Celebration of Life for Allen Aldridge, December 9, 2023

[Music] for [Music] e [Music] e [Music] [Music] for [Music] yeah e [Music] h [Music] e for please stand dying Christ destroyed our Death Rising Christ restored our life Christ will come again in glory as in baptism Allan put on Christ and so Christ he may be clothed with Glory here and now dear friends we are God's children what we shall be his has not yet been revealed but we know that when he appears we shall be like him but we shall see him as he is those who have this hope purify themselves as Christ is pure Jesus said I am the resurrection and the life those who believe in me even though they die yet shall they live and whoever lives and Believes In Me shall never die I am the Alpha and the Omega the beginning and the end in the first and the last I died and behold I am alive forever more and I hold the keys of hell and death because I live you shall live also friends we have gathered here to praise God and to witness to our faith as we celebrate the life of Allan dowy or Aldridge we come together in grief acknowledging our human loss and may God grant us Grace that in pain we may find comfort and sorrow hope and in death Resurrection I invite you to join me as we pray together the Lord be with you let us pray together oh God who gave us birth you are ever more ready to hear than we are to pray you know our needs before we ask and our ignorance in asking give us now your grace that as we shrink before the mystery of death we may see the light of Eternity speak to us once more your solemn message of life and death help us to live as those who are prepared to die and when our days here are accomplished enable us to die as those who go forth to live so that living or dying our life may be in you and that nothing Nothing in life or in death will be able to separate us from your great love in Jesus Christ Our Lord amen we invite you to take the himn noes that are in the back of your in the front of your seats and join us on page 159 for Lift High the [Music] Cross World his sa Triant [Music] to all the world the cruci [Music] the cross the chist till all the world the [Music] Glorious the world the all the [Music] his [Music] may be seated we invite you to join us on page 137 as we together read from the prayer pray book that Jesus would have read from we read together Psalm 23 The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want he maketh me lie down in Green Pastures he leadth me beside the Still Waters he restoreth my soul he leadth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake yay though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no no evil for thou art with me thy rod and thy staff they comfort me thou preparest a table before me in the presence of my enemies thou anointest my head with oil and my cup runneth over surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever amen our scripture lesson comes from Philippians 1: 21- 26 for to me to live is Christ and to die is gain but if I live on in the flesh this will mean fruit from my labor yet what I shall choose I cannot tell for I am hardpressed between the two having a desire to depart and be with Christ Which is far better nevertheless to remain in the flesh is more needful for you and being confident of this I know that I shall remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy of faith that your rejoicing for me may be more abundant in Jesus Christ by my coming to you again this is the word of God for us the people of God this day thanks be to God Amen dear family and friends we come together to worship and in doing so to acknowledge the Christian faith that has been the foundation upon which our forebears have lived for Untold generations of faith in the power and the promise of almighty God but for beyond that we come to celebrate the outstanding life of Alan dowy Aldridge beloved husband father father-in-law brother brother-in-law Uncle cousin friend I hope I haven't left any one of you out there first as we celebrate Ellen's life we know in our faith that we must acknowledge our grief a grief that we all recognize in the loss of alen's presence Among Us it is a dark knowing heavy feeling and the recognition of change that is forced upon us and over which we have no control it is a reality of life and of death a reality with which Allan was so aware and yet having said this Alan would be quick to remind us that our grief our despair these are not the last words for we move from Christians from despair to Hope and from Death to Resurrection we live not in what was and what might have been but what is yet to be with a look forward and not a forward back backwards and as we do that we do it with one of God's greatest gifts the gift of memory well there's not a one of us that will forget the times that we've had with alen Aldridge in one way or another and equally important the things that Alan Aldridge taught us Ellen's Faith was revealed in so many ways but one that we all would recognize quickly is his faithfulness we could trust him he was trustworthy he expressed this in so many ways but we all would know that first and foremost his undying love for Gretchen M and their family those wonderful children and grandchildren and then those who were part of the wider and broader family equally important and to anyone to whom Allan Aldridge made a promise you couldn't be around him too long without recognizing that Allan seasoned life with a sense of wonder he would say of life it's it's wonderful and he loved it Beyond people as individuals he loved animals now his children are quick to tell me he lik to keep them at a distance but he loved them nevertheless he loves the beauty of God's creation the beach the sand the ocean the steadiness of the tide the mountains the hills and most especially his go Gardens alen really I think would tell you at heart he was born to be a farmer he was happiest when he put on his old Farmers outfit not the gentleman's attire he would have woron on the Durham city council maybe but dungar or whatever they called them and and a straw hat I never saw this particular Garden but what I'm told that in one of his residences he practically leveled the backyard and planted it entirely as a garden not just with tomatoes and beans but every vegetable that man could imagine and more recently right at the end of life the beauty of the garden he developed there at the residence in Waynesville he found beauty and wonder in the simple things too like ice cream and popcorn and chocolate pie when it comes to the Garden he would have understood the verse that Dorothy gurny composed that the sun is a kiss on Pardon The Birds thing from Earth one is nearer the heart of God in a garden and anywhere else on Earth some of you may not have known outright that Allan was an artist he had a a gift of artistic talent that really was seen in everything he did the things he developed he created he drew he imagined I love the story I heard about the day he was driving one of the granddaughters through Durham and they came up to an intersection where a landscaping Circle in the middle of the intersection had a very weird object in it and Allan made the statement to his granddaughter must have been when he was doing some of that Civic work I had a part to do in building that and she said well what in the world is that and he said it's art what what in the world is it supposed to mean and Allan said it's supposed to make you think to make you Wonder Isn't that [Music] marvelous you couldn't be around Allan long without realizing he had the gift of humor I think humorous people have a spiritual Dimension to life that those that are dull just don't have my my dad always talked about spicy people and those that weren't spicy and it was the spicy ones that he felt really were closest to God because they sensed that life was more than meets the eye there's something there beyond what we see Allan loved to play jokes and to laugh he probably thinks we're playing a joke on you today to have this service of Celebration move in over the Duke basketball game I love the story when his humor came forth maybe a little wisdom when his granddaughter presented herself to him for the very first time and with great pride her new bikini bathing suit and Alan probably said what is that it's a bathing suit how much did you pay for that and she probably surprised him with an exorbitant Su and he said you mean to tell me you paid that much money for that little fabric alen Aldridge was industrious Beyond it all you've all seen where he started his last business venture at age 78 oh my goodness we needed to help him an oyster Farm my goodness there wasn't a lazy bone in his his body he was born in high geia and had exceptional energy he never gave up like all of us he had his challenges his losses his defeats but they never got the best of Allan because he never veered away from that movement from death to Resurrection from despair to Hope beyond that hope and that forward thinking there was an aspect of Alan Aldridge that was simply endearing and that is his passion for helping other people he was always looking for ways that he could be a help to someone and those of us who were around him learned very quickly that if we had a need and we didn't want him pouncing on it we better keep quiet because if we said anything before you knew knew it Allan was going to be right there doing his best to correct the issue I'll never forget the afternoon he called into our home my wife Becky has a hearing empowerment and he was so excited he had just seen on YouTube some contraction contraption that had been invented it looked looked horrible it was wires and everything you put it all over your head and you turned it on and you could hear my wife wasn't too excited but the point is he was because he wanted so much to help her here Alan and wring together decided early on that one of the most important things in life is the nurture of their children and their family they loved them as individuals and they trained them to be mindful of their love that was a part of Allen's Faith context for living and of gretan also nothing was more important than family but getting close to it were Duke Athletics he was quite an avid fan and we can imagine how he responded when he learned that his beloved granddaughter had set her wedding Daye on the Saturday of the Duke Carolina annual football game which she had not recognized ized I'm sure she might have considered otherwise but it couldn't happen when that Discovery was made and so you know where Allen was it's probably the only Duke Carolina football game for a long series of decades that Alan Aldridge missed because family came first but not just family Beyond family Gretchen and Allan taught their children to reach out to others and they very openly say to us they taught us when we go to a party or to a gathering of people to look around and find someone who looks lonely someone on the sideline go up to them give them a smile and make them feel welcome he was s sensitive to the well-being of others what a marvelous gift but there's one aspect of Allan's personality that isn't always on the up swing but those of us who know him well recognize it IM patience he didn't know what patience was he was so energetic so motivated that when he wanted to do something he wanted to do it not yesterday or tomorrow but right now and those who knew him well would say heaven forbid anybody on the golf course who was ahead of him at the tea next up and slow to act or who had lost the golf ball and was taking their time to find it not only on the farway but to D to go into the woods as as well Alan alridge was also a motivator and he was a teacher he has taught his children his grandchildren his friends so many things that we will carry with us forever but he loved to motivate people to their best I thought this was great he had an annual award ceremony for his three sons-in-law that he loved dearly and he would pick one of them to receive the top award the best son son-in-law and his three beautiful daughters will tell you that that little award ceremony every year motivated a lot of good behavior on the part of their husband I love the story of how he taught his one-year-old granddaughter to walk family members were getting concerned learned her parents that she wasn't walking we had one of those in our family my son's youngest daughter she just wouldn't walk she just folded her leg and scooted around the floor and we began to nickname her on the side Scooter she ended up captain of the soccer team at Durham Academy but back then there was concern she wasn't walking Allan had that for this granddaughter and he decided I'm going to teach you to walk look at me and he walked in front of her and then he picked her up and he sat her down put her hands on the chair and then he stood back a yard away got down on the floor at her eye level and he said walk and she did and the family were amazed he made a water skill out of his four-year-old daughter she was feeling left out but she didn't really want to water ski but Alan was convinced that she was going to enjoy it like the older children and he put her on the ski and started the motor they pulled off she fell off he got her out of the water she was crying he put her back on the ski she was still crying pulled again off again off again on again until finally she did it and she became as he taught her a water scale he loved and she loved for the rest of her life well I'm back to where I began and that is with alen Aldridge's faith it had so much to do with shaping his character and I want to end with reading these words that to me are sheer power that come out of a letter that he wrote to his oldest child when she was leaving or had gone off to college and this was the letter some of which he sent I'm quoting life is really learning through experience and that's what makes it so wonderful each of us is an individual and must make our own way and in our own way mom and I are always around to lean on on when you need us and we will always be willing to listen we both love you very much and that love is totally unqualified there's nothing you could ever do that would change that love prepare yourself to survive in the world outside and be beyond that to contribute to others don't forget you're an individual and there is no one else exactly like you [Music] you are special oh my do you see why I'm so moved as we celebrate because God's love and truth and wisdom God's Redeeming Grace that takes our sins and forgives and leads us forward to move on and try again and again and again with an unending love is what took hold of him and brings us this day in our celebration to lift up with the wonderful truth that each of us is called to move forward from despair to Hope from Death to Resurrection with the assurance and promise of a love that knows no end amen as Dr Aldridge has testified to Allan's life and his faithfulness and his love we invite those who will now as Witnesses testify and offer a word about his life and what they meant to each one of them so we invite uh Arnold's uh spell to come forward and after he finishes we'll invite the others to come forward as well to this pull pit to offer words of well I guess the ghost of uh Allan future has already hit me this morning I get out of the car here at the church and DED to have my suit cleaned and nice and get out good to put my coat on and it probably wouldn't fit my 11-year-old grandson so I'll have an Alan Aldridge moment at White Star Monday morning um and then the sense of whoever the granddaughter was I was born in durman I've lived here all my life and I never saw anybody didn't ask me but and I'll clean it up what is that Allan did at the corner of University Drive In in Old Chapa Hill Road in fact I'm pretty sure I ask him the same thing so and Cappy called said keep it to 5 minutes and capping there's nobody in this room that's ever had a story from Allan that didn't last more than five five minutes so I'm going to try to I'm going to try to hold it to what you said um I read a book a year or so ago um if you know I'm sure most of the people in the room know who Bob Iger was and he was his uh CEO retired now he's back there trying to straighten out the mess now with uh Disney and in the book he talks about his first job with uh with Disney was in the mail room um working when he was in high school so in thinking about what I would talk about since my career started in the mail room at Allington who he hired me in full-time 1973 though I met Allen for the first time in 1969 when he had just bought Allington we were doing some repair work my dad was the maintenance guy at Allington for years loved Allen Allan loved him and he always called Alan Wildman Allan called him Clarence which people would say what is Clarence anyway that's another story which I've got to keep under five minutes so anyway oh back to the mail room story so my job was to go the post office pick up the mail bring it back get it sorted by department and everybody would pick out to get their piece of the mail well Allan had told me a few weeks earlier he says you need to be on the lookout my ACC tournament tickets are coming and I want to make sure I get them so I'd watch the mail and sure enough they arrived but uh at the same time a friend of the family uh David Dixon who knew knew everybody and he was there picking up mail for his company at the same time big Carolina man as a witnessed to big big Duke men and I was the same way Tar Hill guy but um so when the tickets arrived I I was standing there at the post office had these little things across one another and dve was said I said oh man this is going to be a great day for Allen his ACC tournament tickets are here and David says let me see those so he Wheels them around here and he goes to the postmaster guy that the counter who knew us all by our first name and uh he said I need to borrow a red pin so the postmaster gave him red pin he came back over there and he put past and this could I could be off about the word if if David you're here you can fill in the blanks but he put pass du please contact iron Dukes well David didn't want David didn't deliver the mail to Allenton I did so I took it back Alan was late that morning by the time he got in everybody in the office knew about what had happened and so Allan comes in gets his meil goes back to his office and within a few minutes Lynette Deon who was Jim hawkins's secretary comes across to the rental department and she says uh Arnold Jim says you need to go tell Allan the story and I said is he mad she said well said uh whoever whoever he was going to talk to at the athletic department would not was out of town and and he couldn't get him on the phone so I'm thinking it's okay but about halfway we get across the back to Allen's office and and she says oh by the way said he's on the phone holding for Terry Sanford so so um when he didn't fire me he did say you know we'll talk later um I figured I was in good grace either that I was doing an okay job up or he just LED my dad too much whatever the reason it was um but to the family um good friend M Rick Souls his brother we were all went to thr high school together Mike died early this year and he was at our house redoing our floors number of years ago and he did he refinished and sanded floors well the machine he was using created a lot of dust and it had a rubber hose and it busted and there was stuff everywhere and we were kind of on let me take that back Diane was on a kind of timeline to to whatever was happening so my I looked to Mike and I said this is not good said I can I can handle this goes out to his truck comes back in and he's got this gigantic most most of your tape is like this duct tape he comes down he takes that rubber hose and he starts running that thing back and forth like this and I said Mike I said is that going to work he said Arnold he said duct tape will fix everything but a broken heart and he was very true about that thank you good afternoon everybody thank you all for being here to celebrate the one and only Granddad um before I get started I just need to know does anybody know how Tesla's stock is doing I got to make sure I check my numbers the greatest thing about Granddad is that he simply wanted to share he wanted to share what he was passionate about and he did not care if you were into it or not he just wanted to give it a shot whether it was surf fishing or gardening or or farming or anything Tesla whenever you saw him he wanted you involved whether you cared or not but you did because he was so passionate and you wanted to share in his passion and be in the moment with that incredible man uh like Dr Aldridge said he did have a great sense of humor uh and he loved poking fun at people me a lot of the time uh you see I'm a big Napper uh and that is not in Grandad's Forte but uh he always knew knew if my husband and I were running late to get to their house it was because I was sleeping uh so if I say I'm going to be at your house by 11:00 we Che up at like 11:15 and he'd go you're early and would be super thrilled I don't think there are many sets of grandparents and grandkids that poke fun at each other like that um but we were able to converse and have a relationship because that's just how Granddad was uh I was his granddaughter and I was also his friend um also known as his favorite grandchild don't let anybody tell you any different I'm going to miss his voice it was very loud and booming startling even just like his sneezes uh one day in Waynesville I was standing out on the deck and saw a black bear and everybody was still inside I was just out there by myself and so I didn't want to startle the Bears so I start turning to the house and I'm you know something Big's out there trying to get their attention and uh my husband and Granddad they're taking their time at the dining table they stand up and all the sudden and I'm going to try not to say you guys too much but it's all dead silent and then I just hear bear as loud as I could possibly hear him shout um he scared that bear off without even trying it was there was no shot for anybody to get a good look at it um you could hear how much he cared about you in his voice you could feel the excitement and passion for whatever he was talking about he left the best voicemails and I'm so glad I've kept a bunch of them uh one of my favorite is the day after election day in 2022 and just let's all get over our political opinions for a minute this is just funny uh my husband and I were lucky enough to attend Glenn yin's election night party in Virginia Glenn won the next day Granddad called and left a message saying that him and Nanny were so proud of Will and I for our success the night before it's like we didn't do anything bro we were just there hanging out getting you know free drinks and food it was great um but it was fun and it makes me smile to this day and I've still still got it on my phone um I don't have a lifechanging quote about him nothing that is publishable although I know he said things that are uh he cared deeply for those close to him and really at the end of the day that is lifechanging I know I loved Granddad I was so close I know I loved Granddad wholeheartedly and he loved me I also know that I hate Scotch so that's all yours up there Granddad enjoy the Golden City and I'll see you when I get there thank you hello everybody uh for those who don't know me or haven't seen me since I was really little I'm Sophie little Allen's fourth daughter and big Allen's 11th grandchild in birth order but number one in his heart I'm honestly happy to be here today uh we get to share memories and talk about the best guy ever my granddad lived life so well he was a lifelong learner and loved to share his knowledge and experiences um through teaching and storytelling long stories he was a catalyst for change during his life both big and small uh whenever something needed to be fixed around the house uh Granddad would do it himself before my parents even noticed it needed to be done uh this included but is not limited to getting on the roof to fix the Skylight like a year and a half ago uh building a fence and a gate for our dogs and adding a handrail so nanny could get to her garden safely when he wasn't learning about the latest technology or Tesla's newest product he was fixing or building or growing something fun fact Granddad programmed all the lights and in the house to function by voice command uh but you have to know the name of each room in order to tell the robot to turn the lights on right so to this day I don't even know the names to the rooms um and I wouldn't be surprised if he was like sitting in the hospital changing the names just to mess with us he was the ultimate doer uh the ultimate Problem Solver the ultimate Creator his never-ending curiosity kept him full of wonder like we've talked about and inspiration and fueled countless projects and Creations throughout the years uh from Real Estate software to multi-level golf driving ranges before those existed uh to oyster farms and Beyond he accomplished so much in his lifetime he showed me what hard work looks like in its purest form he also loved and cared for people so well something he passed down to Cappy Missy little Allan and Dudley he always made sure people felt welcome and were taken care of and he loved his beautiful wife Gretchen more than life itself I'm so lucky to know a love like theirs and it reached so many people it feels like his death is really just an interruption of granddad's life he was larger than life and always had work to do I can only imagine all the good work he's continuing to do from his new home I'm so proud of him and the man he was and I'm proud to be his granddaughter now I want to end this on a happy note so we're going to do something that's become pretty regular um around the house so my dad says I came up with a strategy uh but he's really turned into a movement here so shout out Alan Jr whenever we're feeling overwhelmed or stressed or just inundated with emotions we say wooo so and we throw our hands up it's part of it and I'm not a scientist but it is proved to make you live longer so let's all try it on my count woo one three one two 3 woo that was good I was going to make you redo it if it was sad but that was really good all right thank you guys as always you will never be the same from having known Alan Aldridge thanks be to God and as a fellow Alum Go do Let Us free stand for our hym of response on eagles wings [Music] sh [Music] sh you in the [Music] as we come to the time in our service where we pray we pray for each other we pray for the family and we pray for all those who G re this day let us pray together God of us all you love your love never ends and when all else fails you still are God we pray to you for one another in our need and for all anywhere who mourn with us this day to those who doubt give light to those who are weak strength and to all who have sinned mercy and to all who sorrow peace peace keep true in us the love with which you hold one another in all our ways we trust you and to you with your church on heaven and in on Earth we offer honor and Glory now and forever so we ask you Lord receive Allan into the arms of your mercy raise up Allan with all your people receive us also and raise us into New Life help us to love and serve you in this world into your hands oh Merciful Savior we commend your servant Allan acknowledging we humbly beseech you a sheep of your own fold a lamb of your own flock a sinner of your own redeeming receive Alan into the arms of your mercy into the Blessed rest of everlasting peace and to the Glorious company of the Saints of light god of love we thank you we thank you for all with which you have blessed us even to this day for the gift of joy and days of health and strength and for the gifts of your abiding presence and promise in days of pain and grief we praise you for home and friends for our own baptism and place in your church with all who have Faithfully lived and died above all else we thank you for Jesus who knew our griefs who died our death and Rose for our sake and who lives and prays for us as he taught us to pray we boldly say together Our Father who art in heaven Hallowed be thy name thy kingdom come thy will be done on Earth as it is in heaven give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who TR trp pass against us and lead us not into temptation but Deliver Us from Evil for thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever amen invite you to stand for our closing hymn Here I Am Lord on page 593 I the stars of I will the is here I am I you call in my I oh you me I will heart eternal I will BR heart my words shall I I [Music] am I am you call in my you me I will in my wind and I will the and I will my will I will I am to call in the [Music] some of you may not know is that Ellen Aldridge was um head of the building Committee of the fellowship hall here at Epworth United Methodist Church and as we leave here today we invite you to join us for popcorn and ice cream in that Fellowship Hall we will lead the family out first and we invite you to join join in behind us as we go down the hallway to the fellowship hall so now let us join in this blessing together May the road rise up to meet you May the wind be always at your back and may the sun shine warm upon your face the rain fall softly upon your fields and until we meet again may God hold you in the palm of his hand amen join I'm going to let you go on out and I'm I'm going out I'm going leave the [Laughter] [Music] family just no no go on out with this no no go ahead go ahead go ahead Don I sounded like an opera star till you moved away from me and then I started croaking you've got a fabulous voice thank you thank you all right okay amen and amen oh bab you going to we this way yeah daddy tissue for you [Music] in [Music] no I had yeah I worked for a chemical company for 16 years before i p uh before I all the ministry and then I to do my company had moved everything here to research the park that's how we got here I was living few I'll let you hook that and get your and I'm going to take that microphone we going to need that in the morning I got I won't take you there now well you this right here nuh you can leave it right here it won't go anywhere we can put it we can put it over the just leave that right here done [Music] h