back of the meeting house like I say everything's torn up now it used to look so different but this is where Warren Jeffs and some of the leaders of the flds church would Escape if a an the FBI showed up or law enforcement showed up to catch them they they had an Escape Route they would rush out these doors jump on four-wheelers that would take them straight down into the creek here as we call it the creek and just they had an Escape Route they would head down in the creek and they would just take off and hide from law enforcement how often did something like that happen uh I think law enforcement showed up here or had eyes on the building a lot just to see if one of the leaders would walk in uh I personally remember sitting here once when the FBI did show up and we were bowing our what year would have this this would have been in 200 I want to say 2004 2005 how old were you I would have been 17 okay yeah 16 or 17 okay it was a long time ago for I mean yeah that's old enough to have a very firm memory of it yes but we were bowing our heads for prayer and all of a sudden we heard a super loud commotion in the doors right over here which we can see on this side of the building there was these big glass doors to the entrance and we heard this loud commotion and it was the FBI trying to get in and and get and catch the leaders and so we heard this loud commotion we had bodyguards fds bodyguards that were holding him back eventually they broke through the barrier and by the time I opened my eyes to see what was going on all of the leaders of the church were off the stand they had disappeared wow so we looked up and it was just the person saying the prayer at the at the pulpit that's all there was so they were very well prepared to escape if someone tried to get them from this meeting house here and I mean they worked how it took them years to find Warren Jeffs right yes they've started looking for him I believe he was put on the top 10 most wanted in 2003 or 2004 they finally caught him in 2006 wow so he escaped them for a long time did they did they arrest any of the other leaders I've only I mean I've only ever heard of Warren jff but you'd think there'd be a lot of accomplices yes and they they did catch a lot of the accomplices they released most of them and then caught them again for something else they did later and then they keep releasing them because there there's not enough evidence on other people for a lifetime sentence yes and is this was this a secondary meeting house no this actually here is a Schoolhouse okay cuz it looks so similar right so this is a Schoolhouse and I actually did sometime in homeschool in fact it was in this door right here in this corner of the building where I was sitting at a very as a young boy and learned about the the Twin Towers being hit by the airplanes in that building wow in that building now you may see this building and think I had a normal education even though we did meet in different buildings throughout the Ed the community we were homeschooled okay so it was always one of the mothers I have four I had four mothers growing up in the home it was always one of the mothers or one of my older siblings that would teach us uh any kind of school do you feel like you I mean when you think about your education did you get do you think like a a a fairly good education or was it pretty low level I'm curious how we did have books from the outside world originally we were allowed to have some books and we had some trainings and some different types of material that Warren Jeff's himself created okay so when I lived out here I thought I had a fairly good education but when I left at 2008 in 2008 Yes I realized very quickly how little of an education I had I could read fairly well and that's that that's that's all I could do math I still struggle with math to this day because the first time I went to an actual math class was when I was 22 years old I believe 21 22 years old after my mission with for the LDS church which is kind of crazy to me that you left the flds this hyper religious setting and then you went and served the mission for another two years like the full 20 years of first 20 years of your life has totally dominated by these religious groups right after after living and growing up in the flds church a Mormon mission was just normal life to me yeah uh we weren't allowed to date we weren't allowed to swim we weren't allowed to listen to what we call Gentile music we weren't allowed to watch movies or TV so it was just a oh hey I'm familiar with this so the flds belief is well very similar to the original belief of the mainstream LDS church they they originate from the same place they believe in Joseph Smith that he saw the father God Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost and saw them and communed with them they believe that they believe that uh Joseph Smith was the first prophet of this dispensation or of the restored gospel and you guys would read the book of Mormon growing up did you have the same hym book yes well that's a great question so the yeah same Book of Mormon we would read growing up in fact during my childhood here in Colorado City we would often go to Deseret Book to get the Book of Mormon in the Bible and things like that as you know the mainstream LDS church has changed a lot with the times to try to keep up with Society in well to the best of their ability obviously a lot of people would say that they're nowhere close but compared to the fds church the mainstream is completely modern uh they've made changes the flds believes in keeping things they were when Joseph Smith was the prophet and from there Joseph Smith they believe in Brigham Young as a prophet John Taylor as a prophet and then came WF W yes yes did you learn the song you probably didn't learn the song of latterday prophets are number one Joseph Smith no because we had Prophet we we had only the three and then from from John Taylor came John woy and then Lauren woy John Barlo and then it just went down a different line of profits because Wilfred Woodruff was the official put started putting an end to polygamy he wasn't the one that really put an end to it but he signed a Manifesto basically getting the government off of the church's back and that's when they were able to join the us as a state right yes to keep to make Utah a state so they were kind of their hands were tied they kind of had to force them to sign this document to say yeah we're going to stop practicing polygamy and then the Utah was able to become a state and also the government was threatening to take away their money take away their property and things like that so they were kind of backed up against the wall I've seen a lot of people call Wilford Woodruff a hero like he made the hardest Choice which was to end polygamy and nobody was wanting it or willing to do it and he I mean I feel like modern members would view him as the most like one of the most influential prophets right who did great thing you know got this great Revelation and made the modern Church possible yes and uh so that it's interesting because the fds have a different story my father was my well I guess my grandfather was one of the key people that kind of got the flds church rolling in the direction of leaving the mainstream LDS church continuing on with the polygamy so so my father I never met my grandfather but my father was is also very much familiar with the church history and the the split off okay and so I heard a different story growing up that it wasn't really Wilfred Woodruff that put an end to polygamy Wilfred Woodruff sure he signed the manifesto but it wasn't until Joseph F Smith that he the two prophets later that finally said okay no more yeah we're not doing this anymore cuz Wilford Woodruff he still was with his wives John Taylor was still like those prophets were still kind of had wives exactly they didn't break up the families yes they didn't break up the families and there were still some people getting married in polygamous marriages but in secret okay so we made our way to the baby baby Cemetery in the flds community and a lot of people are wondering why there is a baby Cemetery here why is it separate from the main Cemetery which is on the other side of town and there's a lot of rumors and speculation about what's going on here a lot of law enforcement people are concerned that maybe there's something really sketchy going on I when I was raised here I was under the impression that it was simply where the babies were buried that were still born or died very very shortly after they were born and were perfect Spirits they didn't have any chance of corrupting or sinning their anything like that in their life so they were buried in this special spot for perfect spirits which is the same the mainstream Mormon church has the same belief if if a baby is still born it's because the baby was so perfect in the pre-earth life it doesn't need to be tested in this life and it can just go basically from the Mortal to the afterlife and go straight to God essentially right and I don't well you told the same thing that if a child was was born a still born or died very soon after after being born that they had proed they they had proved themselves in the spirit world before coming here that they were they were Val yeah same word Valiant you know extra Valiant in the war in heaven right and because they were so Valiant in the war in heaven and the same thing for people who are born with really severe mental incapacities another thing that I've heard from people that are still active in the flds church is that this cemetery is here because of the very close in proximity to the clinic where all the babies were born so they said it was very convenient to have a location nearby for the babies now that didn't really make sense to me that's just what I was told because you're not going to have a stillborn baby and and toss them into a graveyard nearby right like there's go there should be a service and there should be some time between so but you didn't have any services so there there is one baby half sibling that I have in here but she was born and a still born and was buried before I was ever born so it was it wasn't something that I personally experienced I know when I spoke with the other man who grew up in the flds he also said that there's more he said that he thinks there's more infant deaths in the flds because there's a lot of inbreeding because the there's not like enough records kept basically so that not none of the cousins marry each other you know what I mean and that is true and very unfortunate that some of the babies buried here are not on any kind of state registry they're they they don't exist right because you didn't receive a a birth certificate I did yes you did so congratulations thank you I I'm I'm legal I'm legal I'm alive so unfortunately as time went on after Warren Jeffs was put in prison there were a lot of assigned how do you even say this assigned relationships where there were these manall seab bearers that were the only ones allowed to have children and some of these children don't exist on any kind of paper document and that's because I guess why why why why were some permitted to be on paper documentation and one some were I think that while Warren Jeffs has been in prison most of them at least based on what I've been told have not been registered wow okay so but before he was put in prison and before he started making a lot of these really just odd and strange rules for the people before that things were a lot more I guess you could say normal more normal than they are now from what I've heard like ruling Jeff's was I mean there's all these prophets all these people who are still practicing polygamy but it seems like some prophets were trying to make it as moral I guess as possible saying you know no cousins marrying you need to be 18 you know we're not going to marry sisters that kind of a thing basically that it was under war in justff it became way more Twisted illegal underage brides and that kind of thing what I call a good childhood that I had out here was when Ruland Jeffs was the prophet now some of the things Ruland Jeff was doing behind closed doors I don't even want to think about because one of my own sisters married him and she was a teenager he was in his 80s and she was his I think about 60th wife wow did she have children with him I no not that I know of no so and he he was fairly sick at that time and he didn't he he passed away not too long after and then after that because all marriages are assigned and arranged here after that she was assigned to another man and I know she has had at least one child at this point with someone else he maybe rulin was better to the general populace of the church but still was doing a lot of these horrible practices behind closed doors that's that's what I don't want to think about but no no no it's it's a valid question but some people also are under the impression that Ruland Jeffs was doing some of these things because Warren was starting to take over at that time and was forcing his father to marry all of these women because Warren Jeffs did take multiple of these women to be his own wives after his father died wow so it's it's just a it's very sad and didn't he say when Ruland died didn't Warren say that he kind of became grin and that was he was taking on his personage yes and that was why like that he was being reborn it came kind of what happened with Brigham Young right Brigham Young and Joseph Smith right because when Brigham Young said he was he was meant to be the predecessor people in the meeting said he took on the he looked like jph smph Smith and then that that was kind of the beginning of Brigham Young and his claim to Prophet being the prophet yeah I think that both Warren Jeffs and the entire Community including myself we were all shocked when Ru and Jeff died because we were told that he was supposed to be the last prophet before Jesus Christ returned he said that he said that he taught that yes Ru and Jeffs taught that and Warren Jeff's reiterated it okay so when he died of course he has to come up with something that makes sense so he says and a lot of people assume that he was just his father basically his father took over the younger body of Warren Jeffs and continued on leading the church wow yeah it was very confusing your adolescence was when all of everything hit the fan yeah so that was your entire teenage years was war and Jeffs him fleeing everybody trying to figure out what to do did you ever go to the ykz ranch the YFZ YFZ yes you're in frion that's what it means okay yes yes so they're in Texas I never went I was never righteous enough to go which I was very sad about that at the time I had siblings that went and then came back later and they couldn't say one single word it was so so secretive but I was never good enough to go and be a part of that now I'm grateful but at the time it was so secretive only the elite at first it was just the leaders and like the youngest children right the little I at least in a book I read basically they said anyone under eight they would take the the kids that was referring that was referring specifically to Warren Jeff's Family okay but there were other men and women through the community of all ages that went to help with the construction and the building of the place okay yeah but you weren't righteous enough I was never good enough thankfully they tell you I'm sure they never tell you what you've done that made it so you can't go they just tell you or were your sins made known to you yes oh check this out really quick here so you can see they even wrote on here stillborn on the the gravestone Jess Jessup is such a big llds name and Lehi that's in the Book of Mormon yeah Benjamin I saw Don Carlos earlier Don Carlos was one of Joseph Smith siblings yes in fact I was named after Joseph Smith's brother Samuel okay in fact my middle name is Harrison just like his wow I have a a brother named Joseph a brother named Don Carlos and uh and then a bunch from the Bible and all in my ancestry it's all Joseph Joseph Samuel never never Layman it would never Layman yeah there's so my whole family history and that's why even they I why they added the middle initial to the names of the prophets because there were so many Joseph Smith prophets yes we were basically always under the impression that we were doing something not quite right because we were the idea was that you were supposed to be perfect and if you weren't perfect that there would be something that you did in your life that would prevent you from going to Zion that would prevent you from allowing the people to be saved or for Jesus Christ to return and we would get phone calls I got this once from the bishop at the time and said hey Warren Jeffs told me to call well they never said Warren Jeffs it was always Uncle Warren I receiv received this phone call me and multiple of my other brothers and they said hey Warren Jeffs has received a revelation that you have been not following the rules and that God has spoken to him so we need to know have you done this this or this and they gave us a list of things some of these things were like have you ever listened to Gentile music some things that were very likely something in sometime in our life we did that probably have done but basically he's trying to out you well and then of course and almost like if you say you didn't do it you're saying the prophet lied exactly so you have to say yes to one of the things which of course we did something throughout our life and when we said yes then it just reaffirmed to us that oh my gosh he is a prophet he's receiving Revelation he knows exactly what I'm doing so is very scary but that would happen and that's why that's how so many of the men and women were kicked out of the town without really a good explanation other than just you weren't following the rules H fascinating I mean it's such like what crazy manipulation Tac and it's like similar things happen in Mormonism where you get your patriarchal blessing and it says you're going to be a mother and you feel like you almost have to become a mother because it was prophesied so it's it's a very self-fulfilling prophecy because they say it's going to happen and then you feel like it needs to to be the truth in order to prove the truth of the religion back in the beginnings of the church there were a lot of I command you to get up and walk you know very very straightforward and over over time even in the flds church it's got gotten to more based upon the will of the lord we we give you this blessing if it's if it's his will there's no more commanding because it's almost like the co the commanding goes wrong so often right that they if they' go off the rails and like I just listened to the story about Joseph Smith like Pro um saying that a baby should rise from the dead right and then when the baby doesn't rise from the dead Mo a lot of the people in that meeting end up leaving the church because they've seen hard proof that he's not actually prophesying right and so it seems like the the spiritual leaders have learned that they can't speak to definitively like when they say the the world's going to end so many people have said okay the world will end in 1932 and then it doesn't and it's almost like if you make too many claims your religion will die out because people will know you're lying that has happened here a lot of people after Warren Jeffs has said in multiple occasions and even rul and Jeffs that the destructions and that the end was coming on such and such date and if it didn't happen a lot of people wondered why but of course he would turn it back on the people and say it would have but you weren't you weren't ready you weren't prepared for it yeah I saw another thing about Warren Jeff's that he he basically when he was on the Run he was saying God has told me I need to remove move myself because the community is too evil so once you're more righteous I can come and minister to you but right now I need to be removed yes when he was really in Vegas right like I mean I've heard that he was in Vegas he was at Disneyland he was all over the place just spending spending millions of dollars that the community was giving to him assuming that it was for the building up of Zion is what we were told and he was I don't know what he was up to but it was very frustrating to see him in these different pictures of proof that he was at these places just having a good time yeah and how I mean the flds it seems like they've had millions of dollars like in these different trusts or hidden under these all the mattresses like I mean he had I even saw that one of these men who have come after him had a Bentley just like a 500 I don't know how much a Bentley cost but they I mean and they have Mansions they have is the where is where's the money coming from well we have a a gold mine I'm just kidding I was like where is it P to the gold mine wow I didn't know that no so really it comes down to hard work hard work very little vacation very little money spent on anything other than just the Necessities for the family and then the amount of work I mean gez other than Sunday I was always working wow and even Christmas and holidays we were working and you do you go so do you go outside of the community and work and earn money that way and then so that a lot of the work cuz I feel like it seems like that you obviously did a lot of work building houses but then a lot of that work is also outside getting money yeah so we would work in multiple different surrounding states in all kinds of construction okay uh within the community we could build an entire house very very easily everybody had different skills so yes we were all over over primarily in Utah Arizona Colorado nearby States doing construction work yep and that's that's really good money if you're good at it it's it's a lot of money yeah and so was there a set tithing like did you give 10% or was it just I I guess I've heard that he would say I need x amount of dollars and everyone would scramble to try to earn it that was what it came to is basically when there were there were these things called tithing calls and he would say I need every man over the age of 18 to give me $2,000 tithing calls yes and then they would give them $2,000 so basically everybody had to every adult at least had to have money set aside always in order to give it when called upon okay so this here is now called The Most Wanted hotel and the reason for that name is because warren j was on the most wanted list of the FBI and this was a place being built for him and all of his wives now he never lived here because he was put in prison before it was ever completed the walls are the walls and I do want to point out in fact I'll see if I can pull in here and not get shot at but I'm just kidding now it's just a hotel now it's just a hotel but look at these walls how thick they are so this what this was is you see the big gate this was built like a prison in the sense that the idea was Warren Jeffs would pull in pull in here he would have security the big metal gate would close behind him over here is where a lot of his wives were supposed to stay then you have this like Courtyard in here that's completely surrounded with these extremely thick walls and up ahead is another big gate do you think they're actually yeah I me I mean a p we just got kicked out yeah so there's still still security there hey we didn't get shot at no no no we didn't we got honked at we got honked at so and then there was another big metal gate in there where Warren Jeffs would go into that gate and it would close so there were two huge Gates that would open and closed behind him to keep it very very secure but he never lived there because he was in prison when it finished so but it was just it's crazy to see the amount of security that he was building up for [Music] okay oh look at this they're actually flds people you can see here just by the way they're dressed that they are still active flds living here and uh let's see if we can get honked at again yeah I've that's my third sighting I've seen I saw some at the cemetery when I went to walk around the cemetery I saw some at what looked like a health clinic and then that's the third time I've seen it anyone yeah so this here used to be the entrance to the clinic where all of the babies the fds babies were born this is where I was born wow in here we had a uh several midwives the the main one was her name was Aunt Lydia we called her she was married to the bishop at the time his name was Fred Jessup and we would come here and if when a new baby was born the family would gather here in the waiting room and the new the mother would bring the baby out and pass the baby around and we each get a few minutes holding the baby but uh by the time I was born there were already about 15 children born before me even though I had that many siblings by the time I was born there were already many of these siblings that were older and had moved out and were married themselves so there weren't that many people living in the home at one time I think that the highest there were about 19 people living in a home and so these people you said are flds probably I mean the blue dress is very they're still dressed like the flds they look very much and this this guy standing here looks like he's dressed just like those of the flds and you can kind of tell it seems like because they have they'll like the men will always be wearing long sleeve shirts yes and I know too the con the construction situation right because they let the houses be they don't completely finish the houses see yes and there's a lot of rumors about what the reason for that is one of the most popular Reon rumors is that they did that so that they wouldn't have to pay taxes if the home wasn't finished what I've heard yes and that is very likely that some of the people did that my home was finished my childhood home was finished on the outside and I don't remember us ever trying to avoid taxes or any of that kind of thing but once again every family was a little bit different uh I always assumed when I was living here that they just didn't finish it because they rent out of money oh okay because the inside of the homes were always finished and then the outsides not always got a good finish on them so so a house like this I mean there's so many houses like this in the community would this be a flds house because they're it's almost like their apartment buildings but they're massive and they seem like it seems like only one family lives there but they're big enough to be apartment yes and that's that was the idea in fact right out here this is my childhood home oh wow obvious does anyone live there it's a big weed garden now no no one lives here now it's been abandoned for quite some time so when you lived here did all the moms live in one home yes and all your siblings uh-huh so this right here was where all four of the moms lived and my father each of them had their own room down here on the the left side is where the boys rooms were and we were split up in by age group not by who who's um see who's who mom who who was the mom who not by who was the mom but by age we were split up in these different rooms and on the right side the girls lived in the basement and so how many people total were probably in this house about 19 okay wow at one time it did seem crowded at times yes but we did have it was set up similar to like a hotel in the sense that there were so many rooms lining the hallways there's a boy up there I think that looks like a fds boy up where up in the the top above the door oh he's watching us he's giving us a dirty look good good good you're so good I feel like I see the dirty looks and my soul just goes cold and you're like yeah I've I've been you're just so used to it I've been given many dirty looks in my day so I'm used to it now now but yeah my home my childhood home used to look better but it is it is finished on the outside unlike many of the other homes the newly built homes I don't believe they are flds currently believing in Warren Jess you know we might do is stop in front of Ruland Jeff's house as well okay and get just perspective of what that was like that's over that's overlooked a lot because people want to go straight to Warren but Ruland Jeff's where he lived also is where Warren Jeffs had his office and would meet with people and a lot of the young girls would go to find out they're getting married in this office what are the primary differences growing up as a man versus a woman flds because I know you're separated for a lot of that so what could if you maybe could just walk us through like what is the average life like for LDS Woman versus a man so the women are told that their primary purpose in life is to Bear children and raise those children and take care of the home that is the primary purpose and uh and to in doing all of that be obedient to their husband because the husband is the priesthood holder man of the house the one that's in charge and then of course the husband is supposed to listen and obey the prophet of the church so with that said it's clear that the man is in charge and all of the women are supposed to just obey him so the responsibility of the man be perfectly obedient to the prophet make sure that the wives are being obedient to you and uh provide for the family so that's the I mean there were some differences between each family but that's the generic rule on what they were supposed to do now growing up in my in my childhood home it was very clear that the boys were allowed to get out and do outdoor things and play and get dirty and that type of thing a lot more than the girls were and my sisters would complain about always having to do the laundry and the cleaning and all of the different things around the home while the boys got to go out and play we weren't supposed to be playing we were supposed to be working in the garden or doing something that could uh be some type of work or make some kind of money but we would play a lot as young boys just you know trying to keep entertained uh but the the girls I guess that it was a lot more scary for the girls because you're probably just kind of waiting for the day that you become a plural wife so you're kind of training training training yeah it would be a lot more scary for the girls because they have no idea at what age they're going to get married for the boys I was under the impression and most of the time the boys were in their 20s before they would get married so not that that's not that that's old but it's a lot better than older than 12 12 or 16 years old yes so for the for the boys it wasn't such a scary thing but for the girls you could be called at age 14 one of my sisters was 14 years old got called that she was to get married to a man that was in his 40s and she was to be his second wife now wow that's just a scary phone call just so so scary I remember and the dad just has to come and say all right you've been called to be married yeah I remember the day that happened in fact it was two of my sisters got the call at the same time and by they they didn't get the call from the prophet but my father did and if you say no to the prophet you're saying no to God so you can't say no he's conditioned to believe that is coming straight from God and he's he's staked everything he has on being part of this religion exactly so if he says no he gets he gets kicked out right and his whole 30 person family yeah I mean now that I have a daughter of my own I know I I think and act differently than I did when I was a part of the fds so it's easy for me to say this now but I would never allow that to happen to my daughter but when you're in it I was never a father in the flds and so I can't say how hard that must have been believing in it and getting that phone call yeah but I do remember my sisters both of them the one that was 14 she was almost 15 but she was still 14 and then my other sister I believe was uh I think she was 16 or 17 uh both got a call at the same time and they just I mean beat red face is very very embarrassed at the idea of it and then just scared crying how much time do they have to to come to terms with the fact that they're going to be married to these men uh in most cases it was just a matter of a couple days wow and they didn't know these men they didn't have any idea what they were getting into other than they just assumed it was called of God and so it should be okay and it sounds like some families like your family that you were born into are more kind and it's a better environment but you don't know if you're going to be married into a family where there's physical abuse or I mean I don't even know how much anybody is talking about physical or sexual abuse so anything to do with sex wasn't talked about there were people that got married and this is a very popular story that goes around because it's so shocking there were people that got married in the flds church and after a year or so of not having any children went to ask the local nurse what was going on and come to find out they weren't trying they weren't having sex no they just assume they just thought that marriage means you'll become impregnated yes wow they were like for four-year-old kids that just assumed you get married and you have a kid you know and so like the stor will just come along right yeah so it was very much and then does the nurse in that case would she instruct them finally someone's going to tell them how to have sex at that point yes they were told oh you have to actually you have to do something right you can't just hope that it happens and but that type of thing happened and for my from my personal experience I was never taught anything about sex nothing I mean which is so crazy that it's a cult I mean it's a religion or a cult or whatever you prefer to say built on sex like polygamy is about of obviously to the flds it's about the religion but it's also about spreading your seed you know it is and that it's a sad thought to think about the fact that that just goes to show how much control the man had over the women if you're not teaching the women what is supposed to happen or what what is going to happen you know you're just sending the girl in sending them in and then uh the guy just teaches and says what he wants to say of this is how it's supposed to be done now who knows how they're introducing that to the girls yeah the girls are just thinking well this is what God wants me to do so here we go and it could be potentially different depending on which marriage because it's so not talked about that right which really if you'd never talk about there's so much it leaves the door wide open for abuse I mean it's not even just at that point about the age difference between the man and the woman it's also just that the woman has literally no no idea even what consent is no idea how to like this you know you can say no none of those messages are ever given I'm sure well and not they have no idea what to expect either so even if abuse is happening to them they wouldn't know that it's abuse they would assume this is normal cuz it's the only experience they've ever had like I wonder well I'll just share an experience this isn't about sex but just an awkward topic that I went to my mother about I said uh in the Bible it talks about circumcision and I said what is circumcision that was the most awkward conversation I've ever had in my life with my mother about something so simple because it was in the Bible and so I was curious yeah or even it says I mean the Virgin Mary my sister once asked me what is virgin mean and we were probably 16 and 18 and she's like what does virgin mean we still are trying so hard to Cobble together an understanding of what any of this means right and I I remember asking my mom what the word means uhhuh and it was the same thing where I asked at the dinner table I probably was in third grade and it was like everyone's silverware clatter to the table and everyone stares at me like where did you hear that word you can't see that friend again we never say that and it it just helps you learn that you're basically punished for bringing up sensitive subjects your parents so next time you have a question what are you going to do and you don't did you did you have internet access no I mean most people now would just Google it right see I didn't have internet so in one of the school buildings there was a Biology book so I did learn some things in that Biology book the holy book right I was like finally but had I been caught looking at that book I would have been in big trouble yeah and your garments cuz I mainstream Mormon garments are the it's like a cap sleeve and it goes down to your knee but your garments you I think I read you start wearing them at 3 years old it wasn't or just in childhood you start wearing them from as early as I can remember we started wearing them and those are wrist and Ankle wrist and it's actually how the original Garment of the mainstream l or mainstream Church Mormon church was presented except for it doesn't have markings yours didn't have markings no markings even the adults even the adults wow so but it was a full one piece with a slit in the crotch area that you would put normal boxers or underwear over your underwear wow so but it was like a full piece garment and then it would either snap up in the front or button up in the front and you so it's so interesting to see how like the vestiges of Mormonism stayed with the flds but your first temple was the the temple in Texas right because this community does not have a temple I was thinking about that when I was looking at the flds uh Cemetery if you look at a Mormon Cemetery there's handshakes a lot of the gravestones have handshakes and or the more modern gravestones have temples that'll be the temple that the couple was married in whereas your gravestones don't have any Temple symbolism right which I is so cuz the temple is like the heart of Mormonism but where's your temple okay so that's a great question so we were always told that the temple was coming that the people were not prepared for the work in the temple yet and that all of the work being done in the mainstream Mormon churches or temples was blasphemy it wasn't done correctly that's what we were told and that the temples were coming when the people were prepared enough that's why the YFZ I say that right Ying for Zion yes the YFZ Ranch in Texas a temple coming there was such a big deal because finally people were righteous enough to go right but it was once again put on the people that the temple was coming but we weren't prepared for it yet so interesting however I which is you'd think that with all of the money that the flds had they would have built one sooner cuz when I saw the pictures of the interior of what is it again the yearning for Z yeah when I saw the interior of that Temple it looks like they're they're mimicking the LDS temple they have the baptismal font I saw a room where they have a mural which is like a mural that looks like the Garden of Eden yes which is what would be a normal like a LDS mainstream LDS temple they had a I think I think they had a veil they had a Celestial room it looked like so it looks like they were mimicking the mainstream Mormon church and I'm curious like where they even got that information so so it the information was passed down from the beginnings of the church because the temple clothing like that you're familiar with all of the symbolism and all that Ruland Jeffs when he died he was buried in those clothes really Temple clothes mainstream Mormon it looks the same but he was he endowed I I I can't imagine that he was ever apart or that he was endowed in the mainstream yeah cuz they were fully excommunicated long before he he was the prophet but still I wonder where they get that I wonder where they get the clothing so but it it wasn't too far back where the members that became flds or became the the beginnings of the flds church were originally a part of the mainstream and then they they broke off from it so that's where I think those ideas came from and they just passed them down through the church so This Is War rul in Jeff's house yes well this is a part of it there are so many keep sweet do you see that oh hey I never knew that there were two chimneys that said keep sweet on them but as you can see there are multiple homes within this gated off compound and how many houses do you think are in this commune or how many people the one that says keep sweet I think that is still attached to Ruland Jeff's old home that it's a really big home that had a lot of additions added to it as he married more wives but I would say they're probably let's see 1 2 3 four maybe six or seven homes within this compound and then if you hold this then I can show like how big the these walls are like I don't know if the camera makes it easy to tell I'm 5'7 I mean yeah they are very big walls and solid brick I helped with the construction of these walls okay when I was younger we I mean and look how they go so far so many so many places in this community have just just the most wild walls and surprisingly you would never guess this but a lot of the walls have been taken down really there so many that I have seen driving around so as we get up here in front of what used to be Ruland Jeff's home the wall has been shortened so that you can actually see the home when Warren Jeffs was here you couldn't even see what was going on behind any of these walls the gates were always closed uh this the wall that has now been shortened was this is the shortened one yes used to be way taller so you couldn't see anything within the walls wow but you can peek in here you see the white door there mhm that is the door to the offices where people would come to meet with Ru and Jeffs or Warren Jeffs Warren Jeffs also had an office right inside those doors okay and they would come to get instructions about who they're supposed to marry uh if you had an interview about something bad maybe you did and had to go get in trouble with the leadership uh that was the door I walked through as a young boy when I first met and shook the hands with Ru and Jeff and warrren Jeffs so it was a very special moment for SC did you feel I Pro did you feel similarly to how you felt when you met Elder Holland no no cuz I was younger and I had been taught my entire life that these men were the greatest thing on earth they were constantly talking with God so when I walked into in through those doors there I literally felt in my heart that I had entered a Heavenly place and the the peace and the love that I felt was just so overwhelming because of what I believe these people were and how special they were and now to know that some so much abuse and so much just uncomfortable things to even talk about were happening right through these windows and walls and because of the way I was raised though I I of course would have never in a million years imagined that something bad was happening in there yeah especially when I mean when you don't know about sex when you when you don't really know anything it it reminds me of when I went to General Conference for the first time and I saw the prophet sitting there and you you literally think you're sitting in the same room as somebody who has spoken with God face to face uhhuh and even to be in the same room with someone who has spoken to God face to face feels like a Transcendent experience it does yes and you you know the warm fuzzies you definitely get them cuz you're you're thinking to yourself that person over there go back down literally saw God yeah it's a it's a surreal experience and of course like you mentioned I also had a similar experience where I met Elder Holland after I had left the flds joined the mainstream LDS church and had been taught about the apostles and Prophets but I was so new to the church I didn't think it was a big deal I thought oh everybody in the church sees the prophet everybody gets to go and meet the apostles not you know so it was a special experience and Elder Holland was very kind it was a very nice visit that we had but because I was so new to the church it would have been so yes it would have been so different for someone like yeah if I met Elder Holland when I was on my mission or something I I'm sure I would just I would have felt what exactly like what you're describing just and and I think it's that feeling and then when you go talk to everyone else and everyone else is saying the same thing I felt so happy I felt so the spirit so strongly it's very affirming yes you feel like this is obviously the God's true church on the earth because I'm feeling these feelings everyone else is feeling these feelings yes you can Rin you can you could come and live here if you wanted to right yes kind I don't know how would have you ever thought about moving back here along with some of the people you said have done the same so I've thought about coming out and trying to buy a home or or buy a property here just to have something but my wife is a city girl yeah and this is a small town in the middle of nowhere so small it would be hard to get her to move here and not that I am really wanting to that much either but you could um I I mean I chose to not stay in Utah after I left the church so oh look all the doors are open just goes to the the parking lot man it's just crazy to be able to see through all the gates all the doors are unlocked because when I lived here you I mean you would see Warren Jeffs pull up in his car we get to the gate he would go through here in a minute and the gate would open he would pull in the gate would close behind him and you would never see him get out of his and even as a member you don't get to have even know what his special world is like yeah you just assume that he's talking with God and that he's doing things that are so important that it's some little person like me it's none of my business it's just what I assumed yeah there are underground tunnels underneath BYU uh and there apparently also all over Salt Lake so that the prophets and everybody can move through Salt Lake without being you know having anybody see them and how there's also apparently a stone in the mountains there's a vault with all of the family history and stuff uh and I feel like Mormonism they just are really good at building their little secret fortresses wanting to persecute us and that's the Dream Center and here is now the Dream Center and the gate SL garage that Warren Jess would pull into yeah you just see this massive gate which it's crazy that like within this community which at the time was already probably almost only flds right that there's a gate within this community you'd think maybe once you got past a certain level then everybody gets to be kind of part of part of the community but it seems like the community is closed off even from itself right which is wild yep it's crazy and I think that a large part of that was because Warren Jeffs wanted people to feel that he was too important to be seen just out with the normal people in the and that there was too much going on not to mention that there was a lot of government and officials and stuff like the FBI trying to trying to find him so that's another reason that he was trying to hide and even someone else said that the uh a lot of at night a lot of the families would be moving around or like people would be going from house to house I don't know yep yes and so that that was all done after around the time I left and after I had left I didn't experience that but yes that type of thing did happen where people were constantly being moved so that they could never feel that they had a real grasp on life that they had to just or Roots yeah so they could they could be willing to be moved and just told to do whatever whenever and it made it made it very difficult for them to feel enough selfconfidence to stand up against the church or stand up against anyone and possibly leave because they were always being told they needed to move and it's crazy [Music] gate is this would this have also been part of yep so one of Warren Jeff's uh brothers would have lived there wow so it was all within this big wall we briefly touched on it but maybe just to go into it a little bit more is um how our faiths viewed each other from Mormon to flds for me as a Mormon I we always very much viewed the flds as the crazy cult they're not like us we you know we're righteous and holy and they're the apostates and kind of like I I mean I I would say I first got introduced to the flds maybe when I just around the time of Warren Jess and asking my mom you know hey are they are they like us and she was like no we're completely different and she she differentiated so much that I would have even said you guys don't read the book of Mormon you don't worship Joseph or worship Joseph Smith you don't talk about the history with Joseph Smith and turns out there's like way more similarities than I really reckoned for depending on the person you talk to I know multiple families in St George which is the city nearby here that would say that the flds people weren't bad people of course weren't Jeffs as bad but that the people are good and they're so close to believing things the correct way but they they Le they're just slightly LED astray but will be easily convinced that the mainstream LDS church is the truth on the other side so yeah that's that's I mean that's pretty compelling yeah so just depending on the family of course other people would say that the flds is the worst religion in the world and that they're nothing like us you know so it just depended on the family but I will say how we as flds members looked at the mainstream LDS church was that they were the Great and abominable Church talked about in The Book of Mormon oh cuz we learned that that was the Catholic Church always somebody's going to and the reason we looked at the mainstream church that way is because they were this big fancy church with the big fancy temples yeah great and spacious building the great and spacious building and that they were just trying to show off how fancy they were and that they had the fancy clothing yeah and things like that and we're over here Meek and humble and have our plain you know clothes and and dresses and things and so we thought the Mormon church has similar Doctrine but they have fallen astray and of course they will have a chance to repent on the other side which is so nice I mean we're both kind of coming at it in the same way which is on the other side cuz you did you guys have Spirit of prison Spirit of paradise okay very very similar the afterlife is really a second lease onl life for every person who's ever lived I mean I feel like the Mormon loophole is to never learn about anything in this life have your fun and then in the afterlife be taught the gospel and then convert once you have more proof that God is actually the Mormons were right all along if you apostatize from the church if you leave the church you're done goodbye that's like your your soul is Straight to Hell basically wow you you are you get gave up what you knew to be true you denied Christ is what they would say and you made that decision therefore there's no hope for you in the next life you're done wow so it's basically like outer Darkness yes like those who leave the llds go straight to Outer Darkness yes because that that's the worst sin you could possibly commit is leaving the church and that's why it's so hard to make that decision because if you choose to leave you're not only leaving your mortal Family behind to potentially never see them again but you're also giving up your eternity in the next life you are agreeing to Hellfire and Damnation outer Darkness for the rest of Eternity wow so it's a scary thought and I believe that I I believed it and even when I left I still was very nervous that I would be struck by lightning that something bad would happen to to me at any moment because I was told that I was being completely controlled by Satan if I choose to leave it's sad though because they believe that yeah I mean I used to believe it I know my mother here in the flds she believes that I am lost for all eternity because of the decision I made I don't I don't get to see her I haven't seen her in 15 years wow I think a lot of people have said how could a mother do that to most people people they see that and they say you know it's incomprehensible for someone to leave their child like that do you think because it's common it's like well my sister did that to her child and she's so do you know what I mean maybe it's just so normalized that it doesn't feel as horrible as a lot of people view it the reason that I'm just the worst in my mother's eyes is because I was the first of her children to leave okay and s then I've had multiple of my siblings that have left as well and so I'm not the only one anymore I think that she does still hold a lot of hope for her other children that are in the church and that she will at least have an eternal life with them so it's uh it's still very heartbreaking but I know that if I could talk to her today she would just say she would just beg me please repent and come back you know this is the truth even if she doesn't fully believe that I could come back if I wanted to she's still going to beg because that's all she wants for me is to be with her again do you think she knows you have a YouTube channel no I know I mean I guess she doesn't use the internet she doesn't but I do know that some people within the flds have found my YouTube channel and growing up in polygamy and they have definitely not appreciated me talking about even though I try to be as respectful as I can while sharing facts she does they they do not appreciate me saying things the way they are yeah which is exactly how I have experienced but I feel like like this conversation is obviously made clear I feel like the flds is just Mormonism times a thousand and so while my family is disappointed and I would even say potentially slightly heartbroken that I have this channel your family I mean they don't first of all they don't even talk to you there came it came down to a choice that I felt I had to make I had to make the decision to live a life for myself or be be told exactly how to live my life for the rest of my life I and you only get you only get one and then you die and if you used your life to follow a religion that's false it's just a waste yes I mean it's not a complete waste but in some ways it's at least a small waste in my opinion to dedicate your life to something that is not true right and that's kind of what it came down to is if I remember thinking actually when I was still in the flds church I remember thinking if I come to find out one day that this church is not true I am going to be pissed because I'm living this very restrictive life because I believe it's true and uh I'm not that mad anymore now I'm just sad I'm just sad that I don't get to be with my family and or a lot of my family and that but but it's you know I'm happy I'm happy to be where I'm at I'm happy to have the family I have today and the kids I have and the wife I have and just have built such a beautiful life for myself of course those still believing in the flds church would probably look at me and say look how dark and awful his life is because that's just what they believe but I know he's just out here watching Disney movies yeah exactly how dare he yeah but I know what I have and I wouldn't change it for anything well that's very beautiful and I'm sure people tell you a lot that you're very brave yeah well thank you well you are I mean I feel like sometimes I feel like when I talk about leaving the Mormon church I feel like I'm being melodramatic because it's not like it's not a religion you have to escape with 20 bucks in your pocket but it's you know it still has such a strong psychological hold that it is really hard to leave um um but I mean I think leaving something like the flds where you're literally never speaking to your mother and father and siblings again I mean that's crazy yeah I have had some on I don't want to completely say I've never talked to them again I have on occasion it used to be less strict so I have on occasion had an opportunity to speak with my mother and uh speak with my father but that's how I know that all she would say to me is please back because I've had that experience with her but I haven't seen or given her a hug in at least 15 years at this point yeah do you think that maybe when she's older and maybe nearing death like you'll have that opportunity I sure hope so you know it's it's one of those things that uh in her mind in all of the flds mind this life is just a very small blip just come down prove yourself that's it just prove yourself it's all it's not a very big thing and then the next life is where it all begins you know that's where the eternity we living with God happiness all the goodness begins right so for her I I don't think she would have like a dying wish that I would get to see her I think that she would just say he made his choice I'm off to the eternities but I would hope I all I can do is hope that I will get that opportunity before she passes on hopefully she has a lot more years ahead of her but U you never know know you never know hey everyone Sam here with growing up in polygamy uh me and my wife talk about a lot of experiences both within the flds church my wife was raised mainstream LDS so we do a lot of comparing flds versus LDS in our videos today I am here with Alyssa it's been a lot of fun walking around my hometown here uh where I was raised in the flds church I was raised with Warren Jeffs as my uh childhood Prophet so had a lot of experiences with him he's currently in prison but still leading the church today so check us out on growing up in polygamy hope you enjoy