SNL, Side Hustles and Molly Kearney - That's What I Heard #52

here we go let's get these questions from the [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] DMS all right well that's what I heard so what do you want to tell you take me down the road that's a little bit of winding come on to a place St still put sugar in the r tea I thought it oh yeah I I don't know song lyrics like at all like I love driving to music but it's like I'm just yelling in the wind yeah ladies and gentlemen of the that's what I heard audience please show some [ __ ] respect I hope you're wearing a suit at home cuz we got a big one brother okay one of my favorite people has joined us in the studio please welcome Molly Carney it's Carney actually that's embarrassing Molly Carney it's Carney I got one of my favorite people my best friends on the earth someone I know better than any living human Molly KY it's Carney it's Carney welcome bro it's an honor to be here guys so cool summer I'm on top of the world do you feel on okay so you uh spoiler alert Molly is on SNL okay it's true huge now you just got summer break though we did we just started summer break we just had uh Jake jolen hall close out the season yeah good guy awesome guy guy he got us these like massage chair things that was wild he like he brought in for the crew but it looks like a camping chair and then there's these like vibrating circles and for 5 minutes and you close your eyes and they it's like noise cancelling headphones and he just brought them in to be like a stud just to be a nice guy that's nice you know relax a little now what's your Vibe going into this summer first of all is this your first summer with a little coin with a little money absolutely okay so this is a whole Newall game technically it's my second summer but last summer was strike so did you not have a little yeah last summer I was like what am I going to do will I ever work again my phone ever ring again will my phone ever ring again will I be booked yeah but yeah this is my first summer where I'm like I'm good for for the first time in my life there's got to be a little bit of a feeling where you go wow I could just get a plane ticket and do whatever the [ __ ] I want this summer absolutely but I'm also like I still act like I don't have any money now why is that no I I was drinking with you one night and you tipped $100 for no reason have problem if I have a couple drinks and I'm cuz I worked in the surfice industry for like 10 to 12 years almost longer like since I was 18 so I know what it feels like to get a good juicy tip from somebody that you're not expecting somebody looked at me like look at this lesbo freak isn't going to give me a dime and I'm like $100 sis $100 Kate I think her name is Kate it was Kate a and then I just turned to you I go you own this bar now and we were drinking like Miller lights and yeah I mean we had what 17 to 25 tequila sodas absolutely we we tried to do like gossip but we could not get through a single topic it was so absurd like we did not accomplish one complete sentence of gossip and it was 7 hours long but boy did we have fun but boy was at a good nap well I saw you it was like seeing like like an old sibling that I only saw in the womb and which was A League of Their Own right well let's yeah we'll explain to the audience me and Molly are friends from the famous League of Their Own now you just you just showed up there out of [ __ ] nowhere and you were gone as quick as you can dude I was in Pittsburgh for 8 weeks no you weren't yeah huh no you weren't I was there for I think I worked 6 days and they and it was 8 weeks long so I would drive home to Cleveland you would drive home I was going to I was going to say I didn't we didn't do eight weeks worth of hanging I don't think no maybe it was six weeks it was it was my first time on set like I remember Jamie was like okay well you're you're in this scene and you know here you go yeah yeah and my first line I just started talking when they were like and are we good are we rolling and I was like yep and then I just started talking and then Abby's like someone was like you you actually have to wait till they say action and I was like well where do you there's no freaking rule book for this I looked I looked for a book online teach me what to do when I get on set yeah I I know dude well I already I was lucky that I already knew kind of how set worked but I sure [ __ ] didn't know how like acting worked cuz you know it from from being a PA so I like understood the absolute useless side of it to me at that point so like I remember the first time I had to say a line they were like was it was okay we were like we were we had to be waiting online for the telephone oh yeah and um they were like all right fck say something like uh who she who she on the phone with the president so I go a who she on the phone with the president and then I just hear cut cut no I I I who's she on the phone with the president like I was like my face turned red I was like that could didn't and then and then yeah then I like didn't totally understand anything so we were supposed to be um angry right yeah but I didn't get that so I kept like smiling like laughing at the girl who was angry and then they go cut FX why are you smiling I was like oh because she's so angry that it's funny to me no no you're supposed to be acting like you're also angry oh okay I'm also angry got it of course of course and then the other thing that would throw me off of acting is um Everybody cuz we had all those scenes where we're like a group right right and then so they would call rolling and then everybody would start their acting so they would start being a little playful with each other right they'd be like yeah you know whatever like that 40 [ __ ] and then I'd be like why is everyone being weird all of a sudden and I didn't even realize like that's what you're supposed to do so that when they call Action you're already in it right cuz they would start does that make sense no that absolutely is I've learned just now we'd be waiting to come in a door right and they'd be okay here we go and then everybody else would start like poking at each other and like getting excited like we just came home from the movies or something yeah and I was like everyone's acting so weird all of a sudden why is everyone being mad fake right now cuz they're I remember getting there and I was like I don't know anybody and I am it was like going into a new high school with like a bunch of hot girls yeah I was like and I got to wear this wool skirt are you kidding me um well we clicked right away because we were the two local hires local hires which means like sound to me which means we had to like Pretend We're from there yeah we had to Pretend We're from Pittsburgh and just like live there on our own accord yeah and just figure it out so I famously um got hooked up my cousin's friend's friend owned a pizza shop oh yeah the toilet so I famously um lived there in the pizza shop above the pizza shop for four months and then when Molly was like I'm also a local hire I was like come stay with me bro I got there I remember I sent you a video of the place I'm like look it's I was like perfect you're like perfect there's no furn dude I lived in a hallway One Summer like I was like I'll live anywhere and then the toilet broke and I go dude I'm so sorry like cancel on you like this but there's also no toilet here and I'm like oh okay her toilet's broken like I'll and I think I remember I was like I'll fix it yeah you did I'm like I will fix it meat brick needs to see the toilet I'm like send me a video of the toilet I'll fix it I actually think you said quote I know my way around a bowl no but I stayed at fancy hotels cuz I used all my mom's work points incredible and I now I'm able to pay her back yeah with interest or what have you bought your mom anything nice since you got on the shot um that's a good question I what did I get I got my dad a big big ass fancy TV this Christmas and I got my mom uh oh my God what did I get my mom it was something cool cuz I'm cool hell yeah cuz you're cool I don't remember what it was but when she comes to town we ball out okay dinners everything on you yeah did she ever go for the card and you have to be like Mom please yeah yeah but she also like my parents construction worker and SLC Cilan and my mom's a nurse wasn't just retired like they didn't have money but they a lot yeah yeah wait your dad's construction worker mhm beautiful 310 Union Union man labor from Ohio when I think of Ohio I actually think of you really sorry about the Cavs while we're on the subject I mean sorry about the Nicks as well as and I am as for that yeah for our our shared misery and I sorry for that uh Nicks were my team number two cuz I do love going to Knicks games um do you get to go Courtside now yeah no they're like but they're like a couple rows close to Courtside um a lot of the cast goes to the Nets games court side what yeah I know it's like it's like we could go to the Nets games court side anybody could go to the Nets games Court oh I didn't know that yeah Jason kid played on the Nets right um and now he coaches uh he coaches the Mavs Mavs um I want to ask a few questions about SNL but we don't have to dwell ask way okay the things I want to know what was the call like saying oh I'm happy to tell you that that you got like what was the process like cuz did they come to you first of all or did you send a random tape cuz people just send these loose tapes and I don't actually think that's how people get on the show everyone's like no they asked me to come audition I'm not certain so in 2019 I got this Comedy Central up next it was a cluster Fest thing that was my big like finally I got something cuz it was right before I turned 30 and I was like I'm not I can't go on much longer like if I don't get something by 30 I'm gonna figure out like you never had anything that felt like success to you before them no and I was in Chicago and then I got agents through that and I thought my agents were just fans at this festival and we were talking about for Loco it was like two Bros and I was like we were laughing and laughing now they've been my agents for 5 years and they're the best amazing they really tricked me but it was a beautiful like very yeah but they got you flowy conversation and I trust him with my life beautiful and your question was oh who even cares at this point so then so then they were like do you have any character tape for SNL this is Summer of 2019 I was like no I'm not ready for that I'm like so standup haven't thought about that so I was like maybe I'll give it a couple Summers and then I went on tour I'm really good friends with Sarah Sherman we came up in Chicago comedy scene together so squirmy right squirmy yeah I went on tour with her shout out I went I went on tour with Sarah Sherman a couple shows in the Midwest and then um she's like dude you should you should send in a video to SNL yeah and I did and I sent in a five minute standup clip and then I was like I have these random character videos that I took where I used to live on in Lake G like on an island yes and I did one like usually you do a character reel and you do it in front of like a green screen I did mine like in a cave I did mine at a restaurant I did mine on a golf cart in a kitchen at a restaurant like what were the characters do you remember one was Captain Clan when we were on a sailboat and I had my two friends in mermaid uh Tails sitting there and I was like this Captain of the Sea Captain clam and then I did one where I was like a cave tour guide which I was one I put a pin in that coming back to the cave tour guide era but gone and then I did one where I was like a angry Chef yelling at my like hostesses for being in the kitchen when they should be in the front of the restaurant yeah correct and then I did one where there's a on the island there's a towing it's like a junkyard his name's Duff and he has a towing company called Camel Towing yeah and he's got eyelashes on the front of the top truck and it's hilarious so I act like he was my dad and I was this girl like from the south like who was working for her daddy and you know we got Bo buggies and yeah go ahead so then I got a call that they wanted to see me do standup live uh they had about I think there's like 15 of us in La we did five minute sets Warren was there wow with some producers and Michael longell was in that audition with me okay he had to go first and I think I had to go dead last and then they flew us out to LA or they flew us from LA to New York we did the audition on the floor right which was terrifying an outer body experience did you have to take any like pills or something to get up there no I was like I know my comedy and I'm here and if I just go out there and literally I got off the stage and I was like I did my very best there is no going back like I can't go back and like get a second try I just this is this is my ability yes that's the best feeling in the world when you go I truly have no regrets cuz that was truly my best it was my best and I was like you know what whatever happens happens it is what it is and I was coming off a high with like I got League of Their Own and I did like a small role in this like Mighty Ducks show on Disney so I was like I'll be okay I'll be okay I'll be okay and then I had to go back back to they flew us back and forth A lot of times and then I got the call I was at my cousin Colette's apartment in New York shout out to Coco Shadow Coco and I said uh I got a call and one of my agents were like or no I don't know I think it was one of my agents called me which usually Lauren calls but really imagine I mean I guess not imagine I guess it happens I was like and I wasn't expecting the call for another day or something and uh they're like you're going to be uh the newest cast SP around Saturday 11 I was like and my cousin has a video of me and it I just yell I was like thank you and I was like oh my God I finally have health insurance that's all I yell in the video which is so so sad actually very sad and I called my mom and that's be and then I saw you that night at K's birthday party and I couldn't tell anyone well you looked weird like you had this weird look in your I could not tell anyone I was like [ __ ] blood pardon pardon me that's disgusting but I was like we couldn't talk about it and I was living in a hotel and I was like my mom I always call my mom for health problems I'm like Mom I'm pooping blood mom I swear there's blood in my stool she's like you're going to get an ulcer you need to you need a CH chill out and I go I don't think I'm going to get one I think I got one damn yeah you were uh I was like why are you here you started blinking weird I was like I was like all right well I'm here to what was it for nice to see you um it was her it was Kate's opening night yes of her play and that's why everybody from the cast was there from yeah something like that yep well you made it so I have a few sorry I just no we needed that we needed that Journey now I have a few logistical questions so do they pick you up and drive you to work or you have to go there yourself um we go there for Co they everybody had a personal driver Co yeah I and I wasn't there there for Co okay I was going to say you weren't there yeah but I came in the year that they find they like canceled all that stuff but for Co they had everybody had their own driver because truly because they had that's how the show kept going without people getting Co um we do not have drivers I go I take the I take the F train straight into the building it's awesome it's my special time to play my games beautiful now what's now what's like the works like what's the work week like we do get cars after 9:00 p.m. yeah that's like a safety issue yeah I think that's a lot of jobs yeah now what's the work week like you start on Monday but I still take the train cuz I get a car sick really yeah you'll throw up or you just won't feel good no I like I'm I am on the I get on the verge of puking wow okay it's I think it might be an Irish start counting the buildings outside it's bad I'm like okay okay okay I get home and my girlfriend's like uhoh and I'm like I know I just need to sit by the air conditioning for a minute yeah you got that Irish stomach God it's terrible I have that I used to have that as a kid too you used to have it now you grew out of it I don't even maybe I do and I don't notice it because I'm always so uncomfortable how would I even notice if I was nauseous too yeah like as you get older you're just you're always you never feel good no how would I know if I was car sick sometimes I didn't feel good when I got in the car yeah what is that so why would I be why would this be car sick I always worry about my intestines yeah well we're all you know on Tik Tok they say we're we're doomed because the wheat because the way they're manufacturing the wheat yeah of course so and and and the manufacturing of the of the wheat you know what they said that's an Ohio problem not Cleveland not the city we we're not doing that in the city all right well I was out there and I was at w wapa Cana what I was in the town called WAP Cana Ohio okay I don't know where that is there was a lot of corn there yeah yeah yeah like that that's that's where I went to watch the eclipse good for you that's cool my family watched it over the lake they could have made a million dollars putting their house do you know that my we have a shared home yeah it's right on the water and we share with my aunts and uncles and my mom's like trying to get her SI her sisters and her in-law be like let's go let's put this so we can get 20 30k and everyone's like not a chance like why would we give where would they go then yeah I mean you could stand in like the parking lot of a Wawa and watch it we don't have wahwah and it's still breathtaking wah wah wah we don't got W wahah wahah change my life is there a guest what's your dream guest and musical oh I love this question post like where to the point where like you would be like this is my episode I'm nervous to talk for music I would do Justin fever okay that's doable that's probably or shovels and R which is two absolutely different what shovels and r yeah what's that it's a band it's like a what kind of band it's like a like mford and Sons no it's like more rough like yeah like they're great I don't know all right I'll check it out okay so shovels and rope imagine Jake Gyllenhaal going ladies and gentlemen shovels and rope I be like ladies and gentlemen it's like country like bluesy I don't know I'm probably butchering it but but yeah Justin B brw good Lord You're a believer I'm a Believer my mom and I really love what do you think is going on with him oh my God is he okay I think he's doing way better I think he's off all the pills at least you hope so do you think he was abused by Diddy yeah yeah seems like it I hope not but it's it's definitely um it's giving it's giving abuse abuse it's giving trauma and that's around the time where he kind of went a like he went crazy he had to turn to the what's the name of the church they go to Hill storm I don't know but I don't think anyone should be against Justin Bieber for his behavior like the poor kid went through I'm not against him at all I'm like say one word say one word [ __ ] how about that say one bad word you guys you're done say one [ __ ] word done you won't see your mother again Ronnie say one say one good word that he hasn't been the same since purpose and you'll get knifed by Meat brick okay meat brick will be on your ass no I love Bieber but for for uh host yeah um um I would love Melissa McCarthy I know she's hosted a bunch of times she be good I hope she does in my time there I love Julia Louise dfus I'm a huge fan of her um I'm really coming to to a to a halt what about you I would like and this I don't think this would happen but I would like Action Bronson why you why you who that again he's like he's the person whose career I want he raps but he doesn't really rap anymore he makes olive oil he makes sweatshirts he does like a cooking show called [ __ ] that's delicious he R I don't know he just has a life that I think is nice yeah you know what speaking of olive oil why is a cop be so expensive you know my girlfriend came home with a thing of olive oil $34.99 I know well they do say glass bottle is a must yes really yeah anything like West oh and Matt matd ma math ma Matty Mattis would be fun I I like him maybe Action Bronson and mat mat math is in on the same episode yeah what about like Fran lioet oh come on as AAL guest imagine of course Devon Walker would die for her is he a Liu head absolutely we got to get Devon on the Pod come on come on the Pod bro come on Brother come on my guy I love that sweetie pie he's the best I love Dev um has there this is the last SNL question has there been anyone that you were like too nervous to interact with or do you just I kind of just go up and go what's going on how are you what's up I went up to Jerry Steinfeld and I was like Jerry no I was like hi Jerry my name is Molly he probably thought I was like a boom mic holder or something like you know who's why is the grip talking to me yeah and then uh I don't think I I mean you'd think like these huge Superstars like dualipa Megan stallion like they're just so fun and they're so down to earth I'm like oh my God I'm sitting wearing slippers sitting next to me Megan the stallion and she's wearing slippers and we're just sitting here wearing slippers wow did you ever think that this is where you'd be it's pretty cool when you were wasn't your side hustle painting houses and I don't mean like physically painting the houses I mean like drawing pictures of houses I draw houses for realtors and if people were selling their childhood home and do like a little picture for their for a gift um yeah that was I haven't picked up I haven't drawn anything since I got hired so what I know well used to be it used to be my like love and now it's more like oh that's what I that's my old job yeah you'll go through a crisis at some point absolutely and you'll pick that pencil right back up absolutely you'll go stand outside the met and you'll start drawing the met the freaking number two pencil honey I use 05 mechanical okay just tears rolling down your face don't worry you'll go through something okay you'll be at the M oh how'd you get into that like how did you convince people to let draw their houses my aunt Tesa my godmother was like I'll give you a hundred bucks this is when I was in high school like a sophomore she's like I'll give you a hundred bucks if you'll draw an Sam's house because they're selling it I was like 100 bucks I'm like easy done I'll have it you in an hour I was like I can put all that in my minivan for gas yeah um and then my aunt and uncle John like my Aunt name and Uncle John put it in in their house and then they'd always have parties and people like oh my God who drew that and then they would connect me to them and then I would be like 100 bucks 100 bucks and I like going through got to college and I was like okay I can really make some serious Beer Money mhm mhm and then it's truly free advertisement cuz it's like you give it to your mom your mom puts it on her wall your mom has ladies Club does your mom have a ladies Club of course what is that mean explain walk her and her besti is from like couple from high school mostly college old roommates and they all live in Cleveland area and they used to meet like every Monday or every once one Monday which is sickening that was Monday one Monday a month and they would rotate houses and then they all had kids around the same time so I'm like friends with a lot of their kids and we would be like oh ladies Club is at our house tonight so we have to be staying in the basement and maybe they'll throw some scraps down the stairs and God forbid we go up there to use the bathroom so we'd have these have these jokes it would be what were you like in high school theater kid [ __ ] no dude no that was were you the one who's like I'll get the beard I was in the theater I was in the place I didn't drink beer I got suspended I didn't have any alcohol till College really I you have a alcoholic family member no truma or something I didn't drink because I was afraid I was going to tell everyone I was gay interesting so I lied and said that I was allergic to alcohol how would you even get that in your head that like that's something that would happen though because I've seen drunk people all over my life up and I'm like these people are idiots got it um and I went to all girls catholic high school and I loved it yeah was awesome cleaned up yeah it was great so you didn't drink till college and then it was and then it was on and then I came out junior year of college but I started drinking I think I must have went through something I was like whatever drinking you go I'm G I'm drinking beer G bring me the funnel now stat I remember I had a Natty light I'll never forget it I was like I had a Natty light and I was like finish [ __ ] and I was like I feel amazing yeah it'll do well Natty light too I mean that's a that'll hydrate and I went to a Catholic College which was an accident I just transferred there because my first college was a mess you're not the first person that's told me a tail like this so what's a Catholic College well I guess like there's a lot of Catholic like forom is a Catholic college right and those kids still rip it for yeah your mic's not on anyway whatever we have a lot of cathic colleges here I mean I think it's truly because it's more expensive it's closed school it's uh they're usually smaller they tend to be smaller schools but our it was like a huge party school I went to UNH it was like the number 7 party school and then what's un University of New Hampshire oh New Hampshire but I went for 2 years and then I was like this is not sustainable I know that feeling yeah um it is beautiful like in hindsight if I was more mature adult I could have appreciated I like New Hampshire is gorgeous oh I should have went to college when I was 25 100% I should have G and made like I should have worked in like hospitality industry lived in my parents house yeah saved $200,000 working at Ruby Tuesday living in your parents house and then went to college when I would respect and appreciate it more yeah we didn't need to go to college at all dude I mean the best thing about college for me was when I transferred back to the city and then I ended up being able I started paing instead of going to class so that ended up being the real valuable part right was that I started working that I started stand up in college too so that was like What if I didn't go to college I don't know if I would have started yes I probably would have figured it out but you would have figured it out I would have figured it out were you the class clown or no I was okay I was but there was many there was a really funny really a funny school there was a very there was a many fny funny friends fny funny friends at my high school are you still in touch with them yeah there's a little Squad of us they came to SNL um and that was pretty cool has anyone tried to like com for you now that you're on SNL not a chance no not a chance not a [ __ ] chance bro come for me I'm just kidding I don't think anybody wants to come for me or get me or anything if you do I'm a nice I'm a nice I'm nice don't don't come for me wait so we didn't um firmly establish though now that you have a few dollars in your pocket what's the summer looking like I'm going to last last summer I really traveled a lot and did a lot of standup this summer I'm just trying to be in the sun wear sunscreen and stuff but like relax okay I feel like I was really stressed out I've been really stressed out so I just want to see my family I got a lot of my cousins are my besties so want to spend some time in the lake yeah what's going on with this lake house float around this island thing well my family's house is on the mainland side but there's Islands there's seven or eight I might be wrong Islands in Lake yui one being put in Bay it's one mile Bay put Dash in dash Bay so put in Bay it's called that because they used to put during during the War of 1812 okay keep going during the War of 1812 they used to use this in like the in Elk of of the island and they used to put the boats in the bay to hide so it's called Put in Bay another name for it is South bass Island because there's a North bass and a Middle Bass Island and there's also peely Island where they do like a half marathon and it's actually it's technically Canada so you're doing Island Vibes this summer yeah I saw a great meme that was that said it's going to be a Tony Soprano summer having anxiety by the pool yeah and Ducks I like that ducks what are you doing the summer I don't know I don't really have any plans I just moved to Jersey oh my God I moved to New Jersey there was a uh I've already had to call the police there was a stabbing next door but then I was trying to tell my my friends were coming over as the stabbing occurred so there's like blood all over the street and there's um like the police are there and they tape it off and I'm trying to tell my friends are like one of them has the M like her mace out I'm like it's fine it's fine it's a familial issue it's not a randomed yeah yeah it already happened that's that's my second Cay SE something say something of the of the Year wow um I try not to do the see something say something but the lady was yelling call the police and call the police and you said something and then we were all looking we were all came out at the houses and we're looking at this stabbing and she goes don't just [ __ ] stand there call the police I was like all right I'll call the police I'll do it and guess what they didn't answer and they call me back they didn't answer yeah so what the heck it's ringing it's 911 911 good they didn't answer there was no answer like 30 minutes later I get a voicemail like hey if you just called this is um 911 if you have an emergency call us back if not disregard I'm like 30 minutes [ __ ] I'm dead anyway then I called again and I did get through but that I was trying to explain to my friends cuz they were all freaked out I was like don't worry it's just a familial issue it's two cousins having a disagreement I would never St it's not like random crime on the street bro I would never stab my cousin I'm trying to think I have a lot of cousins would I stab any of them let me go through the I got one cousin that snores but we kind of battle snore cuz we have a big bunk room in our Cottage so I'm I'm I'm in my 30s and I'm sleeping in a bunk bed with like eight nine of my other cousins M and we're getting old yeah and I'm just like you know it's pretty funny and then one my my youngest cousin who's like 16 he's like we got to keep you like we got to keep you uh you know don't get your l your head get too big what am I trying to say you got to keep you grounded humble grounded you got to knock you down a peg yeah like you think you're you think you're have value it was hilarious they're like you're on the bottom oh SNL nobody watches that [ __ ] shut up I know it was like fair fair and then I bought a shower curtain and put it around the bottom bunk so I have a little bottom bunk uh shower curtain action so I have my own little space okay that's good that's with a fan blowing in that's what I heard that's what I heard how proud of how proud is your mom for we're well my mom got to be on SNL for Mother's Day oh that's right they had all the moms and uh my mom's like all I want to do and this is before we knew the moms were going to be on the show cuz they did it a couple years ago but Co y y y yeah so my mom's like Oh can they put me in a bald cap I really want to be in a bald cap and I'm like sure I'll do my best cuz I'm always wearing them cuz I always have to play dudes I'm either playing D old dudes right bald dudes or nuns like that's really kind of my ammo which I appreciate I guess it's fun but I get there Colin Jose is wrri writing the cold open which is the mom thing and I'm like Colin my mom really wants to wear a bald cap that's all she asked for and he's like okay do you have a joke to go along with it and I go that's the joke that my mom wants to we bald cap yeah she's always asking me about it he's like okay and I'm thinking he's not going to do it and then the script came around and it's like Molly and their mom in a bul capap so it was awesome um and my mom's like this is the best day of my life oh my God and then she's like no Brian mly sha this is the fourth best day of my life I'm like good save lady it was awesome but she had to stay in the bald cap from 7 to 1 1 in the morning did she go to the after party of course my grandma my 88-year-old grandma really they have a couple drinks absolutely and my cousin Gil we had steaks at 4 in the morning wow yeah how drunk do people get at those After parties talk to me talk to me for real honestly it's it's no names no names no no I would never say names it's it's like the guests of guests of guests are kind of the ones that go the craziest um but it's pretty exhausting like you're you're we go to work at like I think we get there at 11:30 in the morning and then we get off work at 1 get to the party by like 2 right but and then you stay out till 6:00 a.m. oh yeah and then Sunday no work right Sunday no work it is the dead zone and then Monday we're back to work at like we do pitch with the hosts on Monday evenings okay so you don't have to be there till the night no you have to go in and write your stuff right that's Tuesday but we go and we do write some people write like Monday nights after pitch but I go to therapy at 3 and then I take the train straight to work shout out shout out so Sunday is just like bacon egg and cheese in bed Absol what time we get out B 600 p.m. maybe no I'll get out like I'll get out of bed at like 2: or 3 no matter how late I'm out and I'll kind of like move to the couch cuz I will get too depressed I need to like move my move myself yeah got to do a couple down dogs yeah if I'm not feeling terrible I go outside um sometimes I go to my cousin Colette's house and we play cards and stuff who is this cousin Colette second time she's come up now what's her deal I'm going here my cousin Colette and we got to get Coco on the pot we we lived together in Chicago and she had a N9 to5 like she was a normal job she went to Loyal of Chicago and I was I'm a couple years older than her and I would be going to open mics in Chicago like just I'm like oh I'm going to a bar this dead bar to go do jokes I'm like can you please come I have to bring five people or whatever right so kette would come to all these open mics for years and years and years and then eventually I started getting like pretty good at standup and on the seven years ago I wrote a note on the door and it was like Coco one day we're going to be rich I killed it tonight you're like on 17 Aderall and so so then she sent it to me like a couple months ago when I was at work and I was like oh my God it the note worked yeah which was pretty cool cuz now C comes that SNL a lot and she's like my um I hope this isn't disres like belittling who she is to me but she's like my blankie she's like my human that's not disrespectful at all she's one of myor can be as a PE as a person yeah she's the best is a comforting person you know you ever consider like if you hadn't moved from Chicago to New York well I moved from Chicago to La that's right what if you just stay in Chicago I thought I I was what if I stayed in Chicago did you ever think about like I don't want to do this I think if I stayed in Chicago for too long I would have never left and I felt a part of me was like hey you've done every club that you had a goal to do you aren't the best but you're not the worst in the city and I got agents and I was like they were trying to get me to move to LA so I was like I'll do I'll do it and I was like I am maybe G to get this big role on the show right I found out I found out I didn't get the RO the lead one of the leads in League of the league right that's right cuz you were auditioning for uh the Mel r yes the league heads the league heads love the show so they're going to they're going to be thrilled with this episode I love Melanie field I think she's so talented I didn't even know who was there was a couple people it was but I was like obviously hoping and praying I would like this is amazing you know but I was so green I was not prepared I wouldn't it wouldn't have worked out for me and I wouldn't have been able to do SNL yeah but I don't think I I was too green anyway but I you know you're young and you're hopeful and you're like oh my God and I'm sleeping on an air mattress and my like a very loose friends apartment because I we knew each other a little bit but she had she whatever my agent called me and there must have been glass in the room I was sleeping in so my air mattress is slowly deflating and my and my agent's like hey M I'm freezing I'm freezing in this apartment the the heat wasn't on because it's Del she's like I'm not turning the heat on I'm like I'm freezing freezing and I had this one little blanket I bought from Target and I was like what's up JB did I get it am I going to be a star he's like you know Unfortunately they did they did decide to go another way and I was like that is so that is ABS that is totally fine ah they deserve it it's okay okay well I'll talk to you tomorrow and then I'm my back is like hitting the the ground and I'm like oh my God I was in Glendale like just laying on the hardwood floor that is such a funny um just visual of a moment oh yeah those are moments where I'm like how did I get through that cuz I was so dark but looking back it's it's hilarious like just deflating on the air mattress so devastated trying to stay positive just like oh I totally get it I got one of those calls this week too I go I get it I love it I love it I'm sorry no you just got to go hey I love it let's keep going isn't that great good for them good for them I love it it hurts it hurts and then you hang up the phone you just got to take a little meat time oh yeah usually it hits me like a day later no no I'm certain that one H me and I was like all right well I live in LA now and what do I do right what were you doing for money then I don't know okay I I was drawing houses yeah um and I was looking for work wow and you didn't find it I was really flying by the seat of my pants I had no plan that's how it is though scary I just moved up to [ __ ] a a giant Hill that over hoken wait that's awesome and I'm just I have no idea we're just having fun having fun we're just saying it's fun and just we'll just keep pushing yeah exactly I do believe it all works out because if you had gotten that series regular role on League you would not have been able to take SNL correct so in those Mo so for our audience in those moments of deflating deflating of just sitting on a laying on an air mattress weeping as it deflates $100 air mattress because you didn't get what you would have thought you wanted that's really the lesson and when you look back if you would have got what you thought you wanted then yeah my goodness and I mean it did take two years but just keep TR just keep pushing I'm in notebooks I work at I worked at the covid vaccine site did you yeah did you did you jab people my mom's like they're letting anybody jab my mom's like they're letting you give vaccines to these people I'm like Jesus Christ I'm like no Mom I am the nurse's aid that is so funny I'm the one who signs all the cards I can't have you working in a cave painting houses I did all I could did all working at the vaccination site oh I was a petty cab driver I stop go back and tell me everything so I need I need a brief explanation of the cave tour guide and I need to know what you mean but when you say Petty cab driver on the island I wanted to make all the money I could I was a Pedic cap driver the mayor of or the the principal of the the school on the island own a petty cat business for a very short time and I was like oh extra cash perfect little did I know you know I was smoking cigarettes I was like 20 years old 21 smoking marble lights getting wasted every night like in Little idiot living above the restaurant that I worked at like I was like who who do who was I to think that I could ride a petty cab with midwesterners on the back of it hardy people hung over in 80° Heat just like spitting cigarettes from the night before out of my mouth like just try there's like one Hill on the island and I literally let a whole couple fall back once I had I I I had to get off the bike push them up the hill and I go this always happens I let go my hands slip out the petty cab goes spinning down the hill they keg of their I mean their cooler of beer goes flying everywhere and I was like I'm so sorry how much are you making for that type of ride oh dude it was only three bucks a person stop and they would tip me stop so you made $6 you're like extra cash brother it's not like we grew up in the the six bucks gave to the owner of the petty cab I kep the tips oh no then I kind of learn we then I did learn a little trick where I would go around the main Bart town and I'd be like it's too hot let me just take you down the road give me 10 bucks I'll take you down the road right right and then but I only I literally the job only lasted like maybe a week and I was like I can't do this that is so funny maybe a little longer but now what about cave tours I was doing murals at the hinman's winery okay while I was working at a restaurant at what Winery hinman's Winery on the island and they're great I love them they're my favorite people they're so nice and I was doing this mural and it was outside the entrance of the cave it's a winery and the whole Spiel is in 1892 they were digging I think it was 17 whatever doesn't matter it was a long time ago they're digging a well for more water from the lake and they struck a geode it's the world's largest geode celestite Crystal okay point3 on the most hardness scale okay don't touch the crystals okay don't touch the crystals because the crystals will turn black from the greasy fingers that we have as as humans okay so it's 52 ft into the ground and I was painting the mural outside of the entrance and my buddy Dustin who's one of the owners he's like Molly do you want to give a tour we're like down or down and out like we really need somebody to give it to her I'm like yeah I know there Spiel I've been painting outside every day like no one so and then I get roped into doing this [ __ ] and I'm giv tours sweating my ass off going down 52 feet into the Earth and it's like it's like feels like air conditioning down there but it's wet right so if it would rain I would have to take two Home Depot buckets and do this little hand pump to get the water out of the cave and I'm sitting there standing looking at my beautiful mural and I'm like now I'm a cave tour guide I did that for a whole summer right it was like the size of the cave was probably the size of this room and we I would that's small but it would maybe a little bigger no probably this big but uh I'd bring like you know 20 to 30 people down there at a time you'd give about 20 tours a day what you get 20 tours a day yeah on a little was the most I've had yeah damn okay it was damn I took a BL I took a blind guy down there once I'm like sir it is really it's 52 52 feet are you sure he's like yes I'm sure and I go okay it and sir it is very it's it is very quite it's it's very steep yeah and he's like take me down there when you were going down do you go this is the performance of a lifetime oh yeah I I really got to paint the picture for this guy I go what you're about to see no it it was and then then I would work at the restaurant mhm so you love to work the same day and then I would do a standup show at night okay so you love working I love to work yeah okay good um you're the second person we've had on that was a tour guide and uh do you feel like it helped you hone your comedy chops by being like how do I make this [ __ ] funny I do think it helped like you become numb to being in fear of an audience right or it's like because you're kind of just like this is what I do and yeah like it helps you not be codependent with them yeah and it and it does help with like the fearlessness of getting up and just doing what you're doing you don't have like the anxiety of like overthinking everything because you're doing it so much cuz like the more reps you do and anything in life the better you get of course or the more confident I guess right when they say live from New York it's Saturday night and it's about to like you're going to be on camera do do your hands get shaky or you're over that now you've done it enough times I think standup has really helped live performance is just what that room is and you just go you know what I do the I've done this over I've done this thousands of times right in front of whether three people at a dive bar in Chicago or like you know 6,000 people opening up for a bigger IC like it's and there there's like a three 250 people in the audience so it does feel like a just a show right and you can't get you can't think too hard or else you're like when when they get all the new people in like the new cast members is there any type of inspirational speech anyone gives you about uh what to do or how to overcome any fear I think every cast member that's that was been there before have been like nothing but the best like I think the squad we have right now is just everybody looks out for each other everybody's really just wants the best for each other and everybody's so talented and it's awesome to work with Keenan and Heidi and Bowen and ego and Mikey day they're just they're like so incredible and I look up to them you know so it's it's pretty crazy that you get to work with those people that's amazing it's cool any final thoughts for the audience I know the league headss are going to be very excited for this the league heads shout out yeah message to the league heads I can't believe my first acting job was that I would that I had to cry but I think I'm a good crier I remember didn't they have to like wasn't the scene if I remember correctly we were all at like the um what was that called the beauty school yeah etiquette school with Nancy yeah and then they had to like drag you off screen and you're just going no SC wen't you screaming I'm crying and like I don't know to I forget who was standing next to me and Jamie's like just keep just keep screaming and yelling and crying off camera and I'm like oh my God and uh that was pretty hard to do cuz I'm like kind of laughing yeah but you crushed it thanks buddy so did you shout out thanks that was such a great experience everyone I've said it a million times on the show but I absolutely just had the time of my life making that show I it was cool and I don't understand how you guys did it through that the summer I was just like I was just like this is my life now the heat was I live in the pizza shop I live in a pizza shop and I rip it and I rip it because the toilet is over open and then shortly there after the AC went out too so we were really on dire we were really in dire straights but um that was uh some of the most F the thing I was going to say is that group of people were so welcoming there's so much camaraderie that it made everything feel great I do feel after like a day I was like oh everybody everybody's awesome and since then I've seen so many of us in the wild of course yeah at random other projects and shows and supporting each other in weird ways like it's awesome very fortunate we're very fortunate people very fortunate all right all right catch Molly out on the island out on the boat this summer yeah it's a money summer baby let's go let's [ __ ] go and to all the herd I want to thank you for being here drop a comment drop a review you know I love your ass stop I'll see you next week [ __ ] thanks for having me f love you thanks for coming bye