Joel BROKE Sarah's Ankle?! Being Stricter Parents & Our WORST Restaurant Food?! FULL EP.30

hey guys welcome back to another episode of dad V girls after hours yay episode 30 love that it's round number it feels really high like let's quit while ahead no that's not no whoa all right mate so yeah Sarah's got on the iconic devu football shirt which we did and that literally sold out in minutes and we we get messages like daily about it yeah people saying when's it coming back it's like it's not really coming back oh it's not oh are we doing that are we giving a little up like a little sneak peek well yeah I guess we are but yeah it isn't coming back exactly but it is coming back in a different slightly different way yeah more appropriate for the winter but yeah so yeah keep your eyes peled literally and as well like so many influencers um were asking us for that was really funny cuz when I first got it I was like oh probably too old for it like not can't really wear it and then I wore it to film in and I got so many compliments and I was like oh okay fine like can actually wear it yeah what who complimented you the producer Steve oh it like I didn't know if you meant on comments when you were filming no so I was like oh cool okay um I wouldn't normally put with these trousers I had a pair of jeans but I couldn't bother to sit in jeans so Joel calls these my scrubs as if I'm a nurse um yeah cuz it's got a matching blue top and it does actually look like Scrubs I'm not I'm I'm okay with that it's comfy it looks cool though I like it I'm not taking the MC but it just does yeah anyway talking about comments um obviously we always read the comments so I it almost feels like I'm now just trying to prove we read the comments I'm like just to prove we read the comments here's a comment here no we do read the comments so guys comment below but um this is from area 2475 what do you think that sometimes I wonder what does that number stand for when people do a username and then they have like I thought more like what's her name it's can't even be a birth 2 six s five my boo baby maybe it's that yeah no it's not that their profile picture is literally the most don't show it picture of you I've ever seen in my life don't show it I don't need to we was probably going to put on screen or something no we're not going to put on screen why would you do me like that we're in like we're not even a minute in and you're doing me dirty like that are you all right anyway we're here now it's like one of those five pictures of me like she put two shot glasses up to her eyes and pulled the most ridiculous face and I think we took a picture of her on. five and that I've seen a few people with that as their profile picture why let why not that's the question oh it's ionic oh good one um oh gosh I need to move on so this is we were basically just we keep talking about having guests and don't have any guests on and and we were saying like who should we have on so this person was like here is guests that we need uh put Roland but sad doesn't want to come on uh Emon Ryan so we have said about Emon Ryan coming on at some point uh Casey and AA that would be a good Duo to get on yeah because obviously we had Casey on but I think getting Casey and a on would be quite funny uh Ros Sarah's mom yeah I your come I don't I'd like to think she would but she always says no she's a lot more shy on camera than say like your dad yeah so never know maybe one day we'll speak maybe like this she because she listens maybe she'll hear this someone said Chloe and Sophie I don't think Sophie would like to do it no um I think she would she Sophie would what Sophie would love to do is watch it she sometimes comes through the our studio not this one and watches us when we do filming but the last time she got banned because was so loud she honestly this kid was so disruptive right she was like chomping the whole time like crisp opening crisp open in we would be filming we were in our desk and then all of a sudden I'd F Sophie she would literally just come on to the be still next to Sarah hi like and then um she just kept then she would just like hecko us like just trying to film so I was like saying to Sophie like Sophie if you carry on you probably can't come back she does love it bless her but yeah she likes com to the office yeah so it says chlo and Sophie chlo I think would be brilliant on the podcast I think we should do an episode with her we can maybe come up with some she she doesn't have to be in like the whole thing for example we could do part of I think she could be in the whole thing I just think we probably need to come up with a bit of a format can't really interview her but I think like how do you feel about we could do some games and stuff I think it actually would be hilarious uh someone else they also said aa's parents to come on um which would be cute and then they said or maybe some influences to like Tennessee I don't know if people actually know that we actually have a really good relationship with um aa's parents like yeah firstly I want to played golf the other day with um aa's Dad yeah well they we're all really close but they're also really close to my mom and dad they live on the same road so they pop and have cups of teas with each other the six of us are like us to A's parents and my parents we always go for food together like it's it's really nice like it is really lovely parents and she's got really nice sisters that were also um so yeah it's really nice um I was just about it got me on to thinking oh they're going to come to my party so we can talk about my party cuz I don't mind oh yeah let's talk about Sarah's partyt why cuz I got extravagant is the way I'm describing it at this point I'm I'm going to be really chill I'm going to have a really chill party like just you know like oh no it's now like it's snowballing yeah I have got so I've got a cocktail maker making everyone cocktails the whole night which we had him a couple of times so and the cocktails are amazing they get everyone very drunk which is good fun I have got so the theme is um cowg girls and cowboys it's called Sarah's ho down and I have one of those mechanical bulls in the garden but I want to make sure everyone does shots before they go on there cuz I think that'd be even more funnier oh God who's who first to throw up that's the game we're going to play on that shot oh I can't get on that I'm like oh yes you are I'm getting you yes you are girl um I have got now these two singers that are country singers but their brothers they're called they're called um and they are they it's just they look really fun it's it's not serious and they take their character of like literally like Hillbillies like it's really fun and then um I have a really lovely lady that always does like my decorations and stuff if you follow me on my Instagram you'll always know I always share her party stuff they are the best but they've also just got this new pancake um literally a huge car so I've got pancakes for everyone and yeah it's going to be and and and it's I feel like by the next week there'll be more things that have been added to it I'd actually be really scared about if you plan a party a year out because you the more time you have the more things you add to it I know uh sadly no sh Twain still just to give you an update there no she doesn't agreed to our two grand budget but um no he going to be a good p and I I had two grand budget for cuz I could you've definitely gone over two grand well for just for singer no I haven't one over I actually haven't well you've not spent more than two grand on it you're getting everything for free basically they're my friends uh yeah so yeah and I'm I don't actually I'm at an event I actually land at 5:00 p.m. you're in yeah it yeah I was going to say like you're in another country not just that event elsewhere like you're fully I'm in Spain at an event and the dates kind of clashed but I'd already agreed to this and then you had this is the only day you could have the party I couldn't pull out of that so I've having to leave he's not there to help set upen well the thing is that I'm a little bit worried about is like who's going to Vlog it because I'm the person that would like Vlog it and actually make like a good Vlog out of it yeah and obviously you're going to be like preoccupied with that Casey sometimes if you give her the camera and like Vlog this she kind of half asses it sometimes sometimes she'll be like like brilliant right if you got especially if like say we're all filming different things for a video and then I'll go to her like cool you got yours oh no she forgot didn't actually Vlog anything what was going on so I'm like how are we going to make cuz I feel like make an epic Vlog but like how are we going to make sure I don't know can you ask Roland to come and just film it or something for me like follow me around with a camera I don't think you be down come with me while we set up the pancakes might have to get might have to get a cameraman in to come and film it but yeah I don't know we need to make sure we Vlog it because it's going to be epic is going to be a good party um so yeah it was going to be super super fun and I cannot wait but you had you have one job because I've been given one Joel yeah like this is we always joke about Joel not being thoughtful but I don't think you've ever really like thought ahead of getting me things so as in like I've had to message I messaged you here's the cake lady's number here's her name can you order at least do the cake you're like have you ordered the cake uh oh you being serious about that yeah let's just say does it go with my theme spark I said sparkly pink basically right what's going on here because really what you want is you want to control what the cake looks like you're like basically you're like does it go you why don't you just do us all a favor and just order your own cake because you know how you want it that's not nice no I'm joking I have sorted the cake sorted of course it's going to go with the theme what you think I didn't say like oh what the theme of the party was did did you get a little Pinterest going on to give it iide did a't that her job no she's the she's the cake designer she's not a designer like I always send her pict pictures of inspiration that I'd like she knows how to use Pinterest what I serious are you serious you didn't you didn't even think of an idea what what is it going to come like a big old cowboy Boo or something like what yeah why not wait what you've not actually done nothing you've just asked her I'll make a cowboy themed cake there's no thought of like how you would like it to look you know when I have kids their cakes I've designed it of how I would like Oh I thought she designed you just gave her a theme no you're joking no you're joking me I don't know anyone that like orders a cake what I might as well make it myself then oh you're right I'm going to come up with the whole idea so I basically have to design it yeah I'm really confused I thought I thought that's what I thought that's what she did so you're just as surprised as I am when this cake comes I I couldn't wait I can't wait to see what she comes up with could be a giant Wagon Wheel you have to CH all like the the flavorings and like that you don't just she's not ask me any questions what she just said yeah brilliant it's in the diary I thought that was easy she's my C lady she'll ask you no it's fine near the time well no you have to let her know the design sooner but what no you don't have to do the exact it's Cowboy I was like cowboy boot cowboy hat lasso like a little horse I think I could actually do one with Playmobile you I'm canceling your cake I'm going to make you ain't around anyway to do it you miss your flight or you're canceled you ain't coming anyway and you're going to miss the most epic party there there ever was yeah and that would be really sad but why are you saying it in a way that's so like aggressive like that would be really sad if that happened to me you're the one going away you're the one who booked it on the same day I had the event it wasn't in the diary anyway so I'm going to cancel your cake and I'm going to make it myself how thoughtful is that no now how excited are you never don't you wouldn't do that why it would be good no it won't be thoughtful when the kids come home and they made you a Mother's Day card versus you bought one from do you remember it's actually really funny sorry to my sister in in advance but do you remember I think it was like Holly or someone's first birthday and she wanted to make she made that cake oh my Lord the worst cake ever tasted she left the room and we were like what is this cake I don't know what she put in it was studge right as one slice of this cake was so heavy I was like why is it so heavy it should be light and fluffy right knock someone out you throw it you took a bite of it and it was just like studge it was like it was bad she knew it was bad though I think after she tried it and then she told her she said how is it like and we were like gross that also reminds me of a once when we went to a restaurant and the food was so bad but we were the only customers it was in Spain and we were we just walk past oh let's just eat and it was and the the guy that run it was so sweet it was so lovely and we ate but the food food was so bad we felt so bad we were right trying to hide bits in our napkins and stuffing in our bags and in our pockets not to offend them that the food was unedible I'm like no wonder why you're empty but you're so sweet and we're like wrapping it we paid we we tipped them we were like oh yeah so lovely we just did not have the heart to tell them but yeah all that food went do you know what weirdly right you'd think that is such a oneoff thing that's we've done that twice how many other people in their lifetime have done this like where we wrapped up food and it one I can't remember the other went to the Smith and Weston and we were doing a video and it was like the waitress orders our food for us she was so excited to be doing it to to be part of this video bless her and she ordered like I think the start was like this massive nachos and we filled oursel up on the nachos so all the other feel but she was really she was a bit nervous about getting it wrong about getting our orders wrong and not getting the stuff we like we were like no it's absolutely fine like just go for it so she got us all this other food and we were like we were just so full but we thought if we don't eat it she's going to feel really bad about herself that she thinks that she ordered the wrong stuff so we we were like wrapping up burgers and hiding them in the in the bottom of the buggy and um oh Casey said about that recently she's like how's that happened to us twice yeah that that's yeah oh dear oh and just going back to talking about reading people's comments which we do we you keep saying we I mean Sarah never does I read them I do but I read them to Sarah like bedtime stories I'm like Susan said you Lov Susan you should read them they're all nice comments about you they're basically like they're just they're just nice things about you mostly Sarah's the best mom she's the best wife just a deal with Joel blah blah blah anyway a thanks guys that is why you should should subscribe and PR so one of the comments I don't know how they uh we must have mentioned somewhere before about me breaking your ankle but we've never maybe said the full story yeah I don't know if we've said on a YouTube channel or on a YouTube video or not but yeah it was literally like um the worst time of my life Jak Jak um so basically we were in Spain on a family holiday and we had a couple of friends with us as well and obviously I this just really pulls out my flaw on what I'm scared of obviously I'm scared of water and fish okay mostly fish and we were on the lake and it was one of those like obstacle courses now can I just say the obstacle course on this Lake was in the middle of nowhere our car was miles away so when you then know I've got broken angle just think about that it was Miles yeah literally in the middle of nowhere like you have to kind of walk up almost like a bit of a mountain to get back to the car it's a 2 and 1 half hour drive back to home but we we basically was on this obstacle course and we're doing it and I'm scared obviously because of the fish now on the part where it's like a slide so it's black bouncy castle material so you shouldn't break a bone I don't know how but basically I was looking down the slide and the end of the slide stopped and then there was a gap to the next bit so I'm thinking to myself right how do I go down this slide without going in that Gap like I want to go stop but then get myself on the next bit so while I'm thinking that so's got the vlogging camera we were vlogging it it was before we were actually on YouTube but I was just used to film like like home movies on holiday and stuff I'm I'm next to my friend and she's about to go Joel comes up behind and goes go on go boots me down I put my foot on her back and like sort of pushed her I didn't like you don't anyone that really knows us this is not no way intentional or you actually any form of like so I'm not to blame you are to blame okay yeah brilliant you are to blame but you didn't do it maliciously so I was just like joking I was thinking yeah cool like she just been a wuss so I kind of K you down the side go but what you actually said was I nearly pushed your friend down but I thought I can't really push her so I pushed you so it was more like a just go that could have been her ankle instead of mine damn it um but then I go down I'm so scared I've ridged my feet like this I've stuck them out and I've gone stiff so as I've gone to the bottom my ankle went and I just heard it I screamed so loud I'm cringing I'm lit I was screaming screaming screaming holding on to my ankle you're up there so you shoot down then land on top of me to try and there was no way to safely get down so I was like oh no I'm coming down then I start coming down literally land on top of her but I'm screaming to Then I then it goes dead silent in this Lake like I then the everyone stopped you know and now I'm I'm embarrassed because everyone is looking at me I can hear Casey and Grace over there getting really upset like my mom what's wrong with my mom like but we're basically in the middle of the lake right so then we have to ask um a dad and her daughter you said can I use your dingy boat so the dad comes over the dingy boat gets me into a dingy boat but now I'm embarrassed cuz I'm like what B there's nothing actually wrong and I haven't done anything so I'm really embarrassed by the attent the attention I'm getting so I get out into this dinghy go onto the shore which is all Stones there's no it was uncomfortable I'm trying to get down and the guy that was like the Lifeguard had got me like really a hard lump of ice I can remember it now because it really hurt and he basically really hardly like P it onto my ankle so I screamed you were like Sarah don't be rude I'm like that fing hurt like ow she starts shouting at him I like ow be like be gentle with me like ow so then if I've not got all the embarrassment of everyone looking at me anyway I then my ankle is swelling I'm trying to I'm trying to put my foot down to put weight on I can't Joel and between Joel and his brother had to take it in turns to piggyback me up to the car and I'm in a mountain yeah like Joel's brother it was so embarrassing it was I felt so bad I don't think I've ever felt so bad the car and I remember trying to put my foot down being like it's fine it's fine um and then when I got in the car it just got bigger and bigger um actually I say broken it actually was fractured I don't know if you call fractur but I then was actually in a cast and um for like whatever it is the six weeks but I was so scared because being in Spain and he was going operation Operation and I started shaking do you remember and he's going no no operation like how he would say like no like why are we talking about operation I'm like Oh I thought oh my gosh I got have operation but no it was um yeah you did feel really I felt so so so terrible and then you had to inject me because home with that whole they gave us like and that I hate that I hated that like I'm not very good at things at that you a bit of a wuss but anyway that is the story of how I broke that just for my 30th birthday so then I had to go to we went my friend had surpris us by booking um Amsterdam for my birthday and I was on crutches and um yeah sad times anyway moving on well I don't blame you it's okay it's a good story to tell to be fair that's the first time you've ever said you don't blame me for that so thank you can finally release that burden on my should you know me I've got like an obsession with sunglasses I like I like to buy sunglasses but at that start of that holiday I was like there's pair sunglasses I like I'm like and you're like no you don't need them when you broke my ankle you're like I'm taking you for dinner and buying you them sunglasses I was like a all is forgiv thanks that's really cute right we're going to play a quick game to liveing things up we're going to play a game that I've prepared earlier yeah lies it is called would you rather so we're going to have question ooh I love the producer will went ooh he's the one that made the game he's excited right would you rather tread so this is a parenting Edition would you rather tread on a piece of Lego Barefoot or watch Frozen on repeat for a whole day oh easy Frozen on repeat on a whole day love tread on a piece of Lego B for 100% what yes that hurt that's a oneoff hurt watching Frozen skin that be all right shut up watching Frozen on repeat all day is a that is a whole day of hurt I I would love Disney on the background anyway I don't mind good for you easy next would you rather hear every 3 seconds of a long car car Journey can I have a snack can I have a snack it's pretty much what I hear on the way here Maddy loves a snack why I did not you are we nearly there yet um if I've got the snacks to follow it up then I'd rather hear asack cuz then I can be snacking myself at the same time that sounds delicious I don't know would you rather your child Drew all over your walls with crayon or put your car keys down the low what if it means like can I get the car keys back I'd do that cuz I've done I've I've got to be fair I've done plenty of these things times the worst is when you've weed and then you didn't realize you in your back pocket and then it drops in so you have to collect it while you've weed that's happened before yeah I don't mind when it's we though cuz does it really matter I wouldn't want to where are we going with this where are we going with this yeah definitely the keys down would you rather your child had an epic tantrum in the supermarket queue or did a very loud fart while you're out for a family meal again we've had plenty of these honestly I remember Casey having a tantrum on the tube do you remember that when she was like she must have been like four or five and she had this major tantrum on the London Underground and it was it was so embarrassing everyone was watching and you know when you're like you kind of like you want to shout with them but you're like you can't you're like say shut up you know when you like shout through your teeth and you're like you're going to in so much trouble when you get home oh do you not remember I felt like it was such a a moment that just sticks in my head like she was so naughty and she thre this huge tantrum I was so embarrassed and then uh CH literally CH farts at she I feel like she saves it for the dinner table yeah yeah like she she's like she's so that kid has got so much gas yeah and she literally she'll she she would do whatever she can to make it the loudest fart and everyone yeah to be honest I I'd much rather Chloe just lets one rip at the table then the Tantrum I can't the Tantrums get me cuz for some reason farts they are a bit funny people do laugh yeah no one's laughing at child having tantum everyone's like it's more just annoying it's like how long's this going to last and also like you're in public so you can't really like tell them off properly yeah but yeah uh would you rather be chased by a pack of wild bears but survive or listen to your child learn to play the record at full volume oh for me wild bears me recorder i' be I would literally poop my pants like but you're guaranteed survival that sounds like absolute Adventure s hell but you're guaranteed to survive no still M I would just do that anyway if you said right now you could be chased by Casey with her violin like like we've done that I'm not for the life of me getting chased by bears like that would be sick want to be chihuaha people would pay to be chased by wild bears if they were guaranteed to survive that's an adventure I would do that people do that like Ball racing thing don't they don't you oh yeah where they let the balls loose that's not guaranteed survival when they're doing that yeah I've seen a few people get a where is the backside for that it's bad where is that Spain yeah uh would you rather watch your youngest Child's favorite cartoon every day for a month or never watch Netflix again oh we're going to have to watch Char every day oh every day just for one month I think we some we Pro we sort of do that if it's Bluey I'm telling you now Bluey is the ultimate child program I love Bluey did you know I did I only just found out um well actually not that long ago but you know the intro is like and they're dancing and it's like it's musical statues and and if you watch they all stop the mom continues it's like Mom you're out so she stands to the side then it's Dad what his musical statues I've never noticed that before picture it now like can we just talk can we just talk about the difference between Bluey and Peppa Pig right I can't stand Peppa Pig Peppa Peppa Pig Yeah in that univers she is a little brat yeah it's not fair she always calls her daddy fat and lazy oh no your kids do that to you yeah I was going to say joke am I daddy pig my kids no but like she's not very likable I don't know if it's just me I don't think Peppa Pig is a likable character and I also don't find the programs interesting in the slightest Bluey like funny it's got like the right amount of like wholesome comedy it feels relatable it actually feels like I can sit and watch that maybe it's just me but MD still ches Peppa Pig over Bluey Co COC melon shoot me in the face honestly I cannot and now they've got COC Melon Lane and they got be Bey fin fin be fin why is it Bey fin what does that mean baby the baby in Spain baby but it's in English yeah but I don't I don't know no I think some things are like honestly some of those kids programs are but yeah but we actually don't watch like normal TV anymore we only watch Netflix we don't Netflix Disney um like we watch all the streams yeah yeah so we couldn't be without Netflix no no way especially at the moment I'm really into it uh would you rather your younger children picked what they had for dinner every day or you had to eat everything on I'm a celebrity get me out of here eating trial uh definitely oh I don't know cuz that would be Maddie what would Maddie pick me to eat every day pasta oh i' be playing pasta she does she like she does like spag ball though she does i' I'd probably I'd rather risk it with with Maddie than some of the things I've seen on I'm a celebrity she definitely ain't going to pick me a kangaroos to eat is she so like it can't be worse no to be fair yeah I think I'd have to choose what Maddy CU I know I'd eat it I'd like it but celebrities hard would you rather your child was told off by their teacher or you were told off by their teacher oh definitely them them joke yeah what oh no us us no them why should I get told off by a teacher it's very normal for a kid I was told off by the teacher once why because um Chloe had been having nail varnish on and they told her to remove it and obviously she then didn't pass that message on to me so I was literally coming across the playground and she was like Mrs cond nails I was like yeah thanks I just got them done I was like I was like oh gosh I'm in trouble yeah what you put yeah I I don't think it would end well for the teacher if they tried to tell me off I would not be happy I don't I can't stand other adults telling other adults off like it really even if you're in the wrong like it proper Gres on me like massively anyway homeschool your child until they are 16 or never drink alcohol again never drink alcohol again easy never I used to really want to homeschool the kids didn't I I got obsessed about at one point I was like let's homeschool them I think it's just cuz I wanted to travel so I was like if we homeschool them we can we never we can just go away and travel and film travel Vlogs and d d and like I'm glad I didn't do it I feel like it looking back it would have been the wrong decision but I was really trying to force it it was a big debate in the house Grace was all for it cas was absolutely not um but looking back because I'm not really a big drinker I don't think I would miss alcohol anyway I was pregnant didn't bother me for giving up alcohol I feel like it's I actually feel like and that would imagine that that's another 13 years of having like them home every day the boredom that they would I think as well do you know what it was lockdown actually taught me I didn't want to homeschool to Kids that actually was the it was after lockdown that I didn't think I ever mentioned it ever again because lockdown I was like homeschooling Kids Ain't actually that good there's we've got friends that homeschool they've got six seven children and they homeschool oh the Grim weights yeah they homeschool their children and we are like wow like oh honestly um yeah so if you guys might have seen them they've got a YouTube channel they're called the Grim Wades Grim Wade family and they coolest kids you ever they are that family is just unreal like their kids are I don't know even how to explain it like say when you when you meet up with them first of all they all call you like oh they they they're all different ages and they all come and say hello to you ask you how you are call you Uncle Joel Auntie Sarah and they're so polite and they're so but they're also C do you know what I mean like they're not like oh like little nerdy kids they're super cool kids super polite super engaging like can have a full on conversation I'm real ATB they're amazing at football they do loads of um dancing Tik toks um now and they're they're just so cool they really are they really are and they're just they are such a lovely family if you said to me oh there's a family and like they got this many kids and they all homeschool I don't know my perception would be different to what when I meet them cuz some and they're really close which is what I really like as well they're they're such really look out for each other which is really all the siblings like they all I mean they seem to just all get on it's chaos I'm we've how manys have can't I just remember how many kids I've got sometimes but I'm like sometimes it's chaos in our house and and case and grace are not close in age M um with the other three but somehow they've got all those kids and it's not chaos yeah like they've absolutely smashed the parenting thing well uh so like where you're saying like Casey and Grace there's a gap we I think because we were young parents as well like well I know for me I felt like I had a lot to prove of being a parent so I know we were really strict on the girls and I've always been very like we're a team we're teammates we help each other out um and um just like being like family orientated and and having chores to do and stuff like that and then the next three I think because then obviously we had Sophie which kind of broke that gap of she's not able to if I asked her to do a chore she'd laugh at me like you know like um she's Sophie's not really a team player when when Maddie and kby are like helping tidy up which they do help now and they do enjoy it but Sophie's just like nah absolutely not good thanks there there's odd things she do or but it's all on her terms but anyway that I think that's why and then life is busy but we're not as strict with the younger free as we was and which is fine obviously we're but I have said the conversation is like I want us to go back to being a little bit more stricter not stricter in that that we need to be you know like can't do this can't do that but of like just drumming it in that we're a team and I said because when we look at Casey and Grace and how they've become adults now they are unreal like I'm not I'm not just being biased here they they are thoughtful they are kind they want to be with their family I'm like it's everything like I really want Ed and I think our parenting skills help that and I'm nervous that if we don't do that and we're just very laidback that the girls like the girls will get up from the table and just leave their plates or like make a mess and just expect me to do it I'm like no we're a team I'll help you I I didn't make the mess but I'll help you but let's do it together that kind of thing as well we have actually had the conversation quite a bit like especially with Casey because Casey were like I wouldn't get away with that when I was their age or like I she doesn't but sometimes I feel like she sometimes I feel like embar I feel judged by Casey but I don't feel like she is judging me it's in my mind I feel embarrassed when like say for example Chloe's um like winding me up she's being naughty she's being rude she's answering back and Casey's that I feel embarrassed cuz I'm like it's embarrassing because like I wouldn't have I wouldn't have let Casey and Grace get away with that but I think what it is is I think it's like I think in a way it's don't come across the wrong way I feel like it's kind of like we've slipped into sometimes a bit of like lazy parenting like anything for an easy life so like I'll give you an example um say Maddie chooses an nice Lolly right and then she's eating it and then she realizes that Chloe's got a different one and she's like no I want the same one right an easy life lazy parenting is yeah fine just like give me that one I'll eat that one you go and have that one or or that one's going in the bin and just going to get another one problem solved like go back to your day like no issues saying no to her cuz she's three or not three she's going to be three this year saying no to her and then her kicking off cuz you know she's going to kick off and this could probably this could probably upset your day for like a good 30 minutes right it's it's one's an easy life one is like actually being like proactive I feel like that's what happened like we've been parents now for 19 years and we've kind of kept we've five times we've reset it and we've gone back and I do think part of it is um that whole thing of like pick your battles I I probably told Casey and gra off for so many things that did it really matter that was my my mindset and just I don't find I found that parenting is now easier as in I know what I'm doing I'm I feel confident I'm not feeling judged by anyone whereas I did with Casey because we were young parents we kind of felt like there was a pressure for us to be like to actually be like really good parents and like I always had like this fear or this worry that they would grow up and be like like little tearaways because we were young parents so I'd always think no like and that would make me be stricted them as in like I'd be like a stricter parent because I'd be like I don't want them to turn I don't want them to be spoiled I don't want them to be like um disrespectful I don't want to be this right but then because they've turned out so well I'm kind of oh I don't know what I was worried about but that isn't necessarily going to work because if we don't bring them up the same way the little ones then it might it might turn out different but and when I say like obviously being stricter and making them do chores I'm not saying like I obviously we're going to make I'll give examples right so for example um where they sit in the car right if it's just an argument and then you just try all you try and do is appease appease like try and compromise cuz it's different they want to sit in different cuz we got seven seat of car so you got like three rows and then the other day like Chloe wanted to sit in the back and Sophie wanted to sit on her she doesn't actually she's tall enough she doesn't actually need a car seat but she does want to sit on like a booster so she wanted the booster but she wanted it in the middle row and she was going to be next to Grace Grace has got Maddie on the other side of her in a car seat so it would make Grace really squished in the middle just because Sophie is just saying that's where she wants to sit so I said to her no you can put the car seat in the very back if you want to sit on your car seat it's in the back with Chloe if you want to sit next to Grace it's no car seat because it's too squishy yeah so she's kicking off and normally in that situation I'd be like sorry Grace just got a lump it that's it we're just going to give into her but I didn't so that's the kind of strict parents talking about so I took her inside I'm saying right mom's going without us me and you are staying at home obviously it's all the tears it's kicking off and I'm saying if you just agree to go in the back with your car seat then you can go then she sees you pulling off the drive she realizes that we're actually being serious like she's not going to get to go and then obviously she just she was like okay I'll go in the back I was like okay perfect so that is the kind of thing we're talking about when we're saying about being strict and then there's been a few examples of this like the other day when I was at David Lloyd's with the little ones you Wen went there they all had the choice of what snack they wanted and I showed Maddie the cookie I was like do you want this cookie cuz it looked like really big and like cool and the others were getting the cookies like do you want the cookie no no she wanted this little pack of like little kind of like healthy sweets so like cool so she ate all them and obviously the girls are still eating her cookies because they're bigger right but Sophie's finished her cookie she's like she ate half of it she didn't want the other half so Maddie's like I want a cookie actually I'm like well you had the decision Sophie's like you can have the rest of mine so that there you go you just got like she's like no want my own one want my own one want my own one and you know what Maddy's like she's like Chloe she's very strong willed so she kicked off and old Joel like three days before would have been like he would have been like get in the cookie don't want to hear it you're having the cookie it's fine I don't I don't care nope I like I even cuz I was with um Ryan so I said to Ryan right you sit with the kids I took Maddie all the way to the car all the way to all the way like through the car park back to her car I like I'm taking you home cuz all the cousins were in there so I was like I'm taking you home if you're going to keep crying I'm taking you home so she she went okay so I went not having a cookie she went no so we took her back in that's it that is what we need to start doing stop being like lazy when it comes love it is and it's harder for us it makes our lives harder now but in the long run it's going to be it's better for them because yeah and I think that's the kind of thing that we just need to be like we need to stick to our guns and not give in for an easy life because that is what makes it harder but it is hard but at the same time so honey we need to talk I I feel like I'm doing more honey need to talk than you recently so honey need talk we both said and we both agreed like we need to be strict to parents right and twice when I have exercised this new strictness you you literally like come back come down on me and being like why are you doing that and I'm like we we agreed we agreed to be like Chloe was messing around at bedtime and I said to her right and I never have done this before I said right Chloe tomorrow you are going to bed 15 minutes before your sisters because you messing around I've told you four times now to go upstairs and get your pajamas on and she's doing handstand rolling polish she's jumping on the sofa she's literally ignoring me down then she is the right way around so I'm like that and you're like why are you being so tough with her like and I'm like this is what we've agreed like what's going on you don't understand me because you take it out of context all the time like I've heard you shouting at her for and saying she's going to go to bed early and she's really upset cuz I can see where how her brain's thinking CL Sophie and Maddie were also and like obviously you said well a couple of other nights but in that moment as a child her two sisters are also messing around and not going and you're being hard on her and send her to go to bed early before her sister tomorrow but her two sisters are also doing the exact same and that's I was like I don't think that's very fair in her mind like you should be like you're all in trouble all go to bed but it was like you pointed her out yeah because there was a backstory to it so the last three nights in a row she kept she was doing this so I've I've had words of her every single night saying like Chloe you just don't listen right so I hadn't even really asked the other two to go to bed yet I was focusing on Chloe and I actually explained to her before before I started getting annoyed I was explaining to her I was like right Chloe we can either have like a really nice bedtime or we can have a bedtime where Daddy's cross with you right it's your decision it depends whether you listen or you don't listen so I'd already said this to her hadn't even like spoke to the other two I was like right to go to bed like go upstairs D said it again said it again obviously then I was like punishment madd's like two so as soon as she sees like Chloe go upstairs she runs upstairs and goes to bed anyway Sophie has special needs yeah but that's what that's what I'm trying to say is like because Sophia speci and she's a baby you're you are then automatically homing in and being a bit more tougher on Chloe but I'm seeing them all as like yeah I understand the Mis I understand the confusion yes there's no how you need to talk like but there that there was another time as well which it happened and you said I was being too tough but I was just I think in your brain you're being stricter but what I get I do get it is very hard because Sophie has special needs and Maddie is little it means we're being more stricter on chlo but it's easing it in of like we can't just all of a sudden she doesn't understand why we've made this decision we haven't sat her down and said oh we all a sudden going to be stricter this poor girl like bam it's hit her so that's what I'm trying to say of like it's that easing it in be strict to where you need we've got to be bad cop bad cop just straight in there you're now realizing I'm making sense like I she makes sense just all of a sudden be like you've switched and she just has to understand that it's like I'm explaining to her like the whole thing of what I said of you've made a mess in the playroom could you please tide it up if she kicks off say Chloe who do you think should tied it up did Mommy play in there to should mommy TI it she's like no I'm like who do you think I should okay if you go start I'm just going to do this I'm then going to help you that doesn't sound super strict it's getting her to do what we want to do and I don't have to be strict and shouting at her okay cool but yes fine whatever we'll just but I don't know I'm going to say fine she's right I'm wrong anyway asides from that boring sorry anyway asides from that I took um Chloe to the theater just me and her we had a date it was really cute we went and watched Matilda like she loved it I I just wanted to put it in there that she just had the best day with me and it's really cute so that's being really strict brilliant I'm so glad you shared that it was really cute no that is another thing that you you find boring the theater the theater love theater but I F I struggle in the fear right I've got a dilemma yeah I bet you my wife always drags me to the theater night you don't drag me I don't go with you anymore because you don't dance why would I dance in the theater that's why I got banned from the concerts right okay so my dilemma so I've been talking to this guy for a year now we made plans to meet up however it was the same time I was away in Dubai I was gone for 2 weeks and hadn't heard from him when I came back I missed him so much I reached out and to my shock he messaged me saying to avoid contact as he's now engaged to someone else what what that is wild he obviously was seeing that other person as well yeah that doesn't he was must been cheating his exact message in quotes that this is copy and paste hi hope you're well I'll be married soon please no longer contact me wait hi hope you're well I will be married soon please no longer contact or try and contact out of respect thank you take care I thought he was having me on but he's genuinely engaged do you dodged a bullet girl yeah now you need to have someone else dodge a bullet I've been through a very rough time since hearing this and not sure what I should do please advise I've gone on a few dates and tried to focus on myself but I really felt like he was the one absolutely not he is not the one he is that is the biggest red flag ever that you've dodged a bullet gout and you need to count yourself lucky and move on from that you you're better off to have seen that now before you moved in fell in love and he was a cheat absolutely not like better to be you in this scenario than his fiance because his fiance is going to go through hell way more heartache and way more hell yeah and she's only going to find out a lot later down the line when she's already W as much as there's the parts of him that you enjoyed you said that you thought he was the one you'll find all that again but someone that's loyal and faithful and that's what you need so it's like take the elements that you did like but find someone that is loyal and faithful and I know it's hard cuz like when your heart wants someone like it's really hard cuz it's like the emotion and everything will completely outweigh what your logic and your head and your gut is telling you because the heart is like it's like the most powerful emotion but that will pass it's not going to be easy until it does but like it will start to pass and you will look back and be like yeah my Lord may just have time like for yourself like find like sounds really corny but just find yourself and find like the values and the things that you want from a person don't go looking for dates because you're looking for them to match that person like and you're not you haven't got that if your emotion is still with this guy get over that and then start dating when you're ready it sounds like you're not ready cuz you're comparing and that's also not fair on new the new person yeah cuz everything at the moment won't look good enough in comparison but yeah and also on the first night I don't always think the first dat well actually don't think I've ever dated but other than be you but like I don't know if you would get you I think you have to date someone more surely on the first night you don't know genuinely what that person's like because they could be nervous and it could be like I think our first interviews I'd be rubbish at an inter like if I went for a job interview but I'd probably smash the job whatever it is I'd hire you just based on your looks Jo she's not even that good-looking you can't really say that when we've only we've got like employeer full of women people would be like oh that's why he's hired her that's why he's got her all right don't worry guys I'm involved in all the hiring process and I only hire them for good looks J Jes yeah so that's because we hired Susan and she is buts who is this imagine if one day we do hire someone called Susan I'm only joking we don't have a Susan in our lives yet yeah if there's a Susan out there we're ready to meet you we need you in our lives right we've got one more dilemma okay so it says how to navigate a teenage Secondary School relationship me and my boyfriend have been together since we were 15 and now we're 17 we we did break up for 6 months due to exam stress putting a strain on a relationship how did you guys get through the early struggles bickering of the teenage relationship and maintain the healthy relationship when you both are growing up so quickly and constantly changing wow could do a whole episode on that we should actually because I was just like can I just be honest like when I'd say about that same sort of age about 17 I think our our relationship became a little bit toxic and it was wasn't what it is today like obviously we've been together now we started dating Sarah was 15 I was 16 the first year was amazing we literally spent every minute either if we weren't together we were messaging each other we were literally lived in each other's pockets and then after a year it was like I think when you got closer to 18 so you were then like you was able to go out with your friends and you you became like really social I I think trying to navigate what you're saying of like having your own friends but also be together but exploring life and doing life like it was really really tough and we argued so much we would break up we'd get back together it was toxic it was hell like the thing is we we broke up so many times but then we always just wanted to be together so we get back together it'd be good for like a few months and then it would be like bad again I do think we're kind of probably like the exception to the role cuz everyone else we know who was like dating back then like no one else is like I actually don't even know if like when we fell pregnant with Casey like we were fully at time together we weren't we weren't even together yeah like even after we had uh Casey we still break up and stuff so yeah like we were so young our relationship I think became really solid when we had Grace and we then were like like enough's enough now like I think it became a point of we even need to make this work we've got two kids and like I think might have even broken up after we had Grace as well but there was there was a point that came where it like that breakup that breakup around Grace yeah it that was the one that was like we either make a go is either is this or nothing but yeah yeah you are right after we had Grace we had a break and I think that was the longest we' actually ever broken up and then we were like we either need to really make this work or we just need to stop need to stop can't go on anymore so yeah so I sorry that we couldn't give you a better answer like it was all roses but like it was hard like we can't there was a lot of love and I think that's why it was quite passionate art arguments because we loved each other so much it was very clear but it was also really hard of like trying to make a healthy balance the thing is like cuz there's a point in the Dilemma which is like you're growing up so through probably like through the ages of like 16 to like 21 like you grown dramatically drastically have changed look at Casey the person that she was at 16 17 even now like she's so it's like you're both growing up and changing together so you could easily be like completely changing in a way that's like you're no longer compatible or you could be like yeah you never know like so it's really it's really tough my my advice for like um that I always wish I could have told myself this or at least acted like this like I was always so heartbroken and emotional as if it was like the final end but I'm like I just wish I'd been a little bit more laidback of like just going with the flow a bit more of like you know like I think my expectations of you and wanting to be with each other all the time like I don't know I think I wish I'd just been a little bit more chill a little bit more relaxed and what's meant to be will be but I thought know maybe we wouldn't have been together if I had that attitude or don't know I find it hard because I do feel like a lot of time I do feel like we're exception to the role with how long we've stayed together and all the stuff we've gone through so I even say this to the girls because I know like with Casey and Grace they they feel a little bit of pressure again like we haven't put that pressure on them but they've they've naturally felt pressure that they want to find someone and be some only someone you know like how we were but I'm like it wasn't what you see today is not what the relationship was like we fully had to grow as individuals as parents in a couple like and like you know it's been really tough like it's not and I think having Sophie um and and also my brother passing away we've had such big things thrown at us that it also pushed us to really be together as well to get through it so yeah yeah well yeah I don't know if that's helped or not it's very difficult it's so individual but yeah I think I think just just focus on trying to grow yourself and hope that if you both make some effort to it's meant to be it will be if it's not it won't yeah anyway that is all we have time for so guys if you haven't already please subscribe to the channel and if you could rate and review us if you're listening to this on audio it massively helps and uh we'll see you next Tuesday see you next Tuesday guys bye