we see Jen's ex come back Matt um and you're one of none of the guys are happy you're one of the guys like if he stays I think I'm out would you is that was that real is that really how you felt oh oh yeah um and that was a that was a moment that I don't think um I think that was in one of the moments where I didn't really I like to say I think through a lot of the things that I'm going to say versus just spewing them out that was really just pure emotion for me like I I've done I've played X Games before you know it's it's been a theme in my life in the past and for me in in my mind to have the strength to turn all that away i' I've turned a new chapter in my life and and I'm putting it all out there for this woman that I want to see uh where it could go and we just had an amazing one-on-one dat so it was personal for me you know those feelings were personal I just told her I was falling for her all of these new veloping budding emotions that I'm you know experiencing and then the hammer drops you know some guy that dated her in the past could just take her away and and that could be that because I know how I know how easy it is to fall into that feeling of comfortability with like a ex partner yeah so that that struck me you know in a very emotional way you know I wasn't happy um but do you think you would you think if he stayed you would have actually left or you think you would have talked your you think oh no I would I would have left yeah really okay because again I'm not I'm not I'm not one to judge again I've said it this whole time I'm not one to judge people for how they are and and what they want in life but I can choose to make myself not a part of that you know that that's the control that I have and if if if that means so much to you then I support you but I can't be here with you on that Journey