roasting a chicken & the Desperate Housewives Game💞 !links

guys um I am here I need to announce that I'm live I also um I'm trying something new well here okay I just took these potatoes off the grill grill I was like something's wrong my camera my thing was all the way up there um I just took these potatoes off the grill they look like so I they've got a lot of spices on them um this is my second time making potatoes in the pet Grill I'm uh also going to play Desperate Housewives but also uh there's a chicken there's a whole chicken and a bunch and some other vegetables that is still in the pet gril um but it's I set a timer for 20 minutes cuz it's both like almost done Jack is very upset that I have potatoes and I'm not sharing I should take a picture with the grill huh with the chicken yeah I'll be right uh I'll be right back guys sorry [Music] oh wait where's my chat hold on there you are hi Ally you thank you look so this dress it um it doesn't fit it's too short like it's like a shirt like my ass is is out like it's not a dress like it this this is not a dress booty is out it's not a dress um and it it comes up very high in the front too um so I put on shorts they're the same color underneath so it looks intentional um but yeah I made these potatoes the chicken there's a whole ass chicken hi okay those okay there's a whole ass Chicken on in the grill in in the smoker uh smoker grill combo um and so there's a whole chicken and also ve other vegetables the potatoes were done first I have this is only my second time trying to I made a whole chicken yesterday cuz my dad was here for a day just to empty a they bought a house so he he came to town to empty a storage unit and uh so I made them a whole chicken cuz they don't eat red meat and my dad is very much not a grill dad he does not have that skill set he's not that type but everyone loved it it was very good but the vegetables took forever cuz I didn't put them in at the right time so this time I put it in put them in earlier but I still don't have the timing right because the potatoes are done before it's true good thing my dad has a grilled daughter now here's the question so here they are they have a i spiced them with um so I used a combination of an Amish spice mix called Barn dust Barn dust um which is really fine like a really wide range of spices in one that I happen to really like and then I also added cumin uh paprika and a lot of onion and this also has a little bit of salt and I used olive oil and they're very good except that they're really big pieces cuz I didn't want them falling through the grates so I need Sal salt because the inside of them isn't salted I didn't like soak them in salt water um yeah Barn dust okay so I have a timer set huh and oh look what I have set up hold on hold on hold on oh I never I didn't I took a photo outside to announce hold on hold on hold look at my potatoes look at my delicious potatoes wow look at my delicious potatoes U I'm going to take you guys out me with me to look at the chicken and stuff and see what can be done you're grilling with [Laughter] me okay I need to actually announce that I'm live um Jack is upset I need to grab salt mhm okay it's not Barn dust it's Farm dust there were several different kinds of dust at the Amish food store oh it's backwards there were several different there's like a lot of spices that they sell in this little town in northern Indiana and uh I went there and and it's um I got three and I wish I had bought more because they're so [ __ ] good that's [Music] related Jack has been naughty all day and I think it's because my dad was only here for a day him and the puggles my dad has two puggles they're like Jack's closest dog friends and they left and so all day he's been a terrible Pest and I think it's cuz he's upset that my dad left and he took his dogs and everything hi hi okay I'm announcing I'm really doing it I'm really doing it it's happening uh smoking a whole chicken and um playing the Des Housewives game on Steam right now I haven't started the game obviously because we're going to take I want to take I'll start the gaming after the chicken is no longer in the smoker um the grill okay and then I'm just going to copy this paste it's posting Twitter always takes [ __ ] forever um but yeah the potatoes look really [ __ ] good so I'm very pleased yesterday I found that the Jack I really like onions and bell peppers when they're roasted so that's what's in there with the chicken um but they they like there's so much water content in those vegetables that they're taking like a real long time like I can tell they're cooked but they're not roasted so but I so then I thought it's at 500° so now I don't know like should I increase the temperature to get like to get more caramelization going with the vegetables while the chicken's still in there like is like should I increase it from 500 to like 550 I don't know cuz I'm new at this um thankfully I I have I'm a good cook but so I have some at least knowledge you know I'm not starting from absolutely nothing but um you think they'll be good smoked okay well yeah we we actually just ate one of the potatoes there's other veggies still in there and it was really good I was worried that the smoke cuz I've only I only like have ever thought about like meat being smoked I hadn't thought about ve veggies being smoked so it was really um I was like is this going to ruin the flavor I don't know is it going to be bad the whole my whole house by the way smells so [ __ ] good because of that Grill okay I've posted on threads I just have to put jack oh I didn't give you any so the spices themselves you can't have but these are big enough potatoes that I can cut out a piece in the middle for him that won't have any of the spices on it he's like Mom your my grandpa left and he took the dogs with him I'm upset yeah grilled vegetables oh so good or like roasted um I love me a pellet grill the pellet grill is so good the pellet grill best purchase in a long time like it's so [ __ ] good uh okay oops oops oops uh words paste done uh story okay then I just have to post in Discord and that's the last place jack you're driving me up the wall you little monster you little perfect angel who is being extremely annoying and naughty um paste link Co oops not not open not open link copy link um paste and photo and then I'm done bam I've have announced even yeah these are so [ __ ] okay so I have I'm EA I'm putting a little bit of salt because they're big pieces so there's you know but oh yeah I was going to give Jack some this is for Jack and I just here you go yeah you're an angel no I could just put my cam my phone outside point it at the grill grill can but it's just a closed Grill oh we could we could do that I have it set up M Grill cam okay time I said a timer oh no hiccups um I really want to get more of the um Amish like spice mixes and rubs and stuff internal temp of two two six yeah so I had I put basically last time I put the chicken in and then once it was time and then I like got the chicken I let it smoke you know at a low temperature like 250 or something and then then when it was time to increase the heat to get the skin on the outside of the chicken to be crispy that's when I put in the vegetables but then they took too long and we ate the chicken before we ate the vegetables so this time I put it all in there at the same time and uh the potatoes are still done before everything else but that's okay it's it's it's a you know it's a partial win oh no I dropped a piece that's perfect for Jack actually how I take show up I did earlier yes I did and I shaved everything I can't do my legs cuz I'm wearing um compression stockings wait what does it say on the timer six more minutes and then I'll te I'll check the check on the chicken and I think the veeg like the remaining veggies probably need to be like stirred or something I hate showering because hot water and also having your hands above your like up up like this a lot and bending over a lot is really bad when you have pots not so much of the hot water the hot water it I just do like lukewarm showers but um I pot so my blood pressure gets too low it just like drops makes you feel terrible um and it like tires you out like crazy because your brain and like body is struggling to get out of oxygen um so so I just like shaved before I showered instead of and so like that's the struggle always I'm like oh I want to I want to shower but and it's going to take forever I'm going to shower this and then I like give up I like wash my hair in my body and I don't shave I just shaved beforehand like watching YouTube and then I showered like why have I not been doing that why why have I not done that okay underdone veggies are usually better than well done veggies except for potatoes yeah these ones so it's just onions and bell peppers make your world better place by by smoking delicious food okay it's been 15 minutes I had set the timer for 20 but I'm impatient I'm taking you guys out there um let me pull you up I'm going to put you on a tripod and everything hold on girl I hope I'm on the right wi grab my tripod this way you guys are like phone right now I can oh also I don't have it set up you won't be able to hear me outside but I will probably not remember that so I probably will talk but you won't be able to hear me weing whole chicken in there love chicken up a [Music] okay I forgot um I didn't because I didn't want audio coming from two sources I didn't put I didn't put jack quiet I didn't put like turn the sound on on this so I was just talking at you guys about it so it looks like the peppers and onions are done but they're like cooked they're cooked but they're not like roasted they don't have that like roasted you know what I mean um I am I spatchcocked it and well I sort of half spatch C I don't have a poultry I don't have poultry shears I don't have kitchen shears everything I own is like secondhand from dead relatives and stuff and ex-boyfriends who left things you know in college or whatever but uh the point is uh what do you guys think about the how the chicken looks I feel like I could leave it in longer but I feel like I could also just take it out I didn't use meat thermometer in it with my little app that that tells me what the meat thermometer is doing and the grill and everything I didn't use that um cuz I was lazy and I didn't feel like washing it the one that I used yesterday it was dirty and it needed to be washed it's in there at 500° and it's been in there for like maybe 40 minutes what if I leave it chck what if I leave it in leave the chicken in for and the veggies in for like 20 more minutes we could check on it in 20 what do you guys think I'm smoking it actually smoking the chicken and then yeah yeah [Music] smoke no I don't really think there's well partially for me it's because my dad came to visit oh RoR thank you for gifting 618 subs thank you Jack Jack and the potatoes say thank you thank you red spectre's out here helping me afford meat meat to cook I need a meat daddy in my life don't need sugar daddy need meat daddies cuz meat's expensive I want to grill and smoke everything um oh my dad it doesn't eat red meat and they came to visit for a day him and my stepmom and so I made them a chicken I made us the chicken and like other stuff for for dinner so that I could feed my parents and my dad is very much like like he'll eat like a normal serving of chicken but he's like a scavenger like he'll suck all the bone marrow out of all the bones and he like goes through it so like having a whole chicken like minus the organs works really well for my dad because his lizard brain he just wants it wants to like really get up in that chicken I don't know um so yeah so that's why in my case this time I did a whole chicken um I didn't set the timer I looked at my phone it didn't set it yeah but it was Jack but yeah it was really tasty it was pretty great mhm it was great and there were no leftovers um thank you on Wednesday I'm going to look you can't even see the rest of the outfit it's matching shorts the only problem with this outfit is that the stockings go so high that it looks like I'm just wearing tights you know what I mean but really there are stockings which are superior to tights um Jack uh there was something I was going to tell you and it was oh yeah I'm going to Vegas for rare Evo on Wednesday I agreed to go with a friend to that it's like a blockchain and stuff convention um at Caesar's Palace so I'm going to be there so if any of you guys are going to rare Evo say hi to me I'm sure I'm sure I'll I'll be around um but also I have to pack for that today so we're going to play video games and then afterwards I'll pack honestly I didn't know what rare Evo was until the person who invited me to go the friend um told me what it was so I also don't know what Evo is is that a convention Jack you're going to get so much chicken just wait 18 minutes yeah on Wednesday but like I'm really tired oh it's a fighting game tournament Oh e oh like Eve online right no fighting games Evo okay confusing um very confusing um Jack do you want a piece of potato no I have to stop eating the potatoes because then I won't won have room for the chicken and the other vegetables why is it so hard though um oh okay so it's like a convention like a tournament for like a bunch of games this is like a blockchain tech and cryptocurrency related uh convention that's like really big deal um I know a lot of people uh from a book company uh there that it that um is involved so I'm G to see people have a good time I'm not going to gamble because that doesn't go well for me and I don't get any good brain juice off of it but I'm also like really tired like I just need like a month of of just routine normal I just need a normal routine like at my house not going anywhere no one coming to just like I need normal for like a month so I'm very um tired I mean you guys did kind of show me a little bit how to play poker in the desperate housewise game so who knows maybe now I'm a brilliant poker player I still don't understand poker um it's only been four minutes I really want this chicken to be done I really really want this chicken to be yeah I should take my meds um rouette I think you guys overestimate How Lucky I Am cuz I'm not lucky um but it's going to be a good time um I'm it's not like my crowd like like I'm not I jack I'm not like a cryptocurrency specific like or like blockchain Tech specific content creator or anything I'm just going as like a friends plus one so that cuz like going to conventions by yourself sucks I would rather go like with a friends um uh slot machines I could do a little slot machine action cuz you can just sit there problem is I can't drink like I can't have alcohol cuz my kidneys can't handle it and I'm on a bunch of meds it's just not good point is no alcohol for me so and I feel like gambling is a lot more fun when there's booze involved you know what I mean I feel like being sober I mean being sober makes it sound like I wasn't like I like it's like a lifestyle choice no I'm just on a bunch of meds I wish I could drink casually like a normal person normal like the average person but unfortunately I can't but it feels very much like that's part of the gambling experience and I can't have that part it's like like what's the point strip poker I could take Jack to the strip club again last time he was at the experiment Rhino my little potato dog was very popular yeah it is a bummer such a [ __ ] bummer but that's just life I would rather have functioning kidneys than get to drink but yeah uh and I was never like a heavy drinker either okay I'm not eating more potato yet cuz I need to eat chicken and other vegetables um okay so do you want to sit up here do you want to be ashamed publicly okay we're shaming Jack publicly for at his rudess look at this Rude Boy look how rude he is Jack you're so rude look it's potatoes you literally I gave you a piece already yeah it's potatoes but there's something even better outside and all you have to do is wait for the better thing like 13 minutes all you have to do is wait for there's a whole Chen chicken there's a whole chicken yeah yeah and also honestly like even if I could drink alcohol I can't drink anything I can't cons I'm like straight up allergic to yeast so I can't go to bre like I can go but I can't drink anything and I'm allergic to Hops so like so like beer is like super allergic so like beer is off the table anyway for me even if I could drink but I like me some like sugary delicious drinks the brisket was [ __ ] perfect like it was so ridiculously good it was definitely worth the 10 hours I spent total on it it ended up being like 10 hours I really want to do another one soon and start it like way earlier in the day like I want to get up at like 7 and start the brisket um but right now we have a whole chick CH in the girl hi are you too hot because your mother produces so much body heat it's kind of astonishing I'm like a furnace um and we have vegetables all beer yeah exactly so it's like yeah I just can't really be part of the culture which is a bummer I would like to it's like I like social things like that but as I will always be an outsider um and it I don't really like being I don't know but uh yeah we're going to play the game but we're going to eat chicken first the timer says 11 minutes till we check on the chicken again 11 minutes do you guys think that without a should I wash the meat thermometer and stick no I don't want to should I though do I like can I assume that this chicken after two hours of being in a grill total two hours can I assume that it's fully like like cooked to the temperature that it needs to be for safe eating or do I need to go wash the meat thermometer and like stick it in briefly like just shove it in there for a sec what do you guys think what do you guys think cuz the meat thermometers I have are ones that are like on a wire and you plug it into the grill and then the app my app will tell me what temperature they're detecting um but I don't know I'm no good at this I want this chicken so badly also in the Desperate Housewives game there's been a murder one of our neighbors got murdered we think we think I think it was well it's it's it's crooked Bank guys cuz he worked for a bank and found out people were embezzling and then they murdered him and we discovered him as he was dying and um we're uh we've decided the detectives are useless so we're on the case we're a desperate housewife in this game and we just have a lot of free time and so we're like investigating uh so that's what's happening right now The Desperate Housewives game uh which we will start in a minute hi welcome um sticking it no the meat thermometer best to be safe and wash especially when it comes to chicken okay I will listen to you um let me go wash it wash it neat thermometer real quick and and then I'll take you guys out with me uh to like um stick it in the chicken like I'll I'll take the camera with me I'll be right back [Music] come what okay um okay I now have a meat thermometer I only stab myself with it one time by accident while washing it just now only one time here's my me thermometer let us go plug it into my grill I won't you won't be able to hear me for a minute but you will be a wrong phone but you will be able to see me there it is okay like this okay hold on we're going out all what on on what hi guys um I need to look on the app to see what the probe is saying the probe says the chicken breast is 198° which is enough uh that's enough so I'm going to bring in the chicken I'm going to bring it right here I'm just going to have a whole chicken in front of me on a cookie sheet I was going to put a Lun I panicked the chicken looks very done and then I turned on I turned off the grill but that starts a fan cycle which blows Ash and I was like no the chicken so that's why I ran away and and got a cookie sheet anyway that's what happened um okay I'm going to grab the chicken from outside I'll be right back I was definitely more cautious yesterday when I was doing this for other people um and so I I umum this one isn't as pretty as the other one but that's okay there's heat lightning outside super great okay so here are the veggies I'm going to stick them in with the potatoes behold roasted Peppers bell peppers and onions they didn't roast as well as I would have liked but it was time to stop it was time to take the out regardless um uh yeah so they aren't like crispy the way some of them are but like not like I normally like them but they're still going to be good they smell [ __ ] amazing like this [ __ ] smells so good potatoes that I roasted on there veggie um whole chicken okay let's I just realized this whole time my air purifier has been on making noise in the background yay I'm turn it off okay okay so here's the chicken I'm loving loving this thing okay so here's the chicken let's get the close up behold the chicken I put more oh I put I put more like rub I rubbed more stuff on it um than I did yesterday and I'm not yet convinced that that was good or not uh it looks different but um smells good I don't know how to deal with it to cut it like where do I start I think I'm going to take a leg off I rubbed more rub I rubbed significantly more rub I'm going to just cut this leg off hold on oh my looks pretty [ __ ] good all right all [Applause] right um yeah I think this you're supposed to let it sit for like 20 minutes after you make it so it lets all the like juices move around I'm not doing that I'm going to eat it probably because mostly cuz my dog will nag me so so much if I do that okay so I have this most of a chicken I'm going to put it not in front of me cuz I'm going to eat that part that I just cut off okay um all right this I wish I had like a box you see it now if I do this almost almost might point to my camera now look at my floor it's really dirty there's like tiny pieces of wig I was cutting wigs um okay I'm kind of see it okay so we cut off a leg the veggies are here and the potatoes um what um yeah I didn't want to I don't want to wait yeah letting it rest I don't have any more patience left I ran out okay and I is it good is it a good sign when it just sort of falls apart I have a the leg fell out the bone fell out of the leg is that good or is that bad does that mean I did it too much like um how do we feel about that okay this is really hot I don't know what I'm thinking trying to okay I've opened it so now I can and it's like literally steam is coming off of it I'll give it a second and maybe the vegetables I love onions like I really love onions and S pepps and stuff okay I'm going to take a little bit of wait that's just two onions that's not both they're not as roasted as I'd like but that's okay if I could get like the perfect bite with potato onion both types of bell peppers and the chicken O So Good hey Jack you are being the worst today he is being extremely naughty he's all mad that my dad left town that my dad was only here for a day that we had other dogs in my house and his house okay yeah yeah there is a seeming I know like he has a a pretty good excuse for being naughty okay I'm putting this piece aside for him um I I'm keeping my eye on the on the grill for when it stops with the the fan cycle cuz then I can put it uh in the garage cuz I'm there's lightning out there and I'm just worried like what if it rains suddenly my grill would be no more I don't think it will but I'm still like paranoid cuz I love that thing um yeah it smells real [ __ ] good um I've never had that happen where the bone just comes out like that it's like really good like if you helic real life man it's so good mhm it's so [ __ ] good I should be eating this with my hands but it's too hot to eat it with my hands so I'm not going to I'm going to eat it like this this is extremely good I'm very pleased this is a great success yeah and there's even going to be a leftovers which is great cuz tomorrow I'm probably going to be frantically packing for my trip I won't want to cook on your wish list now oh hell yeah so [ __ ] good man I would share okay Jack is Jack come here honey oh [Music] chicken what what do that look um hi uh uh okay I don't even know how to eat this um part of me just wants to like grab it but it's too hot for that you can't can't do that oh my God so good um the Flies agree apparently apparently unfortunately there are some new flies but that's okay I have fly tape like everywhere in my house right now and a fly tap directly above my desk that has not caught a single fly hands on put the hands on that thing I might if it with some gloves I'm going do it it got really windy outside out of nowhere so now I really got to listen for the fan to turn off on girl walking chicken oh have a good day at work my okay we're [ __ ] going to town that way I can get like the perfect combo I got to get like everything like a little piece of all the things you know what I mean uh I need some pepper well okay I'll get some potato it's like a little [Music] mhm that's so [ __ ] good that's like ridiculously good um um um but yeah okay it's still too hot so hot okay maybe I should do a turkey at some point like um like a you know when you make a whole turkey and then you you like make turkey soup you make turkey sandwiches you make turkey legs like at the Run Fair you know I could do that onion good we are I should have put mukbang mukbang mukbang on my um as a tag normally I eat really quickly that's just like how I work because I grew up in a family where you had to eat quickly to get food um but this is like not easy to eat quickly and so I'm having to eat it slowly and that's so much better cuz you get to actually really enjoy it I need some pepper I'm creating the perfect B but all the PE I I need to cut the pepper pieces smaller next time I think that would solve my problem problems okay turkey noodles exactly you already spent $30 on food today um tempted to run it back I don't I don't understand what run it back means in that context I will admit it I do not understand what that phrase [Music] means but um order food oh okay I've never heard that in that context yeah I I cuz I have a lot of food allergies I can't really order food like I can't just like order from restaurants because a lot like even if they say like oh yeah this is safe sometimes it isn't you know what I mean like it's just not reliable like I can't it's not consistently reliable like I'll I'm allergic to milk protein so like not just lactose intolerant like worse and they would just be like no Dairy no Dairy there's [ __ ] cheese everywhere but then it's at your house and then you have to either order it's just not worth it essentially so I cook a lot we made a whole chicken dark be nice sorry um Jack yeah we made a whole chicken I spatchcocked it which I think is a very fun word so I say it as much as possible um I did a bad job at it but I did do it kind of uh and we smoked it and a bunch of vegetables too and then made it good by heating it up at the end so get it crispy there's so much chicken in my teeth it's really embarrassing I got to fix that but first I got to stuff more in my [Music] face and we the veggies the grill is done um done the fan circle's over done so I'm going to take you guys out there and we're going to put the grill away uh um and then we're going to continue it and then we're going to play video games uh okay let's go where did my phone go oh wait I should drink water okay there's still chicken in my teeth they're still chicken my teeth uh okay hold on I'm turning it on Jack is so I'm sorry hi guys it's Grill can I literally named it up OU all the very I was talking to you guys that whole time again because I forgot again that that I didn't turn on the mic on this I'm so sorry you could just hear Jack barking the whole time sorry yeah I know that yeah see I know that but I um I just forgot I'm going to get my dog a little plate of his own chicken and I'm going to get gloves so I can continue eating this um oh what I said outside is the grill the grill is still hot uh too hot to put in the garage it has to cool down for a little bit Justice for Jack no okay my dog has his own little plate of chicken but it's too hot he gets like he'll get like a little piece at a time you know and we're going to continue eating this chicken th okay Jack I'm going to give you a little piece at a time okay so you have to be very good that's not going to happen uh he is an ordinary old man who does as he pleases onion potato chicken Jack he's 12 and a half uh yeah 12 and a half he's [Music] old um yeah he's old and very um done with my [ __ ] like like he loves we're obviously extremely I mean he is my you know we're we're you know bonded but um but uh he's like at that old age where he's like I do what I want and I want chicken so I would to get that chicken you know I feel like it happens to all dogs they get really like I I deserve some of that I'm grumpy I feel like I happens to humans too you know like old orary people um I'm excited for the game cuz we're investigating our neighbor's death uh murder really uh I have to put the chicken away like into the fridge though I cannot forget that um [Music] oh that can be Jack potato like Mom Mom give me another bite okay here you go manipulation skill goes up gives a shake yes that is what it is like as they get older they just don't give a [ __ ] anymore they're like i' I've been good my whole life I've been a good boy and I now I'm in retirement and I just want to eat what I want and blah blah blah blah you know yeah you guys hear that is that part of the music oh it is is weird it sounded odd for some reason this song is louder than the others in for me I don't know um potato there the fly flying around my head is driving me absolutely Wild by the way uh okay this turned out so perfect I'mma kill that fly um okay okay okay okay okay okay okay um sorry I'm not talking a whole lot because I'm busy stuffing my face should I should I make eating chicken with my hands ASMR I don't experience ASMR so like I I don't know what is appealing because I don't experience the sensation like my brain just doesn't do that um I don't get the like brain Buzz thing tingles yeah I've never experienced I've tried it never has worked for me uh and I I have done in ASMR stream with with Drea but um there was at one point like Jack bar this was so many years ago Jack like barked out of nowhere um there was just like when we're being really quiet it was just it was chaos but like very fun it was very fun but I didn't know what I was doing like even more like it was a lot of not knowing okay I needed another piece of chicken more more okay Jack I'm taking some of yours your plate it's okay there's most of an entire chicken in the other room okay D you can have this last piece your little doggy plate mhm mhm I think the combo so this mix that I mix okay so this has salt onion garlic black pepper fennel maram maram I never know how to say that thyme Rosemary Savory I don't know what Savory is I guess it's an herb that doesn't grow here Sage oregano and basil Farm dust it's an Amish product um really and then I also put more onion I know this has onion in it but I really like onion so I put more onion powder and then I put paprika um and then I put cumin as well so that's what I use okay Jack I'm going I feel like your piece is too big you're going to eat it in one bite and then throw it up hold on I'm touching it without clothes okay okay we're fine I have OCD uh um how do you hide all your hair um oh well there's a photo I posted on Twitter I I don't like I have it braided in fren French braids on the but they're literally hanging out the back and I just don't turn around I don't wear the wigs in public because I can't fit all my hair okay you get to n n n n n okay all right gobl it up okay um um forgot the bone that just came right out that that oh my God okay this is such a mess I need to like wipe down this whole area and I need to put the vegetables and potatoes and stuff away and the chicken Melvin thank you for reading me hello I I was going to put the rest of the chicken in like a Ziploc or not like a Ziploc like aluminum foil and like blah blah blah I have two gallons there's just most of a chicken and it has a flock bag love that love that um okay vegetables next we done with that okay um I was using a cardboard box so you guys could see the food uh to lift it okay there's just like crumbs everywhere okay all right guys I'm going to check my teeth and I'm going to reapply my lipstick and um intrusive thoughts uh and then I'm going to um take you guys outside and [Music] do sorry and do uh and put the grill away I wish I had really like dark lips so that I could tell where they stop I mean I can tell but I have to really like pay attention you know I wish it was like really obvious just by color but I'm too pale and my lips are kind of BL bluish most of the time from not having enough oxygen uh poor oxygenation uh but like that's not helpful uh okay let's stick tattoo a line yeah but like so yeah I I I am not supposed to have tattoos technically because my immune system lime disease is an autoimmune disease so it can make your body like reject things like tattoo ink and stuff like that like someday I might I would never get a tattoo for like but like if I got like like medical tattooing like they're they've come up with like they're not on the market but you can get tattoos that tell like they change color based on what your blood sugar is doing or diabetics I'm not diabetic but I have insulin resistance which is like pre-diabetic it's like a side effect of some stuff that I have uh and um like that's the kind of tattoo I get but like I don't know um there is something called lip blushing which is a tattoo it's where people tattoo the entire lips a darker like a more like whatever skin con skin tone color they want and it just makes them like more evenly toned and like more defined and sometimes it's done very poorly sometimes it's done beautifully and it just looks so completely natural and it's like amazing it's like it's beautiful um but I do not have the guts for that plus I like the I like being able to like what if I want to change the shape of my lips like what if I want to make them look a different shape one day you know what I like by like doing the liner differently what if I want to like adjust my appearance I'm setting it with um I'm mattifying and setting with setting powder okay I am very pleased but no it's incred it's it's not I mean it is pretty common actually lip blushing is very common but um yeah know like let tattoo lips are a thing she gets her eyebrows tatted cuz yeah I know a ton of people with tattooed eyebrows um I find myself I'm very lucky that I have eyebrow hairs uh which is nice and then I just put powder I literally just put ey shadow in because sometimes the lights at my desk they make it they shine through my eyebrow hairs cuz my skin is pale and then it makes it look not good I don't know it makes so I just there's like ey shadow in my eyebrows but I would never ever get them tattooed or microbladed or whatever because uh I've seen some bad eyebrows there's some really awful eyebrow tattoos out there like so bad like so so [ __ ] bad where people just look wild um in a way that they didn't tend you know what I mean uh I just I'm not into it um okay let's go outside yeah very shocked very surprised it's like uh it's like when day seven when I get my Botox refreshed I get medical BOTOX for overactive facial muscles that are painful um and so the way Botox Works some muscles it when muscles are relaxed some of them like go like this and some go like this so the reason people sometimes with botox it pulls your eyebrows up right um if you get too much but also the way Botox works it's you know you get the injection and then by like it like increases and like it starts working and then at like day sevenish it's like really high very very botoxed and then it goes down to like like by day 10 it goes down to like a normal good the level you're like intending to have it at but at that like day seven like I I can I like I can look at photos of me and I'm like yeah that day mhm couldn't move my eyebrows that day uh I have to do it every 3 months and it's super expensive um super [ __ ] expensive I have to get everything from my from my trap like I have to do my traps and my neck everything from here up because otherwise I can't open open my mouth because my jaw muscles clamp shut and stuff like that happens and it's super painful it's just painful in general um but yeah every 3 months it's awful it costs like $1,200 oh yeah cuz they inject like I get like a lot a lot like I have so much Botox in me but it it makes my life comfortable cuz like it makes it it helps no no no every 3 months every 3 months yeah every 3 months I have to pay $1,200 to have a [ __ ] ton of toxin botulism toxin is what it is uh injected into me yeah insurance does not cover it because my my um my neurologist here is very much the type who thinks that pain isn't a good enough reason to have treatment uh he's really incompetent and he's like your face hurts and you can't open your mouth well I'm still not going to make insurance I'm still not going to do it you can't open your mouth the whole top of your roof of your mouth is literally shredded from trying to eat like chew without being able to open your teeth like very much I'm still not going to cover it yeah no I hate Min neurologist so much he's an and like incompetent and should have retired by now um the nostrils now because I I ended up the surgeon who was going to do my nostrils ended up being awful the plastic surgeon I have nostrils that collapse it's a whole thing I have to have a nose job basically but like so that I can breathe um because my nostrils do this but also on the inside um so right now what I do is I take at night uh I I wear like a little rubber thing and I stick it in my nose and it's to try to keep my no nose open at least in the at least that part while I'm asleep um guys I'm taking you guys outside that's what I was doing oops I [ __ ] made sleep I need a new phone case okay we're going outside Grill can AC um feel you all feel take ch well okay that was the best parking job I've ever done the best grill parking I struggle so much um getting it like exactly right in the garage that was the best I've ever done um um I still nose breathe at night um I have a CPAP that cover that sprays into my nose and my mouth so um I use that in combination with the little plastic things to keep my nose open the valves inside are still closing and the problem also with like this solution is that I mean it's temporary but um it means that there's a lot of air going in my nose and it means that I wake up every morning with a bloody nose like dried blood like it's really gnarly um did the grill beep when you backed it up no no it it must have been a noise in here because it's turned off there's no electricity running to it right now or there wasn't yeah it's a pretty day um yeah I would like to be able to breathe really really really like that but I'm probably not likely to find a surgeon I trust with my face in this area so I'll just just have to do it somewhere else um yeah bloody nose I have a humidifier and I also have the built-in humidifier inside the machine so the air that's blowing in has it is being humidified but if it if I set it too high like if I set it high enough to make my nose happy it makes my throat feel bad so and then I have like a room humidifier yeah it's not ideal but anyway we're going to play game I'm so happy and full of delicious smoked chicken I'm so happy and full of delicious chicken that girl was such a good investment well uh I have great links with with which the power of which helps you help me buy meat meat and stuff to grill and smoke so um there's my links wow good quality links Such Great Links uh yeah I definitely need a meat daddy like a sugar daddy but for me uh okay so we're going to play Des for housewives I'm going to drink some water I took my meds everything is good the kitchen is a disaster I need to clean up but now is another time I I yeah that's fine people get their nasal cavities adjusted with balloons my dads had that done actually where they stick balloons into your sinuses and then they expand them until you hear like a big crunch um when you feel the pop um yeah my dad's had that done it's common uh at least they used to be in like opera singer circles because it can affect the way your like your sinuses affect your voice you know um thank you I did nothing to it I just washed it and then that's it um yeah my dad thought it was fine you know didn't have any problems my stepmom also has a headed done cuz they're both opera singers I think he has nothing negative to say about it uh it wouldn't really be a good idea for me personally because I have too many complicated issues but um he has he hasn't said anything bad about it I should ask him uh no uh when I was dying my roots I dye my roots this is my natural hair color but I still dye my roots because um uh yeah my color is going away but um the point is I left it in too long I left it in 15 minutes too long so it overdevelops so it isn't my hair isn't as dark as it normally is because I [ __ ] up so it's lighter but yeah follow me on Twitter for 3 years oh welcome to Twitch my twitch I guess welcome to my twitch specifically hello welcome genetic thing yeah my aunt her hair turned like gray and white mostly white like when she was like in her 20s and I got my first gray hair when I was like 15 but I was really really sick part of it is that I um was really sick like really sick and so I think that's part of why I got it really early so my hair hair isn't like completely gray or anything but like the when the thing about your hair turning gray is that the rest of the hair that isn't gray also loses color like it's not it's not like one or the other like your natural hair color will fade a little bit uh you know what I mean so like yeah so so basically the my n this is my natural hair color um but my hair that grows from my head no longer looks like this it's like this but faded BEC even though and then I have separately gray hairs right yeah so this is this is just yeah so I just dye it to be my natural hair color um thank you what am I wearing today oh my so I think this is called a good day dress how do you say that I think it's pronounced that way let me double check let's find out because uh how to I'm just going to say how to say um definition and meaning how do you pronounce it I think I'm saying it right it's French but I don't want to get it wrong um anyway basically this is a go day dress um so this one I'm Too Tall I'm [ __ ] tall so on me this is a baby doll dress it's not supposed to be a baby doll but it looks like this and then this is not supposed to be right beneath your boobs I'm Too Tall this is supposed to be like way lower on you and then I have shorts that match because unfortunately this dress is too short once again because I'm too tall and I have compression stockings for my pots my postal orthese T of cardia syndrome um that's the outfit I actually my plan uh yeah I don't really like baby doll dresses because I prefer things that go to the waist and a baby doll goes like above the waist to right below the boobs so what I wanted so I don't wear this dress very often because it's like not the shape I like so what I'm thinking about doing is making it into a skirt because I could just do a a tube of elastic around like cut off like from here up and then just do a tube and then it would just be like a little skirt and that would make it a little bit longer so it would cover my ass and then I could just wear it as a cute skirt and it would have like the the inches necessary in back to cover my ass uh yeah and that would be really nice I would [ __ ] love that um okay so so so so I can I need I don't need to be on my Grill's Wi-Fi anymore we finished smoking the chicken and I can turn off the uh Grill cam okay Grill camam has been turned off uh uh true yeah there's nothing wrong with being tall it's just really inconvenient when it comes to clothing because like it's not just legs that's longer you know it's like the whole body so all like all like a lot of a lot of dresses that I buy that are mini dresses on me when you buy them at the store and when you see them on the models and like like they're sold as like meaty dresses which is like dresses that go to like here like below the knee slightly or um so like but then on me they're a mini dress so I just specifically like I don't buy mini dresses because then this happens and I can't wear it because you know yeah I have a super long torso well part of the problem is that I'm very very curvy and people when it comes to like curves and being plus-sized people tend to make the clothes wider but they don't make them longer like enough like like like I have huge boobs right so they take a lot of space to go around but they also take a lot of space to go from here to here more than a flat person like like a lot more than a flat person like like when I'm wearing like a strapless bra and I I measured from the top of the bra so like where clothing would be to the bottom of the raw it's 10 in like it's 10 in just for the boob and most dresses and like clothes and stuff they they they a lot 10 in for the whole top to the Natural waist which is down here and so it's like well okay I need more than 10 inch unless I want it to end here you know what I mean and I don't want it to end there I want it to end up my natural waste because that's flattering on my figure and I it's what I like um but unfortunately they don't a lot 10 Ines 10 vertical inches for boob um and it's very frustrating well I like belly shirts but it's it's no good like if if if I don't get the 10 inches there then it just like I'm constantly pulling down the shirt because it'll ride up in the back and like my bra will show like not in a hot way just in like incon like it it ruins the look kind of way um you know what I mean I need those 10 in and and they don't account for the same thing with with the booty I got a fat ass right and the vertical distance it takes to cover my ass is significantly greater than the front where I don't have that so like skirts need to be like significantly like a few inches longer in back and skirts typically are made a little bit longer in back but like this much and then it it's like when I put it on it makes it look look like the front is longer than the back and it's like that's not cute and also my butt is out but not in like a hot way it's just like uncomfortable you know anyway yeah it's really frustrating clothing manufacturers do not consider that curves are not just horizontal um yeah I got a bunch of custom clothes made earlier this year and they were all wrong they were all completely wrong uh like they did everything wrong I really want to go to Vietnam M because they have like a ton of uh really affordable like Custom Tailoring so I could go and just like get a bunch of clothes custom made to my body normally here I take clothes to the I have like an alteration shop but it sucks there aren't a lot of options right and last time I went one of the skirts is like crooked like truly one side is longer than the other like sideways it's not supposed to be um and it was wasn't before they made it they sewed it uh and one of the other skirts has like a weird lump thing on the side and also I'm the same size that I was then but it's somehow too big still like they didn't take it in and there's just a lot of issues and then I could take it to a different alteration shop but that lady is like 90 and she doesn't believe in tight clothing because it's not ladylike so if I want something form fitting she will like not do it like like she will literally just not make get form fitting cuz she's 90 and she's like no no no can't show off that figure you know um yeah yeah getting [ __ ] altered when if you have a good alteration shop is [ __ ] amazing it's it's like it's it's the best absolutely the best um it's very frustrating uh being tall and it's great but also inconvenient oh but yeah that's the thing about Vegas I'm going to Vegas this week right for rare Evo there's a fabric store in Las Vegas that's very good apparently it's like massive and they have like everything and it's really good and I use it sew a lot like a lot so I'm not bad at it I'm okay at it what I like when it comes to sewing is not skill and knowledge it's like patience um but now I have Aderall back then I didn't have that uh the point is that I am just going to get a bunch of fabric when I'm in Las Vegas because I have several things I want to make and then I can make the stuff like to my like to fit me you know so that's the goal I that's the thing I'm like most excited about Las Vegas I want that fabric store and there's also a lot of clothes that I I um cuz I got an app where you cat like you catalog all your clothes like everything you own and I did that um and there's a lot of clothes I'm like I never wear this like I forget I own it and I've been like examining why I don't wear it and so now I'm I'm thinking like there's a few things that I could literally just alter like I just have to add like a triangle of fabric and then I would like it like I would like the piece of clothing you know so I'm just going to like change some things and make things like things more to my taste so that I'll actually wear them yeah but yeah that's one of the things that this is this is going to become a skirt um I am amazed by how I mean it's not exactly the same but I am amazed by how well these shorts go with it pretty good yeah there's no undies well there are there are but um you're not going to just going to see short H I'm getting that post delicious meal exhaustion sleepy no we're playing Desperate Housewives uh I want caffeine right now I had Aderall when did I take my Aderall has it worn off I don't think it h well but I can layer it because of the dosage maybe it's time for more but I don't know I don't know when I took it what I really want is a pink drink from Starbucks but I can't like I really want a pink drink right now like really want that but I cannot justify it I can't justify I ordering of pink drink cuz then it's like someone's coming to my like they have to go to the Starbucks get the pink drink and drive to my house also I can have one drink but the urge the urge is so strong I'm so that it's a craving a very serious craving um well no yeah so I'm not ordering I'm not ordering anything cuz when you order fabric online you never know whether like exactly what it's going to be like I'm just going to go to the fabric store in Vegas when I'm there there later this week $20 yeah exactly and it's like I could get the 30 o version and then maybe it makes sense but then I have 30 o of pink drink that's a lot I can do 20 30 might be a lot but I really want it and I never order stuff I ordered Five Guys the other day and I hadn't ordered anything in like months because I just don't order food or drinks or I just don't order like through I don't do cuz I cook everything so every once in a while I do get to treat myself you know but I don't know I don't know uh I don't know I don't know if I can adjust it yeah I like I order stuff like once every six months maybe maybe a few maybe twice every 6 months or something I don't know like it's really rare like I'll go a very long time without it it I only ever order if there's something going on like some reason why I can't cook like where it's just not like I ordered the reason I ordered the food is my fridge was broken and I I was like well I can't cook the the guy needs the space to like work and the my kitchen counters are covered in frozen food uh that was in my freezer that is broken you know um so like door Dash or something yeah I just don't use door Dash or any I just don't use that stuff more than like once or twice a year unless my brother comes to town uh because he likes doing that they like doing that that doesn't count because I usually don't get anything I they they we do it on my phone but we don't we don't um I don't really get much um should I get a pink Drink hold on I'm doing a pole okay half of pork loin last night I have a bit of that left that sounds like a real [ __ ] good dinner sounds great um let me turn off the music so I can start the game I'm tired but I also still need a pack too I have to consider that that I have to remember that packing has to happen cuz I I have to wash for everything to be dry like dry dry before I leave I have to Pat I have to do washing tonight I mean normal things will be dry but like some things take longer to dry you know so I need to do laundry last laundry before trip and I need to pack o okay hold on I'm going to open the door to my sun room because uh my sun room is where all my clothes are they're just like scattered over the sun room because that's where I've been putting my clean clothes I need to put away my clean clothes but that's like a whole day um not this day but I got to like but it's too hot in there that's it's not like useful in the summer I can't like do anything in there it's too hot but so I keep the door closed so that I don't have to pay as much in in um air conditioning because it's not going to do anything anyway it's just going to suck the cold out so I'm going to open the door yeah if I open the door now you see in a few hours I might it might be like a room that people can be in like I could go in there it might be cool enough okay let's see what you guys said should I get a pink Drink VI results zero for no and three for yes all right well I mean it wasn't me who decided it do I even have the app on my phone still that is the question did I delete it I did wow I don't even have food delivery apps on my phone hold on let me go ahead and uh do that get that wait no I can I can do it through instacart I don't need to do it through door Dash or whatever yeah you could tell I don't do this very often by the fact that I literally don't have the apps on my phone um okay I have unused restaurant credits so maybe it'll be $10 off let's see Starbucks Starbucks [Music] Starbucks yes that one the close one no this one's the close one wow pink Drink please with no strawberries this is good yes okay hold on I love it uh okay there are a lot of things I have to do okay we're getting a big boy because I don't know we might as well included strawberries we're taking those away no strawberries what we want is I love strawberries but they're they they're the freshness is inconsistent we're doing coconut milk yeah well let's do almond milk and see if my like how my body handles that no can't do that no no doesn't let me change that never mind it looks like I should be able to I don't need any syrups I don't need any weird sweeteners I don't need splashes of tea I don't need cold foam I don't need powders or juice options I just need it to be like pretty normal okay uh add one to order now will it let me is there like a minimum for me to use this coupon cuz it's a $10 coupon and the order is only $7 no I have to have like a minimum order to use that coupon ridiculous priority that's right you heard it here how much is this oh okay it's not that bad with priority it's only like 16 bucks that's not bad uh okay everything is good I'm doing it I'm G to give them a tip of course obviously obviously I'm giving them a tip bam Apple pay I'm so [ __ ] excited I need it I need the life I need the caffeine because it's like the right amount of caffeine that it almost certainly will not set off my um the thing where I lose oxygen to my arms and legs and they go all floppy uh from caffeine uh that happens when I do like like if I drink like a whole regular coffee that would happen but with a pink drink it doesn't seem to happen and I don't know if that how much caffeine it actually has in it it has happened a few times when pink drink but I've had a lot of pink drink so and generally it doesn't happen um and it only lasts a little while if it does Chinese use chopstick a I grew up eating with chopsticks at my best friend's house as a kid um because she was Chinese and was really good at it and at this point I have not eaten with chopsticks in so many years I'm probably horrible at it ah barbecue sauce would make a porkloin with barbecue sauce sounds really good um that sounds ridiculously good actually um game all I can think about is pink Drink pink Drink and packing underwear travel outfit okay so oh I okay hi four years hello hello hi hi everyone hi friends let's do this do I have it in me to dive in let's wait for caffeine let's wait for [ __ ] caffeine I need it to make my ADHD be able to handle it the problem with the The Desperate Housewives game is that it's so good like it's so so [ __ ] good that like and there's only one of them there's nothing else like it in the world right it's Unique and it is a Sims knockoff but it's Unique in how they did it like and I have not found anything else that hits the spot quite like this game in weirdness and like this very specific like flavor and um and so because it's so precious and limited it's a limited resource because there's only one of them and it's abandoned wear okay bye Z thanks H hang out um enjoy that delicious meal uh it um um because of that it's like I always want to do it justice like I don't want to stream it if I'm like not at like my best version of me because like I want the streams of this game since there's it's such a limited thing to be really good you know I want to do it justice the one who voices missing Pokemon pass away see um I may she rest in peace I I wasn't allowed to play with Pokemon as I wasn't allowed to enjoy Pokemon as a kid so I didn't actually like develop any kind of nostalgic like any kind of emotional attachment to Pokemon um I like some characters I like the villains I think they're pretty fabulous Misty is very cute little kid I think I like the style of Pokemon it's Pokemon's one of those things I wish I could enjoy but it just doesn't capture my interest you know what I mean and it's because I wasn't allowed to interact like I wasn't allowed to play with Pokemon or watch Pokemon or anything as a kid because my parents well part of it was probably the main part was that my parents my mother specifically thought that if that if I watch Pokemon stuff or play the games or anything I would want toys I would it would encourage consumer materialism consumerism and I would really want the toys of the game of of the shows and games and stuff um I mean I would have but like that's normal kid stuff like that's normal for kids like that's not a problem um so anyway I never got to enjoy or interact with Pokemon at all as a kid which means I have no attachment to it but I do uh hope she rests in peace because that's a sad thing nonetheless um hi Rena how's it going how are you oh wait where did my music go did I turn it off cuz I was going to start the game and then I ordered a drink instead um I'm good we uh we smoked a chicken on the grill we ate said and a bunch of veggies and I we ate said food the rest of it in the fridge and uh we're going to play Desperate Housewives game probably but uh I ordered a pink drink so we're waiting for my caffeine to arrive cuz my ADHD is causing some issues for me there are so many flies in the house again now that because of um me having to go in and out of the house a bunch through the grilling uh oh yeah yeah no worries Jack is good Jack um was throwing a fit about wanting chicken so that was he was really dramatic about it um my dad came to visit so he got my do Jack got to play with my dad's dogs yesterday and today and it was great although like man I dogs at the puggles while my dad and my stepmom went and did stuff with like the storage unit and uh so I I'm sitting the pugs the problem is that every time these dogs puggles are half beagle half Pug they're like big is they're like medium dogs they're great but like every time these dogs come to my house they have diarrhea on my carpet I have very few carpets like rugs in this house but they will find one they will have diarrhea on it and then they will pee somewhere else too like they don't do that at home but at my house they will and I think it's cuz they're traveling so you know um but so I was I'm like paranoid I'm like okay well these dogs can't have free reign of the house so I closed all the curtains that kind of separate they're just regular ass curtains that separate like the that area so that they had to be in this area and they can just walk through the curtains like they could just walk through it but they AR they weren't quite they don't understand that so it was like perfect because it kept them contained where they needed to be like around the desk like in this area because they couldn't figure out that going through a curtain is possible but uh and then I also while I was like doing prepping lunch and stuff and like doing the chicken and stuff in the kitchen I made them hang out with me in there by building a barricade of like a big old tub of wigs and a piece like a big 30 gallon bag of clothes I'm giving to charity and like I built a barricade cuz my kitchen doesn't have a door it's like an open like doorway thing and um they did climb over it a few times but which was amazing actually but yeah they just they just their guts get a little [ __ ] from traveling yeah yeah and I took yeah so they're but they're great dogs but also like it makes me appreciate Jack so much because Jack is hypoallergenic he doesn't shed uh he's small so like he is pretty stinky occasionally but like the puggles are like another level of stinky like like one of them walked up to me I was outside with leashes one of them walked up to me and let out an audible fart dogs don't have butt cheeks and this dog an audible fart right in front of me and that's classic puggle that's very classic puggle they just they're very dog dogs you know um they're great animals but uh it made me really appreciate my little tiny multi who like doesn't shed there's not hair everywhere and he doesn't have Dy on my carpet and you know what I mean so uh anyway and then it was so precious they kept howling for I'm sad they kept howling for my dad being very dramatic and then I I have all these plants back here and uh they put their back like my stepmom and my dad put their backpacks there so they wouldn't be in the heat of the truck while they were like putting stuff in the truck at the storage place and the dogs like snuggled in into like in that spot so they're like in the plants but like snuggled on the their parents my parents backpacks like so cute good Ser animals too yeah puggles are fantastic animals they're they have great temperament um they're extremely food food motivated typically typically so my dog he's not a Puggle but puggles are great animals like he's they have two puggles they're rescue Puggles and then growing up once we moved to America so like when I was like 11 we got um a Puggle from the pound um and that was my first puggle and his name was Pugsley and he is he was Jack is the perfect dog he's under the desk right now in his little doggy bed but Pugsley was before Jack time the best dog ever like that dog was so smart so smart with the perfect temperament like the patience with anyone and like the social intelligence it was like amazing like I've never yeah it it's he was a remarkable animal um I only play uh royaltyfree music on pretzel rocks because that's where that's the site I use so no I don't not take um kns are such good creatures they're such good animals they're such [ __ ] good animals um oh posture check I didn't notice I've got good posture no one can and I'm just look at this such good posture oh my um such good posture oh my so good I am really Amazed by how well the shorts match it's very good I have such good posture wow the camera's still pointed down kind of because I have the Flies I have food um okay it's time for violence if I just hold this and those they flying around my head got oneid there uh this not the best way to do this but there's so many electronics around here oh my God there's so many get off there's so many I have fly tape set up so like it's the something F but some of them finally landed on the I have a I have a fly like a fly tape thing but it's like a cylinder it's not just like tape hanging down above my desk specifically cuz the Flies love this room and there's a few of them on it finally for days there's been no flies on it and now die [ __ ] no uh oh it survived um [Music] uh they're on my lights too I don't want to like break any of my electronics let me slat you let me slat you get off my cables get off it's also handy when they land on the curtain because I can just whack it without if I can yeah when they land on the curtain it's good okay more more I'll probably end up in the fly tape that's in the window but there's so many oh oh my God how oh there was one stuck in there I guess I'm so bad like my aim is so bad um just like unreal how bad it is maybe if I like like make them you know if I make them move and stuff they'll fly into the sticky trap cuz there's more in the sticky trap already which is [Music] huge I'm just bad I'm just missing uh yeah dogs are great companions Jack Loves hunting flies but these flies are all up high so you can't hunt unfortunately uh okay so there's some on the lights still I'm just afraid I don't want to like touch my lights with this you know Jack it was just the Flies it was just the Flies but it was just the Flies honey there's no one here oh there is someone here actually oh my my pink Drink oh my God I forgot my pink Drink okay myig drink has arrived the yeah but then you end up with salt all over your house um okay here we go okay I will be responsible put that in the trash I'm so excited about this [ __ ] pain drink Jesus okay today is like the day of of like Edible Delights we smoked a chicken potatoes onions Peppers we ate it and now pink Drink it's like Perfection there are still so many flies but they are landing on the sticky thing that's hanging up there so it is working finally after days of not a single fly on it I have a small light trap in my bedroom to try to catch mosquitoes mostly but there haven't been like there's been mosquitoes this year but not nearly as many as there used to be cuz we were in a drought we're in a drought hi Jor how's it going we just smoked went to chicken a little bit ago and ate it and a bunch of vegetables and stuff and we ate it I mean it's a whole chicken I didn't eat a whole chicken and uh now I'm drinking a pink Drink To to treat my ADHD because I can't remember when I took my Aderall so I don't know if I should take it again so instead I'm using caffeine to self-medicate um so that I can can do things like maybe play Desperate Housewives or pack for Las Vegas cuz I'm going to Vegas so [ __ ] good I don't think I'm dehydrated I just needed a paper I guess I never order stuff like ever so it's like a special um and also we've been hunting flies cuz they're so many I kept having to like open the door to do the grilling stuff and then I kept and I had to leave it open while the grill was turning off while it was doing its fan cycle just in case it started raining because there was Thunder and stuff and the girl can't get wet right it's electrical but um so uh flies there's a lot of flies in my house right now royal blue which royal blue blue on what my grill is a pellet grill uh oh sky blue yeah I would say sky blue royal blue tends to be dark like slightly light like this is royal blue this is something that treats Mass Cell Activation Syndrome oh I should actually I'm so glad you said something because I actually need to take this to drink this paint I forgot to do that um no worries I just confused uh oh yeah the it's a pellet grill and if it gets wet um like if water gets into the pellet Hopper that would uh be a problem like it's got pellets in it right now so it would um Gunk it up um and it's like very new I don't want to break it I mean I don't want to break it even if it's old but you know what I mean and then this is an enzyme called well it's Dao what does that sign for again the excuse me um yeah diamine oxidase this is an enzyme that breaks down histamine I don't produce this enzyme myself I'm supposed to but I don't so I have to also take this with a pink drink so [ __ ] good Jesus Christ yeah today's the day of like Delights I was going to say Delights of the mouth but that does not sound we ate delicious food and now we're drinking delicious drink is what I'm trying to say how are you guys doing how's life we're um charging okay let's I'm going to get the game started now that I have now that I have uh some caffeine it hasn't kicked in yet but that's okay cuz we're going to there's a flow in my head um okay this game you have to move things around otherwise it's such an old game so it moves things on the monitors to the right so you have to arrange it in a specific way otherwise you can't see chat or OBS it's a whole thing where's my D drive there it is uh when a Vista games which doesn't exist anymore was bought by Disney uh Desperate Housewives and then you open it up and then you have to get rid of that and then the chat is here but it will move on its own to this monitor the vertical monitor chat Monitor and the game will be in the middle did I remember everything I think so oh no I didn't you guys can't see it oh wait but I uh did I do it right hey I'm not wearing green I could use my green screen that might be nice I'm sleepy still this will kick in and I will stop being sleep it is natural for one to develop a facade to influence how people perceive us it's okay that's just the intro thing that we've seen a million times the fly um it's very I know right I I don't even like I don't have any of the food normal food delivery apps on my phone because I don't order anything ever but I you can order through instacart now nowaday now recently I guess you can order like from restaurants and stuff on instacart so we use that um I just don't order stuff mostly because I half the time it has like cheese on it and I can't eat it like half the times they get the order wrong and it's full of things that I'm allergic to and it just happen so many times that I was like it's such a waste of money cuz it's too complicated the allergies are too complicated I have a milk protein allergy so it's like worse than lactose intolerance cuz you yeah the protein too it's a problem but people don't take that seriously because they think you're just lactose intolerant but I'm not just lactose intolerant and so um I mean I'm also lactose intolerant but like it means that people will like restaurants will sometimes say something is like dairyfree but it has butter in it you know like stuff like that happens or I say that because I can't have any kind of grains so like uh I can't have if there's like a sauce and they thickened it by putting corn starch in it I can't have that or if they sometimes you put like a just a little bit of flour in to thicken like a stew or something then I can't eat it but people are like it's such a small amount we're going to serve this to her anyway and just tell her that nothing's in it and um yeast is a big one because I'm really allergic to yeast and they put it in a lot of like spice mixes and like uh any kind of like pre-made sauce a lot of them have yeast uh in them and so I have to ask for that and they're like uh no it doesn't have yeast but it's like are you sure like everything I cook like a crazy amount like I probably cooked for myself yeah I as like since becoming an adult I've cooked like an obscene amount I just cook so much because I can't really eating out is just not really I don't know I would like to be able to eat stuff out but it's kind of stressful you know like I I live in a place with great Mexican food but like also I really hate getting sick after eating food you know what I mean it's like after you have those meals from the and they're good meals from restaurants like so many times for so many years it's like I'll just cook for myself yeah but it means I'm a good cook but um I I'm a damn good cook and I'm good at baking and stuff well I used to I don't really bake much anymore because I used to have uh fewer allergies and then baking was a little bit more doable nowadays not so much um that and my mom figured out the best uh the best grain-free flour mix by mixing multiple types of grain-free flour uh and then she died without telling me what it was but it and it was perfect like you could make stuff and it would it was like right but also then I developed a coconut flour like issue it's technically not an allergy it causes like debilitating intestin cramping and stuff like disastrous like this is just a like a a there's a percentage of people when they eat anything with coconut flour who have like a reaction where they have like insane like it's it's it's ugly it's ugly situation um so that I know that was in the mix because I didn't have this condition back then I developed it so even if she was alive like I guess I would still have to alter the flower mix but I still don't know where to start cuz she died so it's like I know I can't have sourdough because I can't eat yeast and sourdough has yeast in it um no but I used to there's like alternative flowers like almond flour um I can't have pseudo grains either so there are some grain things that are not actually grains they're seeds uh technically they're slightly different than grains um buckwheat sound it has the word wheat in it but it's not a grain it's a pseudo grain um same thing with like chia seeds and flax seeds my issue that causes me not to be able to have grains at all also the chemical that is in grains is also in pseudo grains so a lot of grain-free products they all have pseudo grains in them and so I can't have them even though they they're grainfree I still can't have them because they have pseudo grain in them um super complicated it's it's it's more it's so complicated so I don't bake anymore but I used to it like with garbanza like a combine flowers you know to make it work but yeah I used to bake a lot a lot a lot I used to make bomb zucchini bread cuz we have a little garden here and we always have too much like too many zucchinis too much squash too many melons too much like an obscene amount like that stuff grows like crazy here and uh so I'd always make zucchini bread so [ __ ] good yeah the worst one I think is rice I wish I could have rice because I love as like a variety of like Asian Foods and if I could have rice that'd be real nice you know to be able to like eat I'm I'm a little concerned about like traveling is there a reason that so so many food out um Lyme disease is the root cause uh I had Lyme dis I got Lyme disease when I was six years old but I wasn't diagnosed properly like actually until I was 21 and I was literally dying they were like you're going to die in six months you have six months left to live and then they figured out it was Lyme disease and so they were able to finally treat it but it had it had like like a lot of years like 15 years for the disease to just like take hold in my entire body and like make uh it not right like it affected every organ and like my brain like crazy like it did a lot of damage that is like permanent I still have it you know but um the point is one of the things it causes is it [ __ ] your immune system like crazy bad so so you can develop like I have mcast which is mass Cell Activation Syndrome uh and I have um uh histamine intolerance so that's the thing where you you just can't digest histamine there's histamine in literally every food like meat even has histamine I used to be allergic to meat I had like a like a year where I was allerg that was when I was dying where I was literally allergic I would have the most violently painful reactions to any kind of meat that wasn't Lobster or crab uh they were like feeding me Lobster like crazy to try to keep me alive which was a weird experience I'm like in my wheelchair I'm like all skeletal eating lobster um they probably thought it was like oh she's dying we're gonna give her give her good food before she dies no um bye kner sleeper um yeah I eat cauliflower rice but I would I would love to eat real rice yeah no but um yeah I eat lentils I can have lentils um cuz lentils technically are not greens um I can have lentils but yeah no I have like a a combination of conditions as a result of it and also I mean I'm not allergic to light anymore so that's nice that was pretty shitty um so I mean I've gotten better it actually has gotten a lot better it just also got worse it's kind of a combo things I got better with time like I got better part of it is I'm on anti-depressants you see which gives me like the ability to take better care of myself you know well would be Trend the magical drug although the wellburn has been causing a lot of issues with sleep I just toss and turn all night in like very like like a sleep and not deep at all it's like the lightest sleep so I don't it's awful and then I wake up at 5: in the morning and I can't sleep anymore yeah seriously well that's the thing they found a cure for lime disease um they found this this drug that that kills lime disease and a few other things and it it's actually starts with the I can't remember what it is but it's a drug that's existed for like a long time like 20 years that's a a deterrent for alcoholics so you take this medication and if you consume alcohol at all on this medication you like get real sick like throwing up like crazy like sick sick and it's it's taken by alcoholics as a deterrent like to like try to motivate them to not drink right turns out that drug kills Lyme disease this was all discovered because a Billionaire's wife got lime disease so of course we found something however so I've been on that drug right I they put me on it and I developed neurotoxicity neurotoxicity so I couldn't basically my brain did not tolerate it and I started having like contorted muscles again I have Donia because of the Lyme disease so like like where you can't control your muscles and it tends up weird and like you can't you know it's it's a whole thing neurotoxicity it was awful I can't remember the name of it I think there was a d it started with D I think this fly yeah I know exactly all we have to do to get cures for our conditions is infect millionaires I'm joking twist don't worry I'm not going to cough on any millionaires it's okay I'm not contagious I'm not contagious unless we do a blood transfusion and our blood mixes for like 19 hours or whatever no because I've been on doxy doxy is just an antibiotic it's a different one uh I'll look it up uh was it dulum dul no wait maybe it was let me find out [Music] um yeah yeah yeah okay yeah I think it was dul from um but yeah uh little fly yeah well so when I was grilling I I I let a bunch of flies in because I kept having to open the door and I had to leave it open to like keep an eye on the grill cu the weather shifted and I I didn't want it getting rained on um so yeah it's really annoying but I have I the the fly strip cylinder thing above my head is doing so well at catching them which is amazing for like a week There's Been not a single fly caught on that thing and suddenly there's so many it's amazing I'm very very pleased um they're all stuck there um but yeah I don't know just interesting but oh yeah lime disease doesn't transfer unless you um the blood of the person who has it and the blood of the person who doesn't have it have to mix first certain number of hours before it's it's like a whole thing like the tick has to stay on your body for a certain number of hours otherwise like if you take the tick off right away you won't get lime disease um you'll get other things but not Lyme disease I have the other things too so like the tick was in my case the tick was on my shoulder blade like I literally remember it as a kid my mom like burn it you know when you burn the needle with fire to try to like make it clean and then you get rid of like you kill the thing and then you try to pull its head out like you you get the tick and the head comes off but the head is still in your body so like clamped on so then they pull it anyway it's a whole thing tweezers in the bathtub as a six-year-old that's what I remember I just spilled all over myself but that's okay thank you uh I'm so happy with this okay all right okay what we're going to do is we're gonna make okay I'm going to uh be organized so hold on I'm going to do my lipstick again I still have the salt um real quick because oh no I don't really need to do much I figured it would have gone away from me drinking that uh anyway so I need to make a list I'm suppos I'm supposed to be playing video game but I'm kind of becoming a little stressed about um this trip to V so I need to um pack I need to make a list thank you um so I will take a piece of paper uh this one hopefully there's nothing scandalous on we're good okay wow okay um sorry my motor skills failed me okay so I leave on Wednesday wedes day I this will not type hold on why is everything difficult today um bar paper Okay Wednesday okay is when I fly right oh is this pen just dead oh maybe it's just dead [ __ ] balls nuts even another one uh okay when Wednesday I just need travel cloth okay Thursday rare Evo right is so Thursday's convention then there's Friday Also convention and then Saturday also convention and then I when do I fly back probably should know that [Music] um ah um oh I need to I need to change my well no okay Sunday okay so that's good Sunday okay I won't have access to laundry machines so I have to take two travel outfits I have two dresses so that would make good that make good travel dresses travel dress they're the same dress in different colors um okay every day has to have a casual outfit we probably there's probably going to be like dinner and stuff it's Vegas right so I need two outfits per day for three days the two travel days don't count because I'm not doing anything on those days other than traveling right uh so I need a dinner outfit and a regular outfit so I need six outfits total three casual outfits and three not casual outfits uh I'm going to bring the the the like wine colored sequin dress that I did a that I did that I posted earlier this week dress two part okay so I'll wear that sequiny dress for one of the days another day I can wear hold on I I pulled out things so I okay the funeral dress which isn't really a funeral dress it's black it's very modest but it makes the problem with modest clothing is that it makes me look curvier which isn't really a problem but it's also like people are like you should dress modestly don't show off your body when I dress modestly it makes your curves more like pronounced like if I wear a turtleneck I look like a cup size or two bigger like it's stupid people don't understand how tits work um point is the funeral dress is sexy but shows nothing um okay then I need one more fancy outfit part of the problem is that I've been having a little trouble CU I felt you know I biffed it yesterday sometimes my dystonia like my neuromuscular disease makes it difficult for me to walk in heels I used to be like amazing at walking in heels like amazing but it sometimes makes the muscles in my ankles like misfire like it doesn't work um so wearing like boots is a lot easier because then uh the ankle like has like a thing that's supporting it so even if the muscles give out it doesn't matter um but uh I agree flaunting it is just fine honestly you're only young once it's so silly like Someday my tits are going to be at my belly button I should enjoy them now I'm going to enjoy them then too but like I should enjoy them now you know what I mean like people are so so so weird about this sort of thing uh ours with the dogs yes I miss I miss dog walking too I live in an area where if you walk the dogs around my neighborhood you just get stickers like goathead stickers that are sharp hard things and they get stuck in the dog's Paws so I don't live and there's lots of crime so I don't live in a walkable Place unfortunately but I used to in Germany and I miss it okay so I need one more fancy outfit I have outfits that are moderately fancy but like I have a denim I have an ivory denim column dress that isn't really fancy but with the right accessories I could make it fancy I have uh I have another wine colored dress but that one's velvet uh I have uh long velvet black dress from my mom oh wait no velvet no velvet it's August it's August in Las Vegas and I am the kind of person I'm constantly melting I'm a polar bear it is always too hot for me no velvet um this would be a lot easier if if it was like winter you know what I mean um okay uh so I have various I think they're leisure suits but I don't know if they qualify as leisure suits they're place they're shiny they're beautiful but they're very so like I could wear one of those also the pants on that are very long so I have to wear Super H super tall heels if I wear those pantsuits I have four of them because I love them they're beautiful but I have to wear really high heels do I have high heel boots I could wear that are not like Brave boots you know what I mean like do I have high heeled boots that are fancy like a like you can wear with a dress I would much rather be cold than hot and I'm always hot sucks especially cuz I have to wear a mask and that traps so much heat it really [ __ ] [ __ ] up um okay hold on I'm opening up my app I have an app that I cataloged most of my wardrobe into um I'm just going to scroll a little bit wait okay I have a red sparkly that's not could I wear the red sparkly mini no I don't want I want to yeah I want to go less party and more like [Music] elegant I could wear I could wear I should also scroll on my Instagram because I post a lot of like all my reals are just me and outfits basically so I could I'm sure some of them are appropriate for this um I could do that's a fot costume but that would I mean maybe uh I have so many cow costumes like hot cow girl like not cowgirl cow girl moo outfits um uh let's see none of this works none of this none of this oh okay so there's this dress that red Spectre gave me that I love but I haven't worn it I've tried it on but I I I think I need to have it t like altered a little bit to fit me better because I feel like it it needs to like hug my shape a little bit better so I shouldn't wear that one but it's so pretty it's like satin I I could wear a sexy sheo costume I cannot wait to do that photo shoot sheo uh okay I could wear I could wear like full goth outfit that's always easy to kind of dress up or down you know what I mean I could wear a nun costume uh [ __ ] A lot of my stuff doesn't fit me right now so it's oh I could wear an 80s style power M like a power suit Mini dress I have two of those oh wait I have a black dress I was going to wear okay black dress black dress black long sleeve dress it is one post post oh but I also have my AVN dress o options oh my okay uh AVN dress what if I go somewhere fancy I'm going to put a question mark on that one um black black long sleeve dress sleeve dress that one's super plain but it looks nice I'll dress it up with like accessories I don't know um it's versatile uh okay looking looking looking what else okay so that's three fancy outfits then I need to have okay then I okay wait I need Spanx Spanx Spanx oh that one doesn't work well with spins actually the bottom is see-through uh thanks I'm just going to take the SPX anyway um and I always wear harnesses with stuff because it just makes it better it just elevates the look in a certain way you know what I mean like a little leather harness I really have like I have like a black black patent leather with Gold Hardware one so good so good okay for casual days I have one of my mom skirts that's like um I'll show it to you it's magnificent um okay so I probably read this top which is like a little smoked peasant top shirt this is inside out but this skirt maybe it's from the 90s and I could wear this with this maybe wait actually this doesn't have pink in it it has red [ __ ] okay a different top maybe I don't know but uh so part of the problem is that part of the problem is that so I'm I'm supporting a friend I'm going with a friend and they the book public book publishing company that he works for is uh I have shirts with the logo of the book company I should wear those at the convention right so here's the thing I don't wear pants like I don't do that I don't wear jeans my jeans wearing Days Are Over I decided I'm going to do I have free will I'm never wearing jeans again I own one pair I think the zipper's broken actually um I am anti- jees yes um but I also don't have any leggings that are appropriate to wear in public you know what I mean um so what does one wear with black Tech bro T-shirts um book t-shirt I have I also don't know how many I have of these shirts but let's say I have two so I have two I need to have two outfits to wear with shirts that have oh yeah because I have a read band books one and then I also have Okay so so I need two outfits for a convention what if I wore like a little like the little t-shirt and then I like tucked it under or whatever and wore it with like a like a like a pencil skirt sweatpants to say juicy on the booty I would too I'd wear it harmonically hello dka um French pedicure he'll pay just get a French Pedic um I do well French pedicure really interesting I've never gotten a French pedicure I mean a pedicure is plenty but not French um uh okay so yeah what do we think about okay but that leaves the problem of shoes because with a pencil skirt I can't just wear sneakers I have to wear heels right I don't want to walk around a Caesar's Palace conven thing with heels on all day and all night what if I wore like really like like stockings like tights I have these great boots that I really love that are like very like Punk but one of my feet is a size bigger than the other one so I I have I have a pair of boots one of them fits um and I wasn't willing to buy the other size of the same Boot and I now I'm regretting that cuz I would love to wear them because they look really cute and they would look great with all these outfits that I'm talking about what if I wore I have a jacket that has the company logo on it that doesn't really look good on me cuz it's a man jacket and I am not shaped like a man uh swap them at the store well I got them on Amazon so there's no getting away with it I [ __ ] wish I have uh six pairs of heels that are three pairs actually because I had to get each type of pair like each pair of heels had to be bought twice so that I would have one for each I need to like you know how like amputees will buy shoes on eBay uh for the leg that they have I need to do that yeah it's really annoying it's a problem I got them on sale though clearance so there's that I guess um but it is a problem okay okay so if I can't so what goes with with that my pants don't fit they're not stretchy like my pants that are like joggers they're not stretchy they're like cargo joggers so I pack them all away somewhere in the garage or something because they weren't stretchy and I hated them I could wear Harum pants that I don't feel terribly confident in cuz I my thighs tore massive holes into the last pair uh what goes with what goes with t-shirts black t-shirts tutu I do have a tutu um okay I'm going to look for Bottoms in my app specifically botoms uh let's say well I'm just going to apply that filter and not like okay not like squirt or whatever wait okay cuz I have like a black acid wash I have like shorts that are tiny like tiny that's not [Music] appropriate that's not appropriate none of this is appropriate [Music] I have clown shorts they're all roughly uh I have long lots of long skirts with two two um two slits down the front but also not appropriate for with t-shirts it doesn't really work I don't know maybe like cropping it and then wearing like a mini skirt is going to be the best route with tights the Flies are driving me crazy uh I do have some no that definitely wouldn't work I have ah how do you say this word aha I don't know how to say that you know the face I have shorts with that all over it they don't fit they fit kind of but my butt is too big for them I have a whole outfit of that specifically because like six years ago I don't know it was a very long time ago I took like two photos wearing an outfit of wearing that I don't know I don't remember why it was not great um yeah I have a variety of mini skirts that I guess I could put on with tights the tight yeah tights let me look at my shoes real quick I'll be right back I'm going to see if I have any boots that forget e [Music] um I have doc Martin's that I haven't water treated yet I need to do something to the leather but there's probably not time but it's probably not going to rain but also I probably should do something but the problem with the dog Martins is that they I'm look at me in my good posture they're they're hot my feet get so hot hot and Las Vegas in August my feet get so [ __ ] hot like I wore them I W wore the doc Martins twitchcon and I was just melting I also have like white sneakers like Air Force Ones or whatever um but they're all like I hate leather Sho I love leather shoes I hate leather shoes because they're always so [ __ ] hot um I have some some sandals that are white that are like platform but like little platform they did the soul came off completely when I went to a conference with for this company actually like a crypto related technology publishing conference did I go to Vegas in March I can't remember that far back um yeah Vegas is fun it I definitely am very tired I I'm kind of at the point where I need like a month if I could just spent like a month completely alone at a in a lighthouse with the waves crashing I could like rest I'm so tired get oh that sounds great I did so I did fix the shoes that broke with shugu but I it was one that broke I think the other one is breaking so I need to tear It O open and then put shugu and to pre L because otherwise I'll be in Vegas and so I do have white sandals which would work white sandals but the white sandals don't really work with well what would I wear them with with t-shirts cuz the problem is that if I'm wearing something that has my legs out um I wear tights because I have massive thighs that will rub together and don't really go with with the open toe shugu is like a thick clear uh it comes in a tube it's a it's a glue that you can use for shoe repair specifically is what it's made for the cha thing is unreal uh roet rise oh God I believe it I've been to New York in the winter too and yeah cities are expensive yeah I just just need like a month by myself with the waves crashing so good um yeah shugu is great it's really really really good um what do I so normally when I'm at home I wear tiny little booty shorts thigh eyes and no shoes I never wear shoes uh but that's when I wear t-shirt t-shirts right I wear t-shirts cuz I'm what about uh okay what about what if I've oh no I've definitely not gotten skinnier the pants will not fit that's delusion the pants will not [Music] fit pants would be very cute if they fit and technically I can fit into them but they have no stretch and it's very uncomfortable um it's not pleasant but I could technically do that cargo pants jogger style cargo pants they're cute they're like militant lesbian core militant bisexual core because it's me you know except I'm also not militant but they have that Vibe because if I wear them with like boots like my my doc Martins I look I look a certain way um yeah Comfort is best nothing is comfortable I just want to be barefoot that's not an option um I have dresses that like sundresses how about my um I'm going to for the third day I'll take oh I'll take long dress long beige dress with black flowers flowers yeah that's good that's technically kind of fancy but like I wore it to a fancy dinner with billionaires and stuff but I feel like I could also wear it casually I the point like the thing with like anything related to like Tech Bros I don't like this is like a thing for crypto nerds which I don't say that like it's not derogatory you know but um I I stick out like a sore thumb a little bit because I don't I like wear bright colors or light colors and I'm I'm just not it's just a see of black t-shirts you know what I mean like um uh am I picking with dress color not really no uh okay so like I don't even so I don't really bother at all with trying to like trying to blend in like at all I don't bother because it there's no point like I stick out like a sore thumb um it's there's no point like even if I tried it wouldn't really work um I just embrace it but uh part of that is probably from the not wearing jeans thing so that I'm just wearing like dresses I'm wearing like a yellow dress and a sea of black t-shirts you know it's very you know um 9in Nails concert I wish um no it's going to be fun I there's some cool people I'm friends with going um there's a really lot of really cool people going and I want to support the company by wearing the t-shirts but I got to wear something on the bottom half it's really hard what if I pull out the pants and try them on what if I measure my gut and see if I have gut and skinnier magically I haven't I'm on birth control that makes you gain weight I have not gotten skinnier there's no [ __ ] way what if I wear I wish I owned like a pair of slacks that' be so nice I don't own any slacks because I don't leave my house in enough to justify it uh and I'm not going to wear them around my house okay what if I wear what if I wear hoping that thoughts will come to me if I say that repeatedly I'm thinking about if there there's any clothes that my mom left me well she left me all of her clothes but if I have any of her clothes that fit me other than that skirt that I could wear what if I gave up I'm trying to match I could try on the pair of jeans the zipper might be broken though I could try it on they look bad on me it's not a good look and they're so uncomfortable they're so uncomfortable uh I know it's just I can't think of something that happens I wish I had some bell bottoms that'd be fun I be super fun uh okay hold on I'm going to real quick Wander over there maybe find something and put it on I don't know e okay I have some things so first of all before I try wearing it at this B without I should try on the jacket again I really like their logo which is really but it is this is like a jacket that is shaped for boys you know what I mean like uh it ain't shaped like me but it's still very cute and I really like it um so this is my a so I have this for warmth I probably will not need it because um I I won't I'm a polar bear I will need air conditioning I will not need a jacket the only problem with it is that it's not shaped like a girl so my butt is too big I can't zip it uh at the bottom unless I lift it like I put it like I have it up what's that do I still have a tag on it oh I should probably take that off um I I never get to wear jackets here because I'm never cold that's why I haven't worn it CU I'm never cold because I live in the desert I mean I get cold at night but I would get cold if I was thinner and like so like this is will be me this is a tech proo fit not the bottom bit but like the this is Tech proo from here up right I would just LIF it because nobody got uh time for that okay so all right I can wear this that's good then I'll pack this in case somehow I get cold it could happen I guess um okay so that goes in the pile of things that are coming okay so then the problem is so I have T-shirts right they're very cute I really like them I have one that says read band books so I'm going to wear that one too I'm going to try on the jeans and it's going to suck and I'm going to hate it and I'm going to complain about it and I'm wearing it I'm going to put it on over the shorts because I don't care and also I just pulled that down my compression stockings can just hang out down there you know uh they can hang out down there is the wait is the zipper broken I feel like that's kind of important or will it break the first time I sit down I hate them it's I only on one pair E I hate it it's strangling my [Music] leg it's strangling my leg I need less dress okay these are shorts twitch it's part of the other outfit I'm putting on jeans over shorts don't worry so they suck I look weird and bad and I hate it and I hate it so [ __ ] much um yeah no I can't do it I I despise it with such a [ __ ] passion such a supreme fashion like I just just hate it so much okay so then there's this option which is a little bit risky where I could I could put on like full tights that are like slightly safer but not and then I could wear like shorts that hopefully don't have ass hanging out we're going to find out I don't think my ass will hang out oh my God can I get it over that ass H thank you it makes me feel like I'm in high school you know what I mean uh oh wearing jeans makes me feel like I'm in high school and it's just such a gross feeling like truly while okay okay so I washed these recently these are my stretchy jeans but they're clearly not stretching very much right now um okay so I could wear like tight it's like almost opaque tights or medium opacity tights with this but I feel like even though my ass is not out it's too much like to be showing at an event like this you know what I mean this isn't like a convention for cosplay and stuff I feel like it's just too much to show um uh okay so that was not successful uh f um [ __ ] balls [ __ ] uh okay what if I buy pants I don't think I can buy pants in stores necessarily I could actually actually we have a mall I have not been to the mall in like years I don't do that I shop online cuz most stores don't carry My Size because I'm a giant um but um I could technically go to Torrid at the mall if it still exists I don't know businesses close here a lot uh and I could buy overpriced pants I really don't want to do that thank you well the only problem is trying to wear um a t specic like I'm wearing t-shirts to support a company uh uh and I don't normally wear like I just it's it's just a m like I have a lot of really cute outfits that are appropriate that I could wear but if I want to wear these t-shirts that's the problem I could give in a kn wear the t-shirts but like I would rather wear the t-shirts you know like I would rather wear them okay hold on I'm going I'm going to T's website and I'm doing it on here because I don't want twitch to ban me if there's a a woman in her under Underpants T joggers cargo joggers I just want to look like I could be in the rebellion in like the last of us or something I can be rebelling against the [ __ ] who are what are they called I can't remember you know the dudes so many clothes I have a lot of clothes too I'm getting rid of a bunch of mine which is nice uh uh those will those look like sweatpants like I don't want to wear stuff that looks like sweat pants you know what I mean no it has to be we have a Mor rees's at the mall too we have two stores that's not true we have a few stores I think we have a I have not been to the mall in many years I don't want to go there but I could in theory tomorrow go there I used to love going to the mall because it was air conditioned and there was people watching and I was in high school but um no I would prefer not to okay nope it just looks like sweatpants and it only comes in an extra large that's not really going to work my dude wait do you come in big size size chart size [Music] chart my butt is bigger my waist is smaller my butt is bigger so it might be tight on the butt so I could probably do that if there's stretch in the material is this in my store select store hold on we're finding out okay yes yes that is my store that's the Mal okay the you can get them in long I don't well I'm just going to get regular okay plus wait wait do they have different sizes for plus is it like a different category oh it's different they have us cordoned off uh those look like they're not shaped for a person who's shaped like me but it could work uh let's look at the plus-size size chart which is apparently a different size chart um no well what oh no oh okay so the difference between the Plus Sizes is that the waist is bigger I mean that makes sense but like the everything else is the same CU people tend to have more weight around the middle right but I don't have that because I have lipos suction for medical reasons that's is a long story we talked about the the other day I'm not repeating myself again oh I going have Sneed I going have seed oh my God that was the loudest sneeze the loudest is hello hi um msia Valley Mall is like a graveyard it seems like we still have at least a Maurice's it is like a graveyard all the like a lot of the I mean last time I went which was like a year ago like so many stores were closed it was a lot like a lot it's probably worse now there's one dedicated uh store for big people but it's overpriced for one thing and um there are certain things when you're a big that um companies are like ah you're a fat person therefore you must be ashamed of your body we're going to give you so many flutter sleeves you're never going to have to let anyone see your ugly fat arms like there's all these like things that happen in plus-size fashion that plus-size people don't really like very much but companies think that they've decided that are flattering on on like fat people but they're like are there's nothing wrong with our arms like why do we need to hide them with these like it's very silly uh and there's certain things like like they think that that having specific like types of patterns in the fabric it will hide that you're fat it'll hide any kind of like rolls or anything and it's like I could wear a solid dress I could wear something with a different type of pattern it doesn't need to be that like like it's like there's nothing to hide no one's going to think you're skinny like like me when people see me in person no one's going to think I'm skinny and that's a okay like that's not a bad thing cuz I'm not skinny I don't have to try to look skinny you know um like it's all very very stupid handy um okay if I buy this and then I buy it in Black which is like really not black it's charcoal I'm going to add to back what if I just it says it's in stock right I'll just go to the store okay wait hold on let me look at what other pants they have I'll just go to the store tomorrow yeah I'll just go to the store tomorrow it'll be fine uh um um um um um um how about I would wear jeans if they were like stretchy and also like like wide leg jeans but uh it kind of looks like their definition of wide leg jeans it's super tight on top and then flaring out from like the lower hip which is not how that's supposed to go not shaped like a plus-sized person they're shaping they're just like I don't know it's very it's people are bad at making clothing for bigger people and I get part of it is that there's a lot of variety in body shapes especially as as you get larger but like you can tell when only skinny people worked on a project like worked on a collection you know what I mean you can tell like uh surely you know a fat person doesn't want to show their hideous fat arms but they want to feel sexy so we'll give them a cutout shoulder and PE people can see their shoulder which is inoffensive and doesn't have fat on it so they'll feel sexy and but like they can cover the fat like that's the thinking and a lot of plus-sized clothing that is not made by plus-sized people you know what I mean it's I have a lot of feelings and thoughts and so do a lot of other people my size um it's ridiculous uh okay give me pants give me pants uh I don't no you don't have any jeans that are at all wearable they're hideous and awful and I would and I just can't bottoms [Music] pants hi how's it going I should start I someday if I'm ever super rich I will start a clothing with the brand it'll be super fun I used to dream of that perhaps I mean I dreamed of many things you know but that was one of them as a kid yeah exactly exactly it's like a lot of what big people want is the same styles that smaller people have just bigger so they actually fit but but all these brands are like no a fat person couldn't possibly be okay with people seeing that they're fat they couldn't possibly want to be actually sexy not in a not at all they can't possibly want to wear something formfitting that like it's all really really really awful and overpriced so it's just uh there's feelings oh Jesus high waters what if I wore some camo camo tapered pant no thank you not for me what if I wore a pink linen high-rise cargo wide leg pant L it's just wrinkled and that doesn't go with a T-shirt oh God they can't wear that with a t-shirt that's not t-shirt plus-size Weekender drawstring cargo pant I'm looking for something that isn't basically pants I think that one that I found at first that's the cargo one is the closest to being real pants what if I buy a pair of slacks they will not fit they will not fit there's no way I will have to have them altered and there's no time for that so but I could try oh yes stretchy pants oh I mean I want stretchy pants but not like a floral pattern to hide that I to try to hide that I'm fat it's like Know believe it or not we all don't all hate ourselves anyway um I wish I could wear I wish I didn't have as much like I wish my thighs didn't rub together as much because I can't wear short I have to wear shorts that are really short which I like but like for something like this if I could just wear like slightly longer shorts it would work great but my thighs rub together so much that if this if the end of the shorts like the head hem is there it's hell and also it'll just move up so then my shorts will be like the middle hem is at the crotch and then the sides it's it's just not good it's not good [Music] um okay a lot of these pants are not good why would anyone want like Jesus Christ why why would anyone want that no one wants that oh my God am I really going to have to go to the mall [Music] tomorrow let me look at the camo ones I guess oh yeah I'm sure I'm sure yes a thing I actually saw someone complaining about that the other day yeah they like that there's limited so much limited sizing in men's sizes too I don't rise up yeah the middle seem like the thighs will rub it so much that it will rise up to try to like be away from where the rubbing is and then you end up with like the outside shorts being it's really ugly uh it's it's it's bad um okay these cargo pants would look good with a black T-shirt the um okay so I'll do these and what size what size um my butt is like 50 in so I oh God the waist is so much bigger on these pants though [ __ ] um that's the problem okay what if I got a size 20 and I just dealt with they have a drawring it can't be that bad they can't be that well let me look at the other sizing scheme the thighs are probably too small on the regular sized one uh okay extra large extra extra large the waist would technically work the hip is too small but if it's stretchy but if the hip is too small the the thighs are going to be too small so I just have to deal with it being too big around my waist and I'll just hope the drawstring functions like a drawstring and yeah that'll work okay pants 2x which is 20 20 and 22 apparently 2x covers both 20 and 22 um okay we're going to get regular because uh I don't uh yeah it'll be good and then I'll wear then I'll have I can wear wear sneakers with these like normal sneakers at to back okay so then then I have that and also the other one which is the wait except it's not in my cart the other one is wait is that at the store do they have this at the store is it available where's the other pants that are similar but different that also I will get in a 20 2X and Tall clothing Indy soda yeah sizing is [ __ ] insane the sizing is so inconsistent I can wear like a medium shirt if I feel like it but like around my house I'll wear like a 6X cuz I don't want it being constricting around like without a broad I want no constriction anywhere um I just don't want any touching me um big t-shirt forever big t-shirt gang forever um but it means I can share clothes with a lot of friends because a lot of girl clothing is stretchy uh okay pants go back to the pants please pants there was a pair of pants that uh I no those are also fancy I I would have to wear [ __ ] heels with those pants I don't want to wear heels with pants I'm trying to wait with the linen pants I could wear sandals though which would make my legs not feel super hot or my feet not feel super hot and that's kind of the issue is that I melt I'm like I have the heat tolerance of a polar bear these don't look that wrinkly actually maybe the linen ones would be okay actually plus size they only have 14 16 or 22 they don't have 20 what size what size ma'am 22 oh oh that would work on my butt but my waist is like 8 Ines smaller than that is that going to work uh it's got a drawring maybe it'll work and they're pink let's add it let's find out whether this stuff is available in my oh it's already it's still in my bag I didn't realize okay there are three pairs of pants in my bag I really do need to have some pants you know it is kind of a thing that you should probably have and I am on birth control that makes me gain weight so like and I'm not going to come off that birth control because that [ __ ] is working not on it for controlling birth I'm on it so I don't have a period at all like at all um and so far it's working so I would like to keep being on that um which just means I have to put up with my pants not fitting okay here's the question are they available being very ambiguous about whether it's Avail available are you guys at my store or do you not have fat people clothes at the store CU that does happen no [ __ ] are you guys really not available in my store wait are none of these pants available but why why though you don't have at store after all you just don't have them at store the store you only have Shi to home or ship to store none of those will work okay what if I go to like JC Penney I think our JC Penney still exists I I'll go to the mall tomorrow it'll be a whole it'll be a thing I've I haven't been to the mall in many years or a year at least I can't remember I think I went like a few years ago like three years ago with my brother and my sister and like their spouses and the kids because there was briefly like uh you know those like big inflatable like Moon houses Moon bounces and stuff like those kinds of things there was like a place inside the mall that had a bunch of that for the kids to play with years ago the one about just finished watching oh really about the GameStop stock Fiasco I bet was it good though um 2x extra tall for me please but can't find them cheap yeah everything's so expensive if you're not a common size it's very frustrating uh okay tomorrow mall I will report back I will report back on what I will find and then I'll have pants and I'll wear them in public and be very like reasonable with my and then I'll be able to wear the t-shirts that for the company that I like there we go problem solved yes so good problem solved and then I can wear depending on what kind of shoes they are if they're linen like wideleg linen then I can wear sandals perfect is I don't really want a bunch of people looking at my feet people are weird about that sometimes uh yeah but I could wear then I won't my feet won't get hot and if they're just regular shoes then I can wear or regular pants I can just wear my sneakers and I won't fall over my feet will be hot but I won't fall over problem solved and then also yeah that'll be good tomorrow pants it's happening just you watch I'm going to be so presentable that's the problem I just how do I like I don't know um yeah was it it was funny hell yeah it sounds sounds like good you know it's a good topic to make something like that about you know what I mean I know look at me being an adult buying pants [ __ ] pants I will will not buy jeans though it simply will not happen there's no chance in hell that I will buy a pair of jeans hate it never never again actually okay there's a company in Australia that makes jeans specifically there's this company in Australia that makes jeans specifically for uh people with like smaller waist to hip ratio and like thigh big big thick thighs big ass uh and hips and then smaller waist and they have some beautiful jeans but they're like $170 and also they have to ship them from Australia so it's like hydrate I will do that oh Pete Davidson was in it oh that I mean that makes sense cool that's funny um yeah $170 for a pair of jeans is a lot especially since even though the material appears to be pretty darn thick it my thighs will still destroy them if I wear them consistently I won't wear them consistently actually you know what because I don't wear jeans hardly ever only occasionally on extremely rare occasion they probably would last many years like forever because like my my thighs by the rubbing alone have destroyed like just straight up put holes in so many like jeans pants like a lot of things tights like a lot of things like I got a lot going on with the thighs um I've been to Disney World Paris but of the American ones uh so oh um hey yeah I tend to um wait Tetris is it a Oh by okay yeah yeah it all makes sense I all make I feel like I've seen that but maybe I've seen a different one about Tetris like just a little thing my grandpa used to have a Game Boy Color and for like 20 years or some [ __ ] if you're at his house he'd be sitting in his chair playing Tetris with the sound off you'd have like any conversation you have with my grandpa at his house he's playing Tetris the whole time like it was just what he did and um while doing anything like that didn't involve like woodworking or whatever um so love Tetris love this song osma I might be saying that wrong is a band that does a the Tet well I know the Tetris song is for like a Russian folk song or something but they do uh ciki I don't know how to say that um that's my best try at the name of it and it's a great song um that's like a metal version of the Tetris theme song basically it's really good uh how's it going it's going well we're making a list of things I need to pack for my trip to okay panties socks uh B white backpack yes oh which works with the sandals what am I going to do if I'm uh I used to be able to wear fanny packs but my like I gained weight and my boobs are bigger and now I can't see them like if I'm wearing a fanny pack and I look down to try to see like to get into the fanny pack I can't I can't see it all I see is boobs so it's become kind of a problem because I have a fanny pack collection because I love fanny packs uh bllac Fanny maybe I could just do it anyway pack I'll just put a question mark um yeah it's like a it's like an issue thank you um the boob give it giveth the boob take it it's true um a week worth of packing oh my God that's a lot of packing wow that's a lot of packing that's not a problem that's it is a problem when I'm like I'm like at the airport some ladies like or I'm at a store and I'm like trying to just by feeling alone feel for what I'm trying to get and she's just looking at me like and I'm just like if I look down I'm just looking at tits but like and then me trying to explain awkward I can't really see but like I can't explain that because I'm then I'm just saying hey I have massive boobies um I can't say no that's not appropriate so I just have to be awkward as my back always bad but I have double scoliosis so like even if I had little boobs if I was flat it would probably also still be bad double scoliosis um I got a pillow Cube the long kind of pillow cube pillow rectangle is and it it's very very good for sleep it's actually quite good I do not have implants nature bless me both with the scoliosis and the boobs um anyway uh no if there were fake well first of all I wouldn't get fake boobs when I was much younger I like wanted to but I knew it would be a bad idea and so I didn't and then they grew right so like I don't need them but like before they came I wanted them but I was like no they make people sick and that's the problem is that implants like a lot of people who get implants have to have them removed because they having a foreign body like big foreign bodies in your body makes your immune system go like crazy and then you get really sick um and then you have to have them removed and it's all like like I don't know I'm glad because and I already have Lyme disease so like I wouldn't be a candidate anyway like that wouldn't be possible anyway so I'm happy that I grew my own so that I didn't have to be like a I wish I had boobs but I can't cuz lime disease but um just wear the Fanning pack up here yeah I mean I would be able to see it in theory um [Music] CLA [ __ ] off to Virginia for the next chapter how exciting well I hope it goes super [ __ ] well that is a big deal it's a big change I hope it goes so smoothly yeah that's the problem is that like there are so many conditions that happen because of people having breast implants and it's really frustrating because uh boobs are great and it's like God damn it why do good good things have to cause bad things you know I like them I wish I like like I I like I don't know I like looking at pretty girls with big boobs I don't care if they have implants or not but I worry about their health you know what I mean like I tell all my friends who have considered boob jobs I'm like girl I've talked to some plastic surgeons and like like done a lot of research and know a lot of [ __ ] and I've talked to a lot of doctors look it up you don't this is bad for you get fat transfer if you needs if you want something done I don't know uh yeah anyway yeah I agree appreciate what you've got there are people out there who are jealous of you regardless of what size you are I always forget that I have that emote man that's [ __ ] funny um sandals uh [Music] sandles sneakers which high heels should I take uh the [ __ ] with the black dress the red pumps work wet best um there is with the AVN dress if I wear that one it depends on like how nice the place we're going we go to is I don't know if we're even going to go anywhere worth wearing Sparkles too but um black heels uh the funeral dress also looks best with red heels red cuz it's fully black ah uh and then the wine dress that I wore that one looks best with the black heels okay so if I just take the red heels the black heels the white sandal and the white sneakers uh yeah yeah um it's a fact uh that happens sometimes [Music] um is it comfortable that way no it's also in back like there's hair back there um it's just kind of chaos today because I just washed it this morning and I just let it do what it wants and I have I'm not standing up super straight but either way like it wants I just let it be wherever it wants like like I'll [ __ ] with it and like stick it like that it'll I don't know it's just whatever it does whatever it wants um so it's not really on purpose like when I am like doing a reel and I know that it's going to be only from the front like if I'm recording only from the front I'll put it all forward because then you can control the shape a little bit better and it looks like Fuller um uh that's like normal to do if you're recording something only from the front everyone does it um but then if you turn around you got that going on which I am not super into uh as for hair at this event mostly down hair of course uh chaos hair I could do old timey I could bring some Pomade and do old timey L like long old timey hair for with the like wine colored sparkly dress ooh uh jewelry I need mostly gold do you have any commands for I streams I do but I can never I'm Inc capable of remembering them I I thought it was follow age but apparently not because I really thought it was follow age but you tried that um so I don't really know what's going on uh with that because I could have sworn that's it um yeah so the thing is I don't know why it's not working if it's just the wrong command and I just don't remember properly there are two flies on me and it's driving me up the wall they're so annoying um yeah okay so I'll do that I'll wear t-shirts that'll be good uh sunscreen so much sunscreen I mean it's in the event I'm staying in Caesar's Palace and that's also where the convention is so like I don't really think I'll be leaving that much and I mean I'll go to Thrift the the fabric store I actually haven't looked up where that is I don't know if it's far away uh are my M my mods have never come to my house and paid for everything that has never happened I had uh are you talk I had a I can't talk about the one person I had who did that occasionally and didn't pay for everything just gave me money and cleaned um but I can't talk about that and that was only occasionally so I don't know what you're talking about but it's probably not about me um maybe my did my thing turn off no that that wouldn't work why is my [ __ ] not working I don't know why it's not working I don't [ __ ] know who knows um I play lot I stream a lot of games um we just didn't stream games today because I realized I had to pack and I got stressed about it mod pot luck can you imagine um like my mods do enough they don't need to pay for everything like are you kidding they do so much I would not ask that of them um thank you I um okay so we pretty much if I go to the mall tomorrow I don't want to do it but if I do that then I will have pants and then I can wear t-shirts Maul I'm just putting Maul pants Maul pants really big letters small pants and then I'll have um I think it's really funny when people can they come in here and they're like I'm going to figure out what she's insecure about hm what do I not like about her appearance I'm going to pick this thing this is something that people are often uh like insecure about I bet she's insecure about that like dude look I'll show you from the side it's big it's beautiful it's bigger than your dick um yeah I get so much political spam it's really irritating so much political spam Jesus it never ends hold on I have to sendex uh here we go I know my nose is good that's the thing is like a big nose is not a bad thing like it is big but it's also beautiful like it's really wild um Mall pants I'm going to go buy pants at the mall I really don't want to but I'm going to do it I hate that I really don't want to do that [ __ ] I hate this town I don't hate this town well I don't hate this town I just don't belong here I don't hate this town at all I just don't belong here um right yeah no it's just very funny um very very funny um okay let's see [Music] um okay okay we've accomplished a list oh I have to also take pajamas to sleep in sleep T-shirt and pants I'm G to have to take a big suitcase after all okay and socks I know I occasionally sleep sleeping sucks sometimes I can't sleep without them sometimes I can't sleep with them it's very I'm very inconsistent okay um so we've accomplished some goals this is good we've made a list panties panties [Music] socks panties and socks the strapless bras uh okay regular Bros too uh wow that is Sur sural you've spent so much time so much time like just at work at that place like that's wild I hope your last shift is super good like fantastic you got a big life change coming um yeah um seriously well yeah that's how it is is people love misery like people no misery loves company people hate to see others happy when they themselves are not happy and there's such a deep self-loathing that people have that causes them to like be shitty you know um it comes from such a place of profound self-loathing uh it makes me feel bad for him almost not quite I'm too vengeful um uh okay uh I bet my I bet my bot is no longer working I think my streamlabs I don't have stream elements I think my streamlabs is not working I think my bot detached itself that's okay I'm going to end now anyway don't go anywhere you have to stay so that you can go with the raid so the numberers higher so that I look cooler the Flies man there's a lot on that thing above I kind of want to show you but I don't want to get sticky on me and I don't trust myself not to do not to [ __ ] it up all right let's see let's do [Music] uh can I find someone [Music] to let's do this okay we're g to raid someone I got ah who I I don't really know what they're doing but I met them at twitchcon they were really nice um I don't know what they're doing currently on their thing yeah Summer's almost over I'm actually I'm bummed because I was sick for like a lot of summer so I didn't get to do as much fun summer stuff but I'm just going to keep doing it into fall you'll see me grilling and hot tubbing into fall being stick sucked for so much of Summer that's what I get for going to Indiana I'm never doing that again I mean I am I will never go to Indiana in June again because it's the it's just too two packed there's just too many people and there's too too many I'm just not my meme system is not strong enough um so never in June but maybe in the winter when no one wants to go to Indiana I could go to Indiana that'd be nice uh yeah I've been I've been live for a while um guys uh I have Great Links check out them links I post a lot of places a lot of things you should check out them links wow links amazing um help me purchase meat to to smoke in my smoker so much so much meat I do want to make another brisket oh it went through yes boys want it though