#19 Tokyo Time - Tully Kearney

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withdraw from Rio a few weeks before we were supposed to fly out and I didn't think it' ever be physically possible for me to swim again so this is unreal like I never thought this would be an option for me so tell us a little bit about what happened five years ago and why you weren't able to to make the team in Brazil so I've been struggling with a shoulder injury before the world championships and we were dealing with it in the typical athlete way was steroid injections not really treating the problem because we didn't have time just sing through it and dealing with it as we went along um and fortunately it kept coming back um through the next season and it triggered um a massive progression in my distonia so unfortunately my distonia got a lot worse and it was so bad that I couldn't physically move so I couldn't couldn't swim I'd lost a lot of movement in my arms a lot of mov in my legs and I just wasn't physically able to swim anymore and what does that do for yourself mentally when you've got these goals you've trained so hard for this moment and it's been something you've worked towards and suddenly it's snatched away yeah it it was horrible definitely the worst thing I've experienced I think not only did I have to withdraw lose my place in the National F Center lose my funding but also I had to relearn how to try and live independently how to try and do day-to-day tasks coming to terms with the fact that I was now way more disabled than I was before so all of those things trying to deal with them all at once was yeah extremely difficult and it took me a good few years to get past that so how did you bring about this turnaround what did you do what were you able to do so for the first year I just focused on trying to get my pain under control I had um constant nerve pain um which was really difficult because every time I tried to move or do something I was just in too much pain so I I didn't swim for about a year just focused on my University um just focused on trying to learn how to live independent again and learn how to do things differently with my increased level of impairment and then I was spending quite a lot of time back at home in birmingh with my mom and my old swimming coach started a master swimming group so all of the parents of the kids that I used to swim and were uh join this group and they were swimming with my mom and my mom convinced me I was really nervous because at that point I thought well it's better not to know if I can't swim than to try and to fail I thought that trying to swim and realizing I couldn't would be worse than not even trying at all but eventually she managed to change my mind I came around and went to the pool and it was a brilliant atmosphere being with people that I knew people that were really supportive and encouraging um I got back in and I was really embarrassed at first and I was really worried I wasn't quite sure what my body could cope with u and what what I could physically do but over time I just slowly slowly built up um I started training with with a swimming club in Manchester at the same pool but just upstairs from the last front center the coach was brilliant we worked really well together um and it got me to the point of European championships got me back on a team which was just absolutely incredible um and then I had shoulder surgery so 2019 was not not the best season but I still managed to perform go to Worlds and it was an absolute dream come true so it's it's been it's been a difficult road but I'm really lucky to have such great support from my family the swimming clubs at home swimming clubs here my University mmu supported me the wholeway through and honored my scholarship um that meant that I could get physio support snc support and build all the foundations that I needed to be able to swim so without all these people helping me I would never have been able to do this now you are able to say you're going to be a par Olympian which obviously is a fantastic achievement what goes through your head when you're in full flight when you're swimming how does it make you feel well I think I think for me I've always been a very natural racer which is definitely a good quality to have with having a condition like the St you're not always um feeling great or struggling with injuries and things it's definitely good to be able to get in that natural race zone so I think for me as soon as I get behind the block soon as the goggles go on the whistle goes that's just I'm just straight in the zone I'm just focusing solely on on the race and I absolutely love it I love the adrenaline rush and I love all the feel that you get with racing at a massive meet obviously 2016 just wasn't my time and hopefully Tokyo is T in action in the women's 200 meter freestyle on the opening day Wednesday with the final around 12:30 UK time this is Tokyo time from anything but footy the Olympic and Par Olympic sport podcast follow for more from the 2020 games in 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