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cold feet good girls don't come last written by Jennifer Youngblood narrated by Lori West wake up and face the truth you know that nightmare where you're back in high school and standing by your locker you look down horrified to realize that you don't have a stitch of clothing on and everyone is staring all you can think is why did I eat that double decker brownie piled with two scoops of ice cream last night it went straight to my hips and I have no way to hide it or the one where you're supposed to take a test in 5 minutes but you haven't studied a lick for it in fact you didn't even remember that you were taking the class or how about the one where you're crossing the street and you can see a car coming from far away in the distance you try to move but your legs are heavier than a pregnant hippo and you have concrete blocks welded to your feet well that's how I feel the sad part is that it's not a dream but my life 5 years ago when I struck out for New York all Starry Eyed and ready to take on the Fashion World I never imagined that I'd be back home in Comfort Alabama living with my parents I'm single jobless and and have the social life of a Hermit pretty sad when the only thing I have to look forward to this weekend is binge watching The Bachelor I know it's pathetic that I somehow find it entertaining to watch a gaggle of women trying to Peck their way into one man's heart in my defense I couldn't help it that the store I poured my heart and soul into for the past three years closed when investors decided to go a different direction I had worked with my staff to increase the numbers and we did through much blood sweat tears and a multitude of sidewalk sales in the end all our hard work went down the drain because some suits sitting around a polished boardroom table decided to put their resources into another box store and go with the stack it high and sell it cheap mentality maybe I shouldn't have caved and let Mom talk me into coming home she caught me at a low moment when my landlord was busting my chops about being laid on my portion of the rent also I had just gone into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich and was grossed out by the mountain of dirty dishes piled in the sink my former roommate mity would rather have a root canal than wash a dish normally it wasn't too much of a problem because mity was a runway model who never ate more than the few morsels required to keep her alive however Mitsy had just gotten passed over for an audition and chose to drown her Sorrow by making Pasta Prima Vera 3 days prior the dried sauce was so crusty that it looked like the dishes were covered in scabs mom happened to call and I broke down balling like a baby telling her that my life was in Ruins come home mom soothed you can regroup and make a plan what can I say I'm a wimp I caved now I realized the gravity of my error I should have stuck it out in New York I could have gotten a job at another clothing store working retail sure it would have been tough to start at the bottom of the totem pole again but at least I would have been in control of my life eventually I could have found another management position why did I let my rotten circumstances get the best of me because because the bed in my old apartment wasn't nearly as comfortable as this one I murmur as I sink deeper into the covers and channel my mind into a pleasant dream that I float into like a bird taking refuge in a soft Cloud I'm walking on a beach in Hawaii the sun shining like a bright Copper Penny feels so deliciously good on my face the hunk striding toward me is shirtless his bronze muscles Shimmer in almost as much as the Silvery ocean his eye catches mine as he smiles the next thing I know the covers are being ripped from my body what's going on I shriek good morning Mom Chimes as she trapes over to the window and pulls back the drapes to let in a blinding splash of Morning Sun time to get up always one to come out swinging indignant words fly from my my mouth like razor tipped arrows it's not time to get up it's only I can tort my body around to the nightstand and fumble for my phone 8:30 I mumble as my eyes bulge holy cow is it really 8:30 I can't remember the last time I've slept this long I'm normally out of bed by seven at the latest a merciless headache throbs across the bridge of my nose with the for of a prize box are going for the winning knockout I want to just close my eyes and block out the world instead I sit up and rake the hair from my face maybe it wasn't such a good idea to Gorge my Blues with two fudge Walnut brownies and a half gallon of vanilla ice cream no wonder I was having nightmares about being Stark naked with thunder thighs I must have gone into a sugar coma stringy bangs crowd my eyes reminding me that I'm overdue for a haircut a fact that my mom has been reminding me of since I got back into town I'll set you up an appointment with Sheila or one of the other girls at the beauty salon mom has offered a dozen times yeah right like I'm going to go to the curl up or die beauty salon to get my hair done no thanks I'll come out looking like a Pomeranian Poodle I rub my eyes which are scratchier than sandpaper trying to erase the cobwebs of sleep from my brain the sight of mom so cheerful and put together makes my stomach churn mom is one of those people who's so perpetually happy that she's annoying while some women get their eyebrows tattooed on I swear that mom must have gotten her smile tattooed on because it hardly ever wavers with her chestnut hair almond colored eyes and petite bills people say that the two of us are dead ringers however I've got a good five to seven extra pounds on me due to stress and well life mom has managed to whittle away the extra pounds from her figure due to her regimented routine of yoga the occasional visit to a plastic surgeon oh and the fact that she hasn't eaten a french fries since she was 12 if only I had a kernel of Mom's self-control I'd probably be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company instead of an outof workor retail store manager when Mom turned 57 she chopped off her shoulder length hair so it wouldn't drag down her features but left it longer and fluffy on top her highlights are as fresh and perfect as her makeup she's one of those quintessential Southern Bells who gets dressed up to go to the grocery store or even outside to check the mail a few months ago right after Christmas when a friend of Mom's passed away in a car accident I happened to be home visiting for the holidays at the time and overheard mom chatting with one of her friends who was a mutual member of the Lake Pines Women's Club they were talking about how impressed they were with the funeral home that did Judy's makeup and decided that when they eventually kick the bucket they would make sure that their loved ones enlist the services of said Funeral Home pretty typical of women in the South to put on a show to the very end sadly for my mom her only child yours truly did not fall in her footsteps of thinking that everything has to be perfect all the time yes I love fashion and design but I'm not going to flip my gourd if I have to go out of the house without makeup on occasion I like to eat what I want and go casual in jeans and a t-shirt when the situation warrant when I'm in a rut I want to sit around in my grubby clothes eating ice cream and watching Netflix is that such a crime sure my hair needs trimming but I'll get around to it eventually mom's eyes are brimming with an excitement that makes me nervous there is no telling what hairbrain scheme mom has cooked up in her Restless mind whenever I come home even for a short visit I become mom's Pet Project now that I'm home for an interminable amount of time things are bound to get hairy mom brings her hands together and launches in with so are you ready to start your new life her juicy voice reeks of over ripness what do you mean I asked carefully as I moisten my lips do you remember how we talked about you doing alterations until you could find something more permanent yeah I study her through skeptical eyes the alterations gig was Mom's idea I went along with it because I didn't want to start off my stay at home by disagreeing with everything that she says however I'm not sure if I'm kosher with the idea of doing alterations for the rest of my life on the other hand I could use the money even though I'm living at home I want to feel like I'm making my own way it would be humiliating to have to ask my parents to borrow a few bucks Buck just so I can grab something to eat at a restaurant or purchase Ben and Jerry's ice cream I've got your first client mom squeals I scrunch my nose who hesitancy fills her expression don't get upset it's amazing how fast those three little words get the blood pumping through my body they are a red flag waving in front of a sleep deprived sugar overloaded B what did you do she starts talking fast did you know that kitty Williams serves on the board with me at the Lake Pines Women's Club no I wasn't aware of that tidbit because I don't make a habit of keeping up with Mom's charitable organizations she heads up several of them it's her hobby something to keep herself occupied while dad runs his Law Firm yes I answer figuring it's easier to just go along with it well I happened to mention that you were coming back home and kitty said that Colette was looking for someone to alter her wedding dress mom's voice is high pitched and she's talking a mile a minute I don't have to be a genius to know where this was going it's written all over mom's face my jaw hits the bed and ricochets back to my teeth as the air flies out of my lungs faster than the lead car at the Daytona 500 Colette's getting married the world begins to spin and I want to throw up to who I only thought I'd hit rock bottom when I left New York from the sound of this things are about to get a whole lot worse mom's expression is both surprised and concerned I thought you said you were over Gavin I am I growl I was over him years ago traitorous tears threatened to pull in my eyes but I win the battle and swallow them back down that's right Mom affirms you were head over heels with the doctor she speaks the words with fervor like she's trying to convince herself as much as me I suspect that's because she feels the need to ease her conscience over getting me in such a pickle with Colette Williams she pauses as if collecting her thoughts what was his name who I squeak it's hard to breathe and my mind is swimming in a stagnant pool of unrealized expectations mom looks at me funny the doctor her brows crease as she studies me with those perceptive eyes that have the power to unleash more of my secrets than the most sophisticated lie detector test ever could are you okay you're looking a little green around the gills I'm fine I assert shooting her a death glare his name's Marshall I thrust out through gritted teeth there was a brief period of time when I was enamored with Marshall Davis I had thought that maybe the two of us might have a future together until Marshall announced that he'd signed up as a volunteer physician in Ghana the slot was initially supposed to be for six weeks while I was disappointed that Marshall was leaving I put on a brave face and told myself that it was only for a few weeks then six weeks turned into several months until finally I got an email not a phone call mind you but a measly email from Marshall telling me that he'd fallen in love with one of the nurses on his team oh who cares about Marshall his hair was always parted a little too straight for me anyway he's one of those guys who so busy saving the world that he's forgotten how to actually live the sad truth is that Marshall was a placeholder for the only guy who's ever really claimed my heart so Gavin's marry and Colette I have to say the words to make myself believe them please let this be a bad dream yes Mom utters quietly before taking in a long breath I'm sorry but I really did think you were overg gav or I wouldn't have volunteered you for the job with the snap of imaginary fingers her expression changes what's done is done I suppose mom says pleasantly as she Smooths a hand over her cream colored slacks I know you and Colette didn't get along all that well in high school but it's time for you to start fresh blood is rushing so profusely to my head that I wonder if it will pop off my neck and launch clear up to space no I nearly shout I'd rather be T and feathered before I work on a dress for kette Williams Colette and I were on the cheerleading squad in high school while we'd never been close friends we got along okay until I beat out Colette for the head cheerleader position from that moment on Colette hated my guts I wouldn't put it past her to marry Gavin just to spite me I had heard through the gra a few months ago that Colette and Gavin had gone on a date or two but I didn't think it would go anywhere I figured Gavin was too smart to get mixed up with a high maintenance Diva evidently I was wrong mom sits down beside me on the bed and places a hand over mine her voice is practical determined as she squeezes look this is a good opportunity it'll get your foot in the door people listen to kitty a recommend a from her is as good as gold mom gives me a pleading look which only she can perfect please it would mean a great deal to me if you do this one Teensy thing I hate it when Mom goes all soft and contrite on me while she Prides herself on being an outstanding president of charitable organizations she missed her calling she should have been a hostage negotiator given enough time time and persuasion mom has always been able to mold me and every other person she has a mind to influence like putty I feel myself getting pinned into a corner with no hope of an escape fine I'm mutter I'll do the stupid alteration I raise an eyebrow but it had better not be too involved fantastic mom exalts as she stands you'd better hurry Colette and Kitt will be here at 9: a hard laugh scratches my throat of course they will be I Grumble I had known from the minute mom waled into my room that she had something up her sleeve I'm going to get in the shower and I'm taking all the time I need I add mentally if Colette and kitty get here before I'm done getting ready they can just wait I level a glare daring mom to disagree she fr sounds it's never a good idea to keep clients waiting fighting the urge to scream I point toward the door just go see you downstairs mom Chimes as she hurriedly leaves the room my headache is now a thousand times worse with every throb it feels like someone has taking a chisel to my brain my stomach growls and I roll my eyes seriously how can I possibly be hungry after last night's Gorge session my stomach had better get a grip because I certainly can't keep caving to its demands or I'll need a new wardrobe before the month's end I can't believe that Gavin is getting married to Colette the world has gone mad a feeling of deep sadness washes over me but I immediately Tamp it down maybe this is a good thing Gavin's moving on with his life if he wants to marry Colette and be one of those Instagram husbands whose only ambition in life is to capture the perfect snapshot of his demanding wife then so be it Colette has deemed herself an influencer and has a smattering of a following she's constantly doing hair and makeup tutorials not that I've paid much attention mind you I just happen to see a few of her posts Gavin however is a different story I'm not proud to admit this but in my weaker moments I have resorted to stalking him on social media interesting that he hasn't put up any pictures of him and Colette and his profile status is still listed as single trust me I know because I checked it two days ago it's not hard to see why Colette Williams is itching to get her claws into Gavin but why is he settling for her Gavin could have anyone he wants too bad he doesn't want me my brain shouts Gavin has always been a chick magnet even back in high school as if his looks and Charming personality weren't enough to seal the deal he had the Accolade of being a star athlete to boot now that he owns the local hardware store and a healthy share of rental property both commercial and residential his appeal is bound to shoot To The Moon an image of G gav flashes through my mind I've always loved the Reckless vibe that Gavin's dark brown messy hair gives him add to that his arresting honey green eyes rugged features and quick smile and it's not hard to figure out why I've had a hard time getting over him Gavin could always make me laugh he taught me not to take myself too seriously in short I liked the person I was when I was with him this is ridiculous I can't keep wallowing in self-pity what did I expect that I'd wall back home and find Gavin waiting for me with open arms that only happens in cheesy romance novels this is no romance novel and I'm certainly no heroine I'm a washed up fashionista wannabe with an overzealous mother who couldn't stay out of my business if her life depended on it and now like it or not I'm about to alter the wedding dress of my High School Arch Enemy who's engaged to my former boyfriend my biggest regret the itch I never could scratch the one man who shattered my heart into a thousand pieces and then walked out of my life without so much as a parting glance a fine morning this is turning out to be I growl as I stalk toward the shower it's time for this girl to wake up and face the truth Gavin has officially moved moved on now I need to do the same the question is how good grief it's only a pin prick when I slink down the steps my hair is still damp I find Mom Kitty and Colette waiting for me in the den like vultures sharpening their claws there she is Mom gushes in a voice that has the Trill edge of an opera singer off key she smiles in relief like she was afraid I was going to make a run for the door rather than face this incredibly awkward situation she's put me in a syrupy smile drizzles over Kitty's lips well hello welcome home sugar she says grandly Kitty is one of those Country Club women whose appearance and home look like a Pinterest post everything about her is disgustingly perfect in an I'm better than you way kette looks fabulous as always with her long platinum hair and even features she's tall and as skinny as a rail normally I would consider Colette's body size and type a blessing after all it's relatively simple to fit a dress to someone who has a near perfect figure however since it's Colette we're talking about out I can't think of one good thing that could possibly come from this project I press a tight smile over my face the one I've used many times when dealing with difficult customers hello I nod as I sit down in the nearest chair I can feel Colette assessing me and have to fight the urge to scowl at her thank you so much for taking us on last minute Kitty begins we had an appointment set up with Margaret Bradshaw but she had to leave town suddenly when her sister passed away that's terrible about Margaret's sister I mumble while I don't know Margaret super well the town of comfort is small enough that I know nearly everything about her her husband died a couple years prior and her children are all grown and live in different states at any rate I feel sorry for her situation yes it is Kitty says absently like she couldn't care less her flippant attitude about another person's distress makes me dislike Kitty Williams even more I can't for the life of me understand why Mom puts up with her drama Kitty purses her lips and adopts a Pious expression your mother told me about the store closing and you losing your job that must have been tough you had such high hopes about conquering the world you worked so hard and now here you are back home I'm so sorry she purs rather than answering I pin mom with a look that says do you seriously expect me to work for these people mom shoots me an apologetic look as nervous laughter trembles from her lips then her voice takes on the edge of a knife blade as she turns to Kitty Albany is one of the most talented and determined people I know yes it's been hard for her to come home but I have no doubt that she'll land on her feet wow go mom I stifle a grin mom just put kitty Williams in her place faster than the woman could blink maybe Mom has more fire in her belly than I thought of course Kitty sooes as a cheery smile curves her lips the smile is so wide that it probably would have filled her entire face had she not been injected with so much Botox Kitty's face is so set that not even an earthquake could jiggle her features thanks I murmur surprised by Mom's compliment it boosts my courage a little and prompts me to sit up taller in my seat will I land on my feet I'll certainly try if you're looking for a job Colette can put in a good word for you at the bank she's not the assistant manager Kitty finishes with a note of Pride I turn my attention to Colette and can tell from her smirk that I would be the last person she would ever put in a good word for the two of us meet eyes The Grudge between us is as alive As It Ever Was maybe even stronger than before except this time the tables are turned Colette has the upper hand now because she's marrying Gavin she enjoys seeing me so low and dejected she knows what it'll cost me to alter her wedding dress if you work at the bank then I'm surprised you're here during working hours it's my day off Colette replies stiffly I don't have to look at Mom to know that she's given me the evil eye she hates it when I get confrontational rule number one of the Southern Bell's handbook states that a woman should never cause a scene you can be as caddy as you please but you must keep a smile fixed firmly on your face and level your Jabs with gential civility thanks for the offer I say easily but I think I'll strike out on my own with the alterations yikes did I really say that I don't want to do alterations but I refuse to let Colette Williams and her snoody mother get the best of me this time I dare to steal a glance at mom she gives me a look that says cut out the shenanigans Mom's right I'm acting juvenile there's too much bad blood between me and Colette to behave in any other way I'm finding it hard to believe that Colette would agree to have me alter her wedding dress which makes me think that she's here to rub her engagement to Gavin in my face well her evil plan is working I'm so Green With Envy that I could make the Wicked Witch of the West look pale in comparison okay time to stop wallowing in pity and get this show on the road what do you need done I motioned to the garment bag draped over Colette's lap I need the dress taken in Colette sniffs Kitty Chuckles you can't believe how hard it is to find a dress that's small enough to fit Colette she cuts her eyes at me with a clear insinuation that I'm a blob of lard yeah I get it I've let myself go I need to get back into shape both physically and mentally an awkward silence passes and I realize that everyone is waiting for me to speak sure I can take the dress in I respond evenly what's your time frame when's the wedding I hold my breath waiting for the answer I'd like to know when the door will officially close on any last chance I have with Gavin I know it's silly for me to think in those terms because my chance with Gavin was gone a long time ago he made sure of that when he broke up with me still the knowledge hits me Square between the eyes like a sledgehammer that my idiotic heart has been holding out hope that somehow the two of us might get back together Kitty and Colette look at one another as soon as possible Kitty answers I've never wanted to be a mind reader more than I have at this very moment what silent information just passed between Kitty and Colette I sniff out the [ __ ] in their armor like a hound dog on the trail of a rabbit have you not set a date hope Kindles in my breast maybe Gavin is stallin color r es to Colette's face her Fair complexion makes her look like she's the spawn of a tomato she clasps her hands in her lap we haven't set a date yet I make a face really H that's interesting rage ignites over Colette's perfect features her words come out in a hiss just what do you mean by that Victory swells in my chest ah ha Colette still rises easily to the bait evidently she never learned the first rule of Southern bell etiquette about not causing a scene Mom starts blinking fast like she's about to pass out alony she cautions as she touches her hair that's enough I asked you a question Colette demands through clenched teeth if Colette wants an answer then by golly she's going to get it right here and right now my voice goes sugary sweet I only meant that Gavin can be elusive the fastest way to send him running for the hills is to try and pin him down I know that from sad experience I beg your pardon Kitty inserts as she throws me a scolding glare before placing a reassuring hand over Colette's I shrug you wanted an answer so I gave you one kitty turns to Mom I thought you said that almany has changed for a second I can't believe my ears has my mother really thrown me under the bus I take one look at her sheepish expression and know it's true seriously you told her that my voice Rises but I don't care as if there was something wrong with me before I rub a hand over my forehead disgusted with the whole situation you know what this isn't going to work you'll have to get someone else to alter the dress there is no one else Kitty protests her voice fluttering with panic I Rise to my feet but Mom holds out her hand Albany calm down her voice is firmer than the mattress at my New York apartment sit back down and let's discuss this like rational adults Kitty and Colette need the dress altered you need a job just tell them your price a hysterical giggle chokes my throat this is insane how much will you charge mom demands I do a quick mental calculation and then tack on 20% for the pain in the neck fee eight $75 kitty's eyes bulge that's outrageous Margaret was only charging us 235 I flash a tight smile well since you don't have a date set for the wedding maybe you should just wait until Margaret returns so she can do the alteration mom gives me a pleading look really is $875 the lowest you can go be reasonable it's not about the money it's the principle of the situation yep that's it I clip when can you have it done Kitty asks dang it I was hoping the high price would be enough to make kitty change her mind evidently not the woman is as Relentless as my mother maybe more so I would estimate 2 to 3 weeks but I won't know for sure until Colette tries the dress on so I can see what I'm dealing with okay kitty sigh resolutely let's do it let's go downstairs to the workroom mom says it sounds so official to hear mom say workroom when referring to the combination exercise and craft room before I left for New York I used the space as a work room but that was eons ago the good news is that my old sewing machine is still down there I guess I'll have to brush off the dust and hope the dinosaur door still works when we get to the basement I motion to the bedroom located off to the side you can change in there I'll help Kitty says as she and Colette go into the bedroom the second they close the door mom whirls around what's the matter with you she seeds I don't know what you mean I snip as I lift my chin I'm trying to help you and you're throwing it in my face did you really think that I would be okay with doing the alterations on Colette Williams's dress I feel my face go flush she and I can't stand each other mom raises an eyebrow this has nothing to do with an old Grudge you still have feelings for Gavin that's ridiculous I spit I couldn't care less what Gavin mallister does I jerk my thumb toward the door if he wants to marry that bird brained twit then so be it mom shakes her head a look of weariness settling over her I don't know what to do with you I can almost read mom's mind she thinks I'm an odd duck and wishes I was more like my childhood best friend Penelope Primrose whom I used to tease about being practically perfect in every way it's not your job to fix everything keep your voice down mom warns I take in a quick breath fighting to keep my voice even you and I both know that this isn't going to end well with Colette she won't be pleased with my work no matter what I do give her a chance to prove you wrong Mom urges I think you may be happily surprised she steals her jaw and for the record you don't need Gavin mallister you're much better off without him I know how Mom's brain works I can practically see the wheels turning in her head she's trying to make me feel better about Gavin take away the sting from him dumping me yes I say Dolly you're right the door opens and Colette and kitty emerge my eyes pop when I see Colette's wedding dress it's Exquisite a designer vintage style that probably cost more than I could make in a year doing alterations well the dress would be Exquisite if it weren't hanging on Colette Kitty's right except for her boobs Colette is a toothpick I don't think I've ever been that skinny not even when I was 12 For Better or Worse my figure is curvy it dings through my brain that Colette didn't have boobs in high school she's always been straight as a board I don't have to be a brainchild to know that she's had a boob job from the looks of Colette's sculpted nose I'd say she's also had a nose job while there are things about my body that I'm not crazy about I'm 100% natural right down to my well-endowed chest and I have the larger arms and wider back to prove it women with naturally larger chests have the framework to hold them up Mom jumps into helpful mode I'll get the safety pins the measuring tape and a pad and pen for you to write down the measurements thanks I say tonelessly my heart aches I'm disappointed with myself for feeling so dejected Mom's right I am better off without Gavin I still can't believe he's marrying Colette he used to poke fun at her in high school for being such a spoiled brat saying that he wouldn't wish Colette Williams on his worst first enemy what the heck has happened to him I guess I've been away for too long mom returns a couple minutes later with the goods as I get to work pinning the dress for a few seconds I forget that I'm working on Colette's dress is my love for the art of sewing takes Center Stage I'm so focused on my work that I don't even realize that mom and kitty have stepped off to the side jabbering about the latest gossip surrounding members of the Lake Pines Women's Club leaving me and Colette alone Gavin was so sweet with his proposal Colette begins interrupting my thoughts my insides freeze he took me to mobile to this quaint little Italian restaurant Colette's voice has an annoying sing song quality I'm so used to the rapid clip of the New York accent that to my ears Colette sounds like she's acting out a poor attempt of scarlet O'Hara on the stage he even paid a violin player to serenus as he got down on one knee and popped the question I probably should remind Colette that it's not smart to poke The Hornet's Nest when the hornet in question is holding an open safety pin I hope this isn't too awkward for you Colette continues it's all I can do to force my voice to sound neutral what do you mean Colette Chuckles I know it was tough when Gavin broke up with you it's good to see that you've moved on her voice brightens who are you dating now mom said you were head over heels for some doctor but then he dumped you and ran off to a third world country I'm so sorry she CS it's interesting how things turn out you were the queen of the crop back in high school and now she shrugs her angular shoulders well well it's just interesting one little prick with the needle is all it would take I look longingly at the satin fabric nope I'd better not do it I'm in enough hot water with mom as it is still it would be so satisfying to give Colette a jab with the pin it would serve her right for gloating talk about kicking a girl when she's down Colette is merciless I can help you find a date if you'd like it's the least I can do did she really just say that thanks I hum but I'm good Gavin's taking me to Maui on our honeymoon an invisible fist clutches my stomach when Gavin and I were together he promised that one day he'd take me to Maui it was something we dreamed about together it became our imaginary place the spot where everything would converge in Perfection I can't believe he's taken Colette there it's the ultimate betrayal rage burns like a blowtorch through my veins I move the pin into striking position don't do it the angel on my shoulder urges what have you got to lose the devil on my other shoulder argues I suspect that Colette knows that Maui was mine and Gavin's favorite daydream that's why she insists on tormenting me about it did you hear what I said Colette prompts in the pompous tone of one who has the World by its tail Gavin's taking me to my she squeals when I jab the pin into her hip I take it out as fast as the pin goes in Colette whirls around and raged you did that on purpose her eyes bulge as she twists her head around to inspect the damage the small red circle of Blood on the white satin fabric is evidence of my dastardly deed mom and kitty rush over what's going on Kitty demands she pricked me Colette whales look there's blood on my dress oops I utter contritely my hand must have slipped that's it Kitty seeds we are are out of here she turns to Mom you're a good person and friend Sable too bad I can't say the same about your horrible daughter she shoots me a look so blistering that it's a wonder it doesn't cause the skin to peel right off my bones mom's face is as pale as a statue to the point where I almost feel sorry for her almost until I remind myself that this whole debacle is her fault let's go kitty growls but I need to get this thing off to get the Blood Out Colette protests otherwise my dress will be ruined run it under cold water I suggest it'll do the trick every time Colette gets up in my face her words fly out in a hissy saliva droplets splattering on my skin you're a monster she grunts you'll get what's coming to you soon enough I have no idea what Colette's talking about and I don't want to know I'm so done with Colette Williams I roll my eyes as I take a step back and wipe her disgusting spit off my face good grief I don't see what the big deal is it was only a pin prick chunky monkey I need ice cream and I need it now I pull into the first open parking space I can find at the Piggly Wiggly to say that Mom is ticked would be the understatement of the year after Kitty and Colette stormed out of the house mom broke into a tiate of alony Jane Featherstone I don't get you you take everything I try and do for you and throw it back in my face therein lies the problem for all her good qualities my mom is selfish she believes that everything revolves around her I tried to explain that my beef with Colette has nothing to do with Mom but she just doesn't get it then when I thought things couldn't get worse mom announced that she'd set me up on a blind date for tomorrow night with some podiatrist from mobile named Wallace Bogart III after that little stunt you just pulled you owe me mom seeed before marching off and barricading herself in her bedroom that's when I decided to take a trip to the Piggly Wiggly and get some much needed supplies starting with ice cream lots of it the nerve of mom setting me up with some podiatrist ew the last thing I want to do is go out with some pretentious podiatrist also what was mom thinking with the alteration thing she knows that I was heartbroken when Gavin broke up with me how could mom have thought that I would alter Colette's dress maybe all of that hairspray that Mom insists on caking onto her hair has eaten through her scalp and destroyed her brain cells I grab a buggy and make a beeline for the frozen food section I pass a couple of people on the way it doesn't register in my brain that they are smiling and nodding a greeting until I get past them and new New York it's rude to make eye contact with strangers here it's the norm I'm sure the two people I passed think I'm a snob for ignoring them I'll have to remember to be more congenial Albany chane I heard you were back in town a voice says from behind me great just what I need right now to have to make small talk Plastering a smile over my lips i' turn around hello I say with genuine sincerity relieved that the person standing in front of me is Fern Primrose the mother of my former best friend Penelope or pen as she likes to be called I guess I shouldn't say that pen is my former best friend that makes it sound like we had a fallen out we didn't we just drifted apart as people do I went to New York Penn stayed in comfort and ended up marrying Timothy Norwood one of The Darlings of the town the Norwoods are the closest thing that we have to royalty in Comfort Alabama their ancestors were one of the found in families Timothy and Penn Live in a mansion in the historical section of town that has been in Timothy's family for Generations my Practically Perfect friend finally got her Practically Perfect life picket fence neat rows of flowers and all how are you Fern asks an automatic reply blips from my lips fine I'm glad to hear it Fern says with a smile it has been a long time since I've seen Fern she's frailer than I remember and her hair has gone completely gray actually it's more of a snow white color it's attractive and Suits her I decide Fern's face is lined the edges of her eyes ruffled in deep wrinkles she's around the same age as my mom M but she looks at least a decade older in Fern's defense she has fibromyalgia her health has always been tenuous even when I was back in high school she works as a librarian for the elementary school whenever I think of fern I picture her with a book in hand her husband left her for another woman when Penn and her older brother Bo were kids to my knowledge Fern has never dated or gotten involved with anyone else else I've always liked Fern she has an aura of contentment about her that few people ever find in this life Fern strikes me as being happy with herself and her life she's not one to constantly go searching for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow but rather has the rare perceptiveness to realize that the Brilliance of the rainbow itself is the true gift Fern leaves her buggy and infolds me in a hug I catch a whiff of baby powder and some something fruity probably her shampoo I'm so glad you're back she breathes thanks I'm Mumble wishing I could say the same when I was in New York I was so sure of my place in the world now I feel like someone has taken my life shoved it in a blender and turned the speed on high and I'm supposed to make sense of whatever concoction comes out on the other side she gives me a search and look have you seen pen yet no Fern looks disappointed it's been hectic since I've been home I lie and then wince inwardly lightning is going to strike me dead right here between the produce and Deli sections of the Piggly Wiggly you'll have to stop by her features tighten pen could use a good friend right now my brows tug together is everything okay it's uncanny how quickly my sympathies rise even after all this time I still feel a sense of protectiveness over pen yeah she's good she's settling into marriage and trying to make the Norwood Mansion her home a wistful smile drifts over Fern's lips pan is just wound up so tight she needs to relax and look at the big picture rather than getting bogged down with all of the social drama I tell her that she should take time for herself and start painting again she pauses I wish pen were more like you more outspoken more willing to follow her dreams I try to squelch the startled laughter that rises in my throat but it escapes out as a half squeak me I don't feel like a success I feel like I'm starting over at the bottom a new revelation hits me and I discover the root of the problem in my life pen and I have the wrong mothers had mine and Penn's birthdays not been two months apart I would have sworn we were Switched at the hospital what my mother would give to have Practically Perfect pen as her daughter instead of me I guess paring Penning me with opposites was Nature's Way of evening out the playing field thank you I sang to Fern still trying to process her compliment a second later I noticed the expression on Fern's face there's some sort of worry or secret behind Fern's eyes that lets me know that pen is not okay I run my mind through a list of possible problems Health marriage job infertility surely pen isn't considering having a baby she and Timothy have been married for less than a year they're still in the newly wed phase I would think it would be tough enough to adjust to marriage without adding a baby into the mix then again what do I know I'm certainly no relationship expert and I'm Dreadful at listening to the intuition of my inner voice ever since I came home I've had the nagging feeling that I needed to go and see pen I just couldn't make myself do it thinking it would be too hard to see pen and her perfect life while mine is in shambles hot guilt blankets me I should have listened to that in voice and stopped being so selfish I get so frustrated at Mom because she's so self-centered I guess the Apple doesn't fall far from the tree I need to do better whip myself into shape I'm not this deated girl that life is thrown for a loop I'm a fighter dad gummit I will fight after I've had my ice cream in a long binge session of Netflix I talked to Fern for a few more minutes during which time she makes me promise to go and visit Penn I assure her that I'll go soon curiosity is now pricking at me making me wonder what's wrong with pen surely if it were something devastating like cancer Fern would tell me maybe pen is just down in the dumps it happens to the best of us she's probably trying to come back down to earth after marrying the man of her dreams Penn has been enamored with Timothy Norwood ever since I can remember personally I don't see what the big deal is Timothy is too much of a pretty boy for my taste I shouldn't generalize but it has been my experience that guys born with silver spoons in their mouths end up becoming putes okay that's a bit of an overstatement I guess time will tell if my theory applies to Timothy I hope her pen sake that he'll beat the odds as I passed the meat department a low wolf whis stops me cold what is it with meat departments ever since I was a teenager the guys who work in the meat department get their jollies out of ogling all the girls this would never happen in New York down here it's everyday business although no one has ever been Brazen enough to whistle at me before I turn and scowl the guy behind the counter is sporting a goofy grin hey alony welcome home it takes me a second to merge the image of the hunky guy with my memory my jaw drops M Kenzie holder is that you he holds up his hands as a broad smile tips his lips in the flesh it's Mac now by the way the McKenzie I knew was scrawny and annoying with a whiny voice time has certainly done him good I wheel my buggy closer to the counter so I can talk to him without yelling across the store he looks me up and down with a bold eye of appreciation that instantly gets on my nerves you look great thanks so do you a low chuckle sounds in his throat sounding like he that's what they tell me I fight the urge to laugh Mckenzie was always cocky at least now he has the looks to back it up he's well built and can considering that his shirt is sleeveless I'm getting a great view of his muscles I'm sure that's the intent for McKenzie or Mac to show off his body he reminds me of the cartoon character Johnny Bravo sure he's Pleasant to look at but he doesn't have much upstairs I'm not just saying that because Mac works in the meat department he was dense in high school and I get the feeling that not much has changed hey now that you're back the least I can do is take you out for a beer he speaks as though taking me out would be doing me a favor I moisten my lips sorry but I don't drink it's bad enough for me to be so addicted to ice cream no way am I going to add drinking to that list I like being in control of my own faculties also liquor puts on the pounds I'd rather eat my calories than drink them I can live with that we can get pizza instead how about tomorrow night it's on the tip of my tongue to say no but then I remember the blind date with the podiatrist I reach a fast decision I'll go mom's going to blow a gasket when she realizes I'm going out with McKenzie holder the fish part of me takes a second to gloat over that fact maybe it'll teach mom to stop interfering in my life red he Bellows I'll pick you up at your place tomorrow sounds good nice blouse he Winks uh thanks at least he had the sense to call it a blouse rather than a shirt I can feel his eyes on me as I move away from the counter somehow I get the feeling that I'm going to regret my spur of the- moment decision to say yes to MC holder his learing gaze trumps on my nerves oh well it's just one date and maybe it'll get Mom off my back I'll make my way over to the ice cream section to my dismay there's not a single container of chunky monkey my favorite Ben and Jerry's ice cream left the label is there but the slat shelf or whatever that thing that holds the ice cream is called is empty seriously I Grumble don't they know how to keep things stocked in this town I'm so disapp pointed I could cry my mouth Waters thinking about the silky banana ice cream packed with chunks of fudge and walnuts briefly I consider driving across town to the other grocery store in Comfort the Stop and safe to see if they have chunky monkey no that would be too much of a pain I guess I'll have to make do with the peanut butter world and cookie dough flavors instead I pull open the freezer door and start chucking cartons into the buggy a low chuckle sounds behind me still eating ice cream I see I recognize the melodic voice instantly it melts my insides to sloshing goo as I turn around hey Gavin my eyes flick over him good grief he looks good yeah I'll admit it I'm ogling that'll teach me not to cast judgment on Mac holder Gavin flashes me his trademark lopsided grin the one that has been known to sweep me and half the female population of Comfort off their feet your mom told me you were coming home I figured I'd run into you sooner or later how you doing he looks me up and down with an appreciative eye whereas I resented Max scouring me with his eyes I don't mind so much now that Gavin's doing it my skin goes warm under his scrutiny and I have to fight the urge to adjust my shirt blouse you look great he murmurs my first reaction is that he's being sarcastic but then I realize that he's serious thanks I'm part annoyed part flattered and mostly confused if Gavin is so over the moon for Colette then why is he looking at me with such open admiration I never pegged Gavin as having a Wandering eye then again I never pegged him as ending up with Colette Williams either I guess I've been wrong about a multitude of things I feel like I've been blasted with a tropical heat wave my body must have heated up 10° and my heart is pumping like it's running a marathon it's crazy the effect that Gavin has on me a thousand memories slam through my mind in the flash of an instant I see us huddled together at a bonfire the night before a big football game the two of us sneaking into his Neighbor's Pool and taking midnight swims we used to love to drive to the beach and play in the sand we drive up to Rangers lookoff point and reclin in the back of his pickup truck watching the stars and doing our fair share of kissing until the air would get heavy with the mist of the early morning a wistful longing overtakes me I feel so sad for all that we lost I'm still ticked that Gavin broke up with me I'm infuriated that he's marrying Colette his Jade eyes Zing with laughter as he points to the buggy no chunky monkey Gavin was the one who got me into chunky monkey no I lament it's out it's then that I realize what Gavin is holding in his hand my jaw drops chunky monkey you got the last one how I sputter my brain tries to figure out what's Happening Here is it a coincidence that Gavin got the last container of chunky monkey or did he somehow know I was going for it and beat me to the punch he shrugs you're not the only one who likes chunky monkey I straighten to my full height and pin him with a glare you got the last Carton on purpose I can tell from his sheepish grin that it's true did Gavin see me go into the store did he see me talking to Mack holder what would he think if he knew that I have a date with Mac tomorrow night no I can't go down this road it doesn't matter what Gavin thinks because the two of us are through I don't mind sharing we can grab a couple of spoons from the deli my hand goes to my hip don't you have to get back to the hardware store a lopsided grin tugs at a corner of his lips I'm sure I can convince the boss to give me a few extra minutes for lunch my eyes move up to his messy hair the last time I saw him Gavin had cut it too short now it's longer on top like I like it giving him a boyish Reckless look he's wearing a gray Panther's t-shirt our high school mascot and Faded jeans Gavin is lean with cut muscles he looks more like an all-around athlete rather than a pump you up muscle monkey like mac haha very funny I say dry Gavin owns the hardware store on Main Street and has the Liberty to take as long as he pleases for lunch Adventure pings in his eyes washing them in warm mellow gold what do you say Albany you up for the challenge hey pumps his eyebrows for a second I forget that Gavin is engaged I forget that he broke my heart all I can think is yes I'm up for any challenge that concerns Gavin mallister luckily before I make an absolute idiot of myself the rational side of my brain takes control what about Colette I don't think she'd be happy about her fiance sharing a pint of ice cream with his ex-girlfriend he blinks in Surprise who told you that I was engaged to Colette she did about 30 minutes ago when I was doing the alterations on her wedding dress his eyes round you're doing the alterations on Colette's wedding dress I was until the pen I was holding had an unfortunate encounter with Colette's bony hip startled laughter rises in his throat you jabbed Colette with a pin yeah yep sure did the corners of my lips twitch is it awful that it gives me a streak of satisfaction to admit that he shakes his head back and forth you always were a fireball is that admiration I detect in his voice why does it give me such a swell of satisfaction so how about it let's go eat some ice cream and catch up the longing that I feel makes me angry I don't think so what do you take me for he frowns what are you talking about you're engaged to Colette I remind him Amusement colors his features since when do you care what kette thinks I don't I snap but you should care what she thinks considering that you're marrying her Gavin tips his head and gives me a thoughtful look are you jealous my cheeks Blaze hot don't flatter yourself I retort he grins you are I want to rip the smug expression off his handsome face you and I were over a long time ago I growl he searches my face what did happen between us I hate it when people ask a question that they already know the answer to my anger rages to an INF Inferno as I get up in his face how dare you ask me that you know what happened you gave up on us his face Falls that's not how I remember it an incredulous laugh riddles my throat is that right how do you remember it we took some time apart so that you could go to New York and spread your wings I was only trying to give you space so that you wouldn't have any regrets BL Pony you broke up with me because you wanted the freedom to chase all the skirts you pleased Gavin was a Jacksonville State University on a baseball scholarship I knew that he had droves of girls throwing themselves at him him saying that he wanted to give me space was an excuse to sew his Wild Oats hurt bubbles up in my chest I can feel a wall of Tears pressing behind my eyes but I'll be darned if I let a s single one fall no he counters that's not what happened I gave you space and then you broke it off what he's saying is technically true he wanted space so I gave it to him end of story my head feels like it's on fire I glance around and realize that the older woman at the end of the aisle is staring it's all I can do to keep my voice even as I hold out a hand look it doesn't matter what happened the two of us were over a long time ago it's ancient history he raises an eyebrow if that's so then why is your face so red why are you so upset I'm not upset I nearly shout then swallow hard Gavin has always been able to get my goat one thing I like about him is that he doesn't mind calling my bluff of course this time there's no Bluff he hurt me and he's not going to turn the situation around to pretend that he didn't I'm not doing this with you I take a step back who you choose to marry is your business I mutter just don't expect me to fix her dress speaking of clothes that's an interesting shirt that you have on actually it's a blouse I lift my chin a grin tugs at his lips okay black house that's an interesting look with the bow thing that you've got going his tone is teasing taunting is that some new style that you picked up in New York I look down and want to faint my shirt has come unbuttoned across my boobs somehow don't ask me how the bow on my bra has manage to poke out of my blouse the bow is positioned so perfectly that it looks like I've planned it that way humiliation scalds over me I've been parading around the grocery store with the bow of my bra hanging out no wonder Mac mentioned something about my blouse he probably thought I was trying to solicit him oh my gosh what a day this is turning out to be you're an idiot I see to Gavin as I grab my buggy and flee the scene I turn the corner to the next aisle and only paus long enough to button my blouse no way can I face Gavin again I hurry over to the canned goods aisle and go down it slowly pretending to take interest in the items on the shelves My Hope Is that Gavin will go straight to the checkout line and I won't have to see him again I wait a good 15 minutes or more before Meandering over to the checkout line I would wait longer but I don't want my ice cream to turn into soup G is nowhere in sight thank goodness lookie lookie what the Cat Dragged In dimples pow the cashier purr with a broad grin as I step up to the register I heard you were back in town dimples is close to my mom's age she's a pretty woman in a Gody way with her big hair hoop earrings blue eyes Shadow and fire engine red lipstick how you doing sugar good how are you listen at that Northern accent you've turned into a Yankee she clucks her tongue I told Sable she was jinxing herself when she named you Albany you've had New York in your blood from the time you were a young Sable should have taken a queue from me and named her daughter a southern name I bite back A Smile Like Dixie Dixie is dimples his oldest daughter yeah she laughs as she points a finger now don't be sassing me yes ma'am dimples gives her gum a good goar around as she slides the first Pine of ice cream over the scanner her acrylic fingernails are long and glossy red I don't know how dimples manages to work with them her head swings back and forth you got some guts I tell you that what do you mean honey if I were fixing to parade around in a bathing suit on stage this weekend I sure as heck wouldn't be loading up on all this ice cream I chuckle yeah me neither she gives me a funny look what dimples leans close and lowers her voice don't play dumb with me Missy I know you're signed up to participate in the misc comfort beauty pageant this coming Saturday my throat closes and I can't breathe I make a gurgling sound to clear it there must be some mistake I weak I'm not going to be in the pageant I vaguely remember hearing something about the pageant but I didn't think twice about it sure I was a pageant girl once but that was a lifetime and several pounds ago dimples gives me a Sly look you can act all innocent if you want but summer Heen showed me the roster your name is front and center you want to know who else entered she Whispers before I can under a word she answers her question Colette Williams summer told me that the only reason Colette signed up was because you're in it she's been itching to beat you for years after all you're the only person who holds the honor of winning misc Comfort two years in a row that was a long time ago my blood is thrashing like a washing machine against my temples I know exactly how my name got on that roster because my Medlin mother put it there dimples looks me up and down you're still as beautiful as ever with that long dark hair and those chocolate brown eyes she giggles Colette will be Green With Envy when she sees you that poor girl is a carpenter's Dream well except for those ginormous boobs that she had installed laughter circles through her eyes those things are so large that she could use them for floats I'm surprised she's not having back issues yep like I said Colette will be jealous when she sees you I doubt that I fire back oh she will she laughs I guar darn it her voice swings up who knows you might just win a third time she tilts her head although strawberry lingerfelt is on the roster too have you seen her lately she lets out a low whistle she's a looker with that red hair and those bright green eyes strawberry is several years younger than me the last time I saw her she had her hair and braids was covered in freckles and wearing braces I hope all this ice cream isn't for you dimple says as she puts the last pint into a bag and Rings up my total you've got to look great for this weekend I'll be sure and share with Mom and Dad I joke I slip my card into the reader as dimples jabbers a mile a minute I hardly process a word she says all I can think about is my mom what am I going to do with her I don't want the rest of my time spent at home to be a constant battle my mind is spinning like a kite caught in a hurricane as I drive home as soon as I put the ice cream away I charge into the den mom and dad are sitting side by side on the sofa dad is dressed in his suit and tie I stop in my tracks what are you doing home I figured you'd be at the office he floats mom a doting look I thought I'd take this pretty little thing to lunch mom Giggles like a school girl as her face beams with pleasure dad treats mom like a queen and spoils her rotten it's endearing and sickly sweet how in love the two of them are truthful y I'm glad that my parents are still crazy about each other I just don't feel the love right now because I'm so ticked at mom you want to come with us dad asks as he scoots forward and adjusts his tie my dad is a big man who's all muscle a linebacker in college he's built like a refrigerator his Lively blue eyes are his best feature I would kill to have eyes that color why did I have to get boring brown eyes like Mom Mom dad's hair is going silver around the temples giving him a distinguished look he has a quick silver quality that draws people to him also there's an authenticity about Dad that lets people know they can trust him his genuiness and Cane wit or a winning combination helping him build a successful Law Firm no thanks I laser in on mom as my hand goes to my hip why in the devil did you sign me up to participate in the misc Comfort beauty pageant this weekend mom's face turns cherry red as a nervous laugh escapes her throat her hand goes up to smooth her hair it was a surprise I thought you'd be pleased my voice goes shrill pleased this is a nightmare hold your horses butterbug dad cautions in an even tone sit down and let's talk about this I aim my my wrath at him did you know about this yeah your mother mentioned something about it and I thought it was a good idea seriously I throw my hands in the air y'all are both crazy sit down dad says in a firm tone once you hear the whole story you might decide you want to participate that's not going to happen I spout come on butterbug dad urges sit down fine I tromp over and sit down across from them I fold my arms over my chest glaring at them I don't like how young and immature I feel right now yes they're my parents and I've been brought up to honor and respect them however I'm a grown woman with my own hopes and dreams and I refuse to let my mother Lead Me Around by the nose dad turns to Mom tell her about the pride has money mom straightens in her seat and moistens her lips Norwood Dental is one of the sponsors for The Pageant this year they're offering a $10,000 prize to the winner my jaw hits the floor what the years I won I got a Year's worth of free car washes and a coupon at Piggly Wiggly for 30 bucks I mutter there were a handful of other prizes but they were all small things offered by local stores why in the heck is Norwood Dental putting up a $10,000 prize now I really need to go and visit Penn her husband Tim runs the Norwood dental practice with his father the patent has come a long way since you were in it Mom Chimes she shifts in her seat before Crossing her legs and wrapping her hands around her knees I was thinking that you could use the prize money to open up an alterations shop on Main Street there's a spot opening up right next to the dance studio Gavin owns it she gives me a censuring look that's another reason why I was trying to get you in good with Colette Williams in the hopes that Gavin would give you a good rate laughter tickles my throat well that plan backfired dad frowns what happened mom rolls her eyes your daughter made a spectacle of herself today I got her a job altering Colette's wedding dress and she pricked Colette with a pin just for spite her eyes flash as she throws me a glare dad's eyes widen the second before he bursts out laughing his shoulders heave up and down he laughs so hard that his face turns bright red and tears pull in his eyes before dribbling down his cheeks before long I start laughing too it feels good to break apart the attention inside me don't encourage her Dallas mom blusters as she shoots me a dark look he shakes his head as he sucks in a breath and mops his eyes I'm sorry hun but you should have known better than to expect albony to alter Colette's dress you knew that wasn't going to end well that's what I said $10,000 the possibility rolls through my head H I could use it to get reestablished in New York or I could open my own shop here in Comfort not alterations but a dress shop I could offer upscale Brands as well as a few of my original designs basically I could take the plan for the store I was running and adopt it to comfort I can't believe I'm even considering this option after all how can I possibly stand living in a town where Gavin is married to Colette then again it would give me the opportunity to be self-sufficient there's no way I could start my own store in New York with $10,000 I don't even know if I can do it in comfort for that amount but at least it would be feasible here I guess I'll have to give the idea more thought at any rate winning $10,000 sounds pretty good regardless of what I decide to do with it what's going on in that little head of yours dad asks I [ __ ] my head maybe I will do the pageant even as I say the words I wonder if I stand a chance I wish I had a month to get ready I could live off salads if I knew that I could win $10,000 no I don't relish the idea of going up against Ked or any of the other girls but I do have the advantage of having one twice before wait a minute there's a dark cloud looming over this picture Gavin mallister I can't stomach the idea of him being my landlord seeing him today Unearthed all of the old emotions are there any other Open Spaces in town other than Gavin spot did I really just ask that I guess I am considering opening my own shop it's funny how quickly that idea took root it would be nice to own a business while I enjoyed working under Janine my former boss and owner of the boutique in New York it would be nice to be my own boss to know that the buck stops with me do I have it in me to be a success I would certainly like to try Dad gives me an astute look and I swear he can read my mind maybe it's about time that you and Gavin buried the hatchet not in this life time hi Harum A sly smile slides over Dad's lips what I demand you're still carrying a torch for him my face Flames am not I nearly shout geez can I be any more transparent I really need to develop a better Poker Face mom lights up like a mason jar filled with lightning bugs we'll need to get you a dress shoes and a swimsuit I'm not sure how great I'll look in a swimsuit right now mom studies me with a critical eye there are a few tricks of the trade that we can employ maybe some good Shapers and buttlifting tape for the swimsuit dad cringes I didn't need to hear that this is going to be so much fun mom squeals bringing her hands together yeah I say absently my thoughts going back to the $10,000 for the first time since before the store in Manhattan closed I feel a smidgen of hope all I have to do is parade across the stage and smile and wave I can do that I think Dad Lumbers to his feet let's go I'm starving he looks at me you coming nah I think I'll hang around here and Munch on some lettuce so much for the ice cream and binging on Netflix I guess I'll have to go for a jog instead there's not much hope of me transforming my body in a few days however I can at least try maybe lose a little water weight this earns me an amused smile from Dad it's only for a few days butterbug then we'll celebrate with a big bowl of ice cream amen I boom as Mom stands I hold up a finger oh I almost forgot that date with the podiatrist won't work Mom fixed me up on a blind date I explain when I see dad's puzzled expression he makes a face as he turns to Mom Sable please tell me you didn't she did I insert giving Mom a snarky look it's nice to know that Dad's on my side he rubs his neck we've talked about this I know you mean well hun but you've got to give our girl some space you're smothering her I had to do something to get her mind off Gavin mallister mom mutters defensively ouch that stings yes I'm a miserable sap why can't I just get over Gavin and put the past in the past I'm capable of getting my own date I Thrust out my chin in fact I have a date for tomorrow night mom looks suspicious you do yep with who she asks this is going to be good with McKenzie holder I announc grandly the stricken look on mom's face is comical are you talking about Mac holder the meat counter guy at the Piggly Wiggly it's all I can do to contain my smile yep he's the one have you lost your mind Mom hisses that guy's brains are scrambled he ogal everything that we a skirt he was giving me the eye the other day dad looks at me with concern as much as I hate to admit it your mother's right Mac holder is a meathead mom swats dad's arm what do you mean as much as you hate to admit it what's wrong with agreeing with me oh hun he soothes as he slides an arm around her waist don't get all bent out of shape I was saying that you were right Mom thrusts out her chin fire flashing in her eyes You're darn tooting I Rise to my feet planting myself in a Battle Stance I'm going out with maer at this point I don't care how big of a Cova or Meathead ma holder is this has become a matter of principle battle lines are being drawn here and I'm not budging an inch I shoot my mother a death glare I'm a grown woman and can make my own decisions she's right Dad Cuts in before Mom can launch an argument we have to trust Alban's judgment thank you I snip mom looks like she's about to break into tears I just don't understand she sigh it'll be all right Dad gives me a wink I'm sure Albany knows what she's doing do I know what I'm doing go out with ma holder instead of the podiatrist had seemed like such a good idea earlier but now I'm not so sure and any rate I'm committed and there's no backing out I just hope the date won't be a disaster oh well it's just one night if it's awkward I'll have to grin and bear it after all what's the Worst That Could Happen my face is up here [ __ ] there's not much worse than going to a pizza place the caliber of Life by the slice when you're watching your weight the tender smell of bacon dough tingles my senses my stomach growls hungry for all of the food that I shouldn't be eating I can imagine the satisfying sensation of sinking my teeth into a pepperoni pizza piled high with cheese maybe I'll just have one ensy Little Slice with a salad I'll eat it slowly savoring every bite the conversation between Mac and Me has been stilted and awkward except when I gave Mac free reign to talk about his favorite subject himself Mac is into wrestling and monster truck shows I now know more about Bounty Hunter Scarlet Bandit Nitro Menace and all the other Superstar monster trucks than I ever cared to learn Mac fits the part of a monster truck driver with his bleach spotted denim shirt that's crudely cut out in the arms and the gold necklaces around his neck one thick the other thin he has a diamond stud earring in one ear Cy I feel underdressed in the jewelry department all I'm wearing is a simple pair of gold hoop earrings Mac must be super proud of his biceps because every few minutes he casually flexes his arms when he moves as if to give me a show the worst part about this date is that Mac has a Wandering eye every time a pretty girl walks by he practically turns himself inside out to look at her it's humiliating I clear my throat to pull his attention away from the leggy brunette wearing a pencil skirt clopping noisily on her heels and toting a toddler Mom's right Mac doesn't discriminate he ogal women of all ages regardless of their marital status before the brunette caught his attention there was the 50s something year old blonde and then the teenager bounding past with her short bobbed haircut I should have insisted on meeting Mac here so I would have my car then I could just leave and save myself the pain and suffering I clear my throat to get Max attention what are you thinking of getting he looks at me strangely like I've asked something ridiculous a pizza he reaches for his mug and takes a long Swig of beer watching him tickles My Funny Bone causing me to snigger I can't help but think of a comedy skit by Jeff Foxworthy where he draws in a redneck tone I want a beer and I want to see something naked yep that about sums up Mackenzie holder what kind of pizza I prompt do I really want to ride in a vehicle with Mac after he's downed a few beers I guess I could eat crow and call Dad to come and get me no that won't work he and mom went to the country club to have dinner with Colette's parents Bart and kitty Williams it irks me that my mom is so tight with Colette's Mom where's the Loyalty Mac interrupts my thoughts with three words pepperoni and sausage he speaks as though it's the only piece Pizza on the planet sounds good I'll have a slice of your pizza with a salad a goofy grin topples over Max's lips he leans forward his eyes full of inuendo hey that was some blast you were wearing yesterday he makes a point of looking at my chest I bristle excuse me I will not sit here and endure this humiliation my face is up here [ __ ] I add silently he laughs easily as he pulls his eyes from my chest to my face how do you like being home it's okay the server approaches the table and takes our order just as she's saching away it happens Gavin strolls in through the door my pulse increases as I swallow I notice that he's alone no Colette as he passes by our table he stops surprise blitzing over his features hey my response tumbles out of my mouth hey the dichotomy between Gavin and Mac is staggering Gavin is dressed simply in a Navy t-shirt and jeans he looks tasteful yet casual he's the picture of class compared to Mac my heart hurts and all I can think is that I should be with Gavin Gavin looks at Mack and frowns before motioning with his finger what's this Gavin's disapproval broadcasts over his face as he looks at Mack I can only imagine what Gavin must be thinking that I've lost my mind or that I'm so desperate to go on a date that I'm out with Mac both of those assertions would be correct I was an idiot to go out with Mac holder Dad was right the guy's a meathead we have absolutely nothing in common I'd rather stuff pizza dough in my ears than listen to him drone on about wrestling or monster trucks Mac thrusts out his chest as he catches eyes with Gavin what does it look like man me and my lady are out on a date he throws me a Cavalier smile I want to crawl under the table I'm not your lady I sling back max grin widens that'll soon be rectified once me and you get acquainted after dinner he makes a point of staring at my chest I feel like a grimy piece of meat that does it I hiss as I scoot back my chair and spring to my feet this date is over my face is burning like I'm standing 2 feet away from the Sun what's wrong baby Mac asks with a shocked expression the [ __ ] doesn't even have enough sense to realize what did to offend me I'm not your baby and for the record my face is up here I point to my face not down here I add motioning to my chest I grab my purse and stalk out of the restaurant I have no idea how I'll get home but I'd rather figure that out than spend another minute with Mac holder the cool air feels good against my hot cheeks tears well in my my eyes but I blink them back I steal my jaw refusing to let myself cry I guess I'll have to call Dad and interrupt his and Mom's dinner they'll love that I marched down the sidewalk with the intent to get as far away from ma holder as I can Albany I paus recognizing The Voice everything in me wants to turn around but what good will it do Gavin is engaged to marry another woman not just any woman but my childhood Nemesis I shake my head and keep walking hold up Gavin says as he catches hold of my arm I stop turning to face him what do you want I hurl through gritted teeth he holds up a hand take it easy he juts his thumb back toward the restaurant what was that about were you actually on a date with Mac the incredulousness of his voice Stomps on my last nerve yes I was I stay with all the confidence I can muster is that a crime Amusement swirls in Gavin's eyes yes he chuckled no woman should be put through that especially not you what does he mean by that I search his eyes they're so green that I could get lost in the depths of them how are you getting home I shrug walking I guess it's 5 miles from home it'll take me a while but I'll get there I'd rather walk home than pull dad away from his dinner mom would love nothing more than to rubbing in my face that the date was a disaster I don't think I'll give her the pleasure a lopsided smile tugs at his lips making him look adorable in those shoes I can take them off and go barefoot I'm a country girl he Chuckles I knew she was in there somewhere let me give you a ride he has no idea how tempting it is to take him up on his offer do I dare I straighten my spine my eyes narrowing where's Colette I'm not sure he answers casually so what will it be walking home Barefoot or accepting a ride from an old friend my inside stiffing is that what we are old friends his gaze locks with mine that and much more he murmurs ribbons of heat Ripple through my stomach it's sickening how attracted I am to Gavin for me it has always been him I'm so painfully aware of that fact right now that it makes my head hurt my eyes knck with his time seems to slow I can feel my breath coming in uneven snatches the blood pumping through my veins there's so much I want to tell Gavin like how much I still care I've always cared that's why I poured myself into my job so that I could fill the hole in my heart I want to know why Gavin gave up on us I want to know how he could marry Colette how can he not care about me the way I do about him I guess that's the painful aspect of love the heart chooses who it wants regardless of the circumstance I step back and shake my head thanks for the offer I say dully but I'm better off just walking home I turn and walk away my heeled sandals clipping out a fast Cadence against the sidewalk a very large part of me hopes that he'll call out to me or chase after me but he doesn't it's probably a good thing because if he did come after me I don't know that I would have the strength to turn him away I walk past the shops on Main Street it's not until I turn onto a side street that I allow the tears to fall they flow freely down my face and I don't bother wiping them away it doesn't take long for my sandals to start digging into my feet so I take them off and carry them in one hand i'm sure I'm a spectacle I don't have to look at the passing cars to know that everyone is staring before long the sidewalk will end and I'll be forced to walk along the side of the road for all of my bravado about being a country girl The Souls of my feet are tender I don't relish walking along the gravel edge of the road I guess I'll have to Veer off the shoulder and onto the grass I jerk when a truck pulls alongside me my my heart skips a beat thinking it's Gavin but it's Mac he rolls his window down propping his elbow out this is crazy get in the truck no thanks I keep my gaze fixed into the distance come on babe don't be like that I was just playing around at the pizza joint I whirl around my temper getting the best of me I'd rather face down a pack of wild dogs than get in the truck with you I I see you're a womanizing [ __ ] suit yourself he snear as he squeals off Good Riddance I mutter I walk a few more Paces before another truck pulls up beside me what is it with this town and all the trucks I turn ready to tell the person that I don't need a ride when I realize it's Gavin my heart hammers in my chest he rolls down the window I smile touching his lips here's the way I see it no self-respecting gentleman can turn his back on a woman walking home Barefoot so either you let me give you a ride home or I'll just follow along beside you in the truck your decision I hope that the wind has dried my tears so that Gavin won't realize I've been crying what's your endgame here he frowns what do you mean you broke up with me Gavin my voice hitches as I continue you're engaged to Colette why are you suddenly so concerned about me I've always been concerned about you I grunt well you have a funny way of showing it a horn blares I look behind Gavin and realize that vehicles are piling up behind him you're blocking traffic you need to go on how could I have ever thought that I could start a business and be in such close proximity to Gavin without being with him it wouldn't work it's too painful I need to get my life figured out so that I can move on to other Adventures far away from Comfort Alabama and far away from Gavin he grits his jaw in determination I will as soon as you get in the truck his expression turns pleading please more horns blast get out of the road a man yells come on Gavin urges I glance back at the vehicles fine I Grumble as I climb into the truck I'm not the kiss and run type A dense silence fills the space between us until Gavin Chuckles what I demand shifting to face him my eyes trace the firm line of his jaw everything about Gavin is masculine while Gavin never mentioned any desire to own a hardware store when we dated I'm not surprised at his choice of a profession Gavin always liked to Tinker with cars and build things I'm still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that you went out with Mac holder you and me both I say dryly a choral issues from his throat that was some get up that he was wearing I'm not sure if he was auditioning to be a gang banger or if he was pedling jewelry my lips quiver as I try to hold back my laughter it peels out of me in short bursts that shake my shoulders Gavin could always make me laugh the levity has the magical effect of dissolving the tension between us so how did you end up going out with Mac Gavin asks again I let out a long sigh mom was trying to fix me up with a podiatrist from mobile I wasn't going to have her ruling my life so I opted to go out with Mac instead your stubbornness got you in a pickle he surmises pretty much my stomach growls so loud that I feel like I have a tiger inside me I clutch it embarrassed we' better get you some food it Dawns on me that Gavin had gone into the restaurant to get something to eat but then he'd come after me I'm sure you're hungry too a grin stretches over his lips starving how does the drive-in sound we can get a cheeseburger cheesy fries and strawberry milkshakes Gavin is listing My Favorite Things sure I say indifferently then something occurs to me do you really want to be seen with me at the drive-in that'll cause all sorts of rumors I can can see the headline of Nelly Kinsey's blog now hardware store owner and fiance of Colette Williams reconnects with his old flame over cheeseburgers and milkshakes don't forget the cheesy fries Gavin adds I blink several times not sure what to make of his response so you're truly okay with going to the drive-in he gives me a sidelong glance his eyes sparkling with a challenge are you worried truth be told yeah I'm a little worried I just got back into town and don't want to tarnish my reputation right off the bat especially if I do decide to open a boutique no wait a minute I called that idea or maybe not I don't know what I want to do I'm a bundle of hopeless confusion where's the rebel I know in love I nearly choke on my own saliva did he just say the word love for a man engaged you don't seem overly concerned about Colette I retort you seem awfully concerned about her the comment raises my hackles I couldn't give a flying flip what Colette Williams thinks I spout he doesn't skip a beat good we're going to the drive-in yikes my snake fangled tongue has gotten me in a bind again Gavin knows me too well he knows my weaknesses and how to work them for his benefit he knows my instinct is to come out fighting fake it till you make it he arches an eyebrow his voice taking on the musical Lil of amusement unless you're chicken laughter circles my throat as I wag my finger your goating might have worked when we were in junior high and you wanted me to skip chemistry to make out with you behind the gym but not now you know you want a big fat juicy cheeseburger and some cheesy fries he urges I could eat 10 cheeseburgers right now my traitorous stomach growls again okay I relent but when the tongues start wagging about the two of us Fanning an old flame it's your own dang fault I'm a big boy I can handle it he says as he makes a uturn and drives us back toward town the cheeseburger is delectable worth every calorie I don't want to even think about the pageant this weekend or how I'll look in a swimsuit I just want to eat and relax I catch the interested glances from the people in the car next to us I throw them an annoyed look but they continue to stare why is everybody in comfort so nosy I complain Gavin drapes on a smile before offering a friendly nod and waves to the people in the car those are the Armstrongs Phil's a handyman he's in and out of the hardware store a lot that's his wife Marsha with him well they're certainly getting an eye full I mutter this is where I start missing New York and how everyone Minds their own business speaking of New York are you here to stay or are you going back his question is asked lightly but I can sense the gravity beneath his words I shove the last fry into my mouth before placing the tray in the empty bag do you really care if I go or stay he blinks in Surprise of course I care I've always cared anger explodes through me like a volcano erupting would you stop I hiss his eyes narrow stop what stop acting like you care when I know that's a bunch of malarkey ly huh his eyes danc with laughter it's good to see you getting your southern accent back the wounds inside me spill wide open bleeding poison into my soul if you cared so much then you wouldn't have ended it I fume as I clasp my hands together to stop the trembling he places a hand over mine I Flinch giving him a questioning look his touch is as warm warm as it is thrilling I can picture squiggles of lightning bolts zipping through my skin my eyes seem to have a mind of their own as they drink in his chiseled features up close I noticed faint lines around the edges of his eyes he has a dusting of freckles over his nose they're so faint that I wouldn't have noticed had I not been so close his freckles used to be more prominent his brow is creased with a matureness that wasn't there before Gavin has transformed from a boy to a man this knowledge reminds me of the years that have passed years when we were apart living Separate Lives rolled into my attraction as a sense of loss the hurt is so familiar that it's a part of me imprinted into my DNA Everything feels surreal so many times I've dreamed of being with Gavin again and now I'm here my eyes move to his lips as my breath comes faster would his kisses still consume me as they did before being in Gavin's arms was a heaven that I never wanted to leave a partial smile touches his lips I've missed this I've missed us what are you saying I croak he Chuckles do I have to spell it out for you his hand moves to my cheek his touch is tantalizing as he caresses my skin with the back of his index finger I know I should put Gavin in his place tell him he's a two time in louse for being here with me and yet I'm caught in his spell everything in me yearns for him I want to feel his lips on mine Gavin is my cryptonite the ache to my soul he leans in closer I feel his warm breath on my face my cells are alive with anticipation as I part my lips the instant before our lips touch Knuckles wrap against the window I jerk back startled Gavin rolls down the window two strawberry shakes the teenage boy says in a bored tone then recognition slashes over his face hey Gavin hey Ben the guy frowns when he sees me in the truck who's she he asks in an accusing tone this is Albany Gavin says easily I force a smile hello Ben scows turning his attention back to Gavin does my cousin know that you're out with her hot slimy guilt covers me as my cheeks flame hotter than the asphalt in July I'm a slime bucket no Gavin is the Slime bucket for bringing me here and for making a play for me how much do I owe you Gavin asks ignoring Ben's question 435 Gavin pulls out his wallet and hands Ben a $10 bill keep the change thanks Ben says with a large grin as he takes the money and leaves Gavin hands me my strawberry shake and a straw Fury is scorching such a hot Trail through me that I wonder if I'll burst into a ball of flames I yank the lid off my shake and SOS the ice cream onto Gavin he Yelps as he draws back holding his Shake in the air what was that for for taking me here and making me care about you again his eyes widen you care was that your intent to have me and Colette Chasing After You I grit my teeth as I point a finger in his face let's get one thing straight here buddy I refuse to be the other woman he shakes his head in bewilderment I can't believe you dumped your Shake on me he looks down at his saturated clothes the empty cup is resting in his lap give me that I grab the shake and straw from his hand I tear off the wrapper toss it into the empty bag plunk the straw through the hole in the lid and begin slurping on the milkshake yes I'm drowning my sorrows in ice cream but it tastes good you are unbelievable he opens the door of his truck and gets out as the empty Shake cup falls to the ground he wipes his hands down his T-shirt and jeans to remove the ice cream and me that empty Food Bag will you I do as he requests he leans over pick Pi up the empty Shake cup and throws it into the bag meanwhile I'm sucking down the milkshake with a Vengeance mostly because I can't believe that I actually threw strawberry ice cream all over Gavin he leans in and grabs the unused napkins resting on the console using them to wipe off his clothes luckily the bulk of the ice cream got on Gavin rather than on the cloth seat of his truck still there's a trickle of pain in along the edge of the seat he blots it with a napkin tosses the napkin into the bag and leaves it on the Shelf underneath the midle menu screen before getting back into the truck he turns and gives me a blistering look you haven't changed one bit he fumes well you have I fire back I never pegged you as a two-time he swears under his breath I'm not huh I said I'm not he growls I lower the shake to my lap what do you mean I ask carefully a curious hope springs in my chest as I wait to hear what he's about to say give me that he grabs the shake out of my hand and begins sucking on it hey I protest that's mine he gives me a thin smile actually it's mine he brings the strong to his lips and takes a long swallow just as I thought what it tastes much better than it feels I hiccup a choked laugh as he starts the truck and backs out I look at his clothes remorse stinging me with the Venom of a thousand Hornets questions are percolating in my brain what did you mean about not being a two-time my voice sounds small in my own ears rather than answer and he stares straight ahead one hand on the steering wheel the other hand holding the shake as he sucks the liquid through the straw fine I Grumble don't answer me I fold my arms over my chest and shift away from him to stare out the window several minutes later I'm surprised when he turns into his neighborhood where are we going to my house you didn't think I was going to wear this for the rest of the night did you he reaches for his garage door opener and clicks it as he pulls in my mouth goes drier than a tub of cotton balls it feels intensely intimate to be going into a garage with Gavin somehow I managed to find my voice I guess I assumed that you would take me home and that would be the end of it he turns off the engine and angles to face me an enigmatic smile pushes over his lips oh no feather don't you're not getting off the hook that easily you and I are going to finish our conversation at a loss for words I just shake my head he gets out comes around and opens the door his chivalry makes me feel even more guilty for the milkshake episode a part of me wants to apologize but then I remind myself that it's too soon for that I need to hear Gavin's explanation first if he is engaged to Colette then throwing a milkshake on him with small potatoes in comparison to him making a move on me he places his hand on the small of my back as he leads me up the steps that go to the kitchen Gavin's closeness is intoxicating our eyes meet sending an inferno of heat whooshing through me all rational thought flies out the window and I can't resist the temptation any longer I fling my arms around Gavin's neck can stand on my tiptoes as I pull his face down to mine all I want is one kiss for Old Times Sake then I'll somehow summon the strength to let him go my lips nuzzle his with featherl persuasion swirling delicious Sensations around my spine his arms encircle my waist as he pulls me to him I press my body against his wet shirt and jeans as my hands slide into his hair our lips meat in an explosion of fire as we kiss long and hard I've wanted this for so long the real thing is even better than the Daydreams he deepens the kiss sending me soaring into Euphoria when we pull apart we're both breathing hard ever so slowly a quirky grin tugs at his lips we've still got it he brags I giggle in surprise that's all you can think to say right now I Nestle my finger around a lock of his hair I've missed you as soon as the words leave my mouth I regret saying them hurt batters my insides you hurt me I can feel tears coming on as I blink rapidly to stay them regret simmers in his eyes turning them to dull coins of Mossy green I know I jerk not sure if I heard him correctly you know he nods but you said at the grocery store that you wanted to give me space my back is resting against the kitchen counter he cradles his arms around mine I got cold feet I was scared I forced Your Hand by claiming that I wanted to give you space and you broke up with me his haunted expression calls to the wounded part of me this time I can't stop tears from pooling in my eyes I'm sorry that I hurt you he says tenderly losing you is the biggest mistake of my life his admission startles me is he really saying these words or am I only imagining this whole scenario because I want him so badly what I shake my head why didn't you come after me he gives me a sad smile how could I you were living your dream in New York my home is here in Comfort I could never ask you to give up your career for me so you were just going to marry Colette I was never going to marry Colette my head starts to spin but she said said y'all were engaged Colette proposed to me but I turned her down it happened several weeks before you came home I'm happy relieved and outraged at the same time why didn't you tell me I sputter a cheeky grin fills his face and miss out on seeing you seething with jealousy no way could I turn down that opportunity laughter tickles my throat you are a menace I wasn't jealous I blust her oh yes you were jealous I've got the remains of the strawberry shake to prove it okay I was a little jealous I admit and then scrunched my eyebrows I can't believe Colette put on that whole charade about the dress and you taking her to Maui on your honeymoon it's Gavin's turn to be surprised what I Never Told Colette I'd take her to Maui that's our spot I know I assert heartily Colette was Goen me about Maui digging in the knife so I jabbed her with the pen well it sounds like Colette got what she deserves I still can't believe you dated her he heaves out a heavy sigh she's persistent and I caved his eyes search mine now that you know the truth where does that leave us will you stick around this time or head back to New York a smile tips my lips and I feel deliriously happy you know I'm thinking about sticking around for a while maybe open a boutique I heard through the grapevine that there might be a spot opening up beside the dance studio on Main Street would you happen to know the owner his eyes sparkle with the zest of the stars as a broad grin fills his face I might know a guy there's only one little kink in my plan weariness settles over his features what's that I need to win the beauty pageant this weekend so I can get the $10,000 prize for seed money he gulps out a startled laugh are you serious yeah do you not think I have a chance I'm a little miffed by his reaction of course you already won it twice I know I'm hoping that works in my favor if money's the issue then don't worry about that I can give you the $10,000 I roll my eyes I'm not a charity case it's good to know that Gavin is so successful while I appreciate his offer I need to do this on my own let's face it if push came to shove dad would give me the money but that's beside the point he laughs down girl I'm only trying trying to help I know I CU his jaw with my hand stroking my thumb over his skin we've been apart for years living separate lives and just like that you're willing to give me the money to start my business he doesn't bad and I of course I'm dumbfounded we can't just pick right back up where we left off laughter streaks through his eyes I beg to differ remember how you reacted when I asked you to the school dance in the seventh grade you approached me in the cafeteria embarrassed me in front of my friends we were in junior high I wrinkled my nose I was supposed to hate boys I couldn't let any of my friends know that I had a huge crush on you and what did you do I roll my eyes you already know the answer I know he hums I just like you hearing you say it fine I huff I'll say it I did the only thing I could to say face I dumped my plate of spaghetti on you he gives me a Checkmate smile his eyes rain in laughter case in point he steps back and motions to his clothes the more things change the more they stay the same he gives me an astute look I didn't see you throw beer on on Mac even when he was being a bozo H Gavin's right no because he wasn't worth the effort his eyes sparkle with Amusement glad to know I made the cut you're always worth the effort I chime it's time to make amends I make a face I'm sorry about the milkshake if I had known that you weren't engaged I wouldn't have gotten so upset I hold up a finger but you did bring that on yourself I guess so PNE laughs it was worth it to get you going I had to know if you still cared well now you know I give him a playful shove in the chest and can't help but notice how cut his muscles are it's on the tip of my tongue to tell him how amazing he looks but I'd better not show all my cards on our first night back together are we back together I sure hope so I'm going to go and change clothes and then we can dig into that Pine of chunky monkey my jaw drops you still have it of course I was saving it for just the right occasion I give him a speculative look tell me the truth did you spot me in the grocery store and then make a beeline over to the ice cream section to grab the last pint of chunky monkey he makes a zipping motion over his lips his eyes popping with Mischief aha you did mellow laughter floats from his throat this is what I love the banter that flows so effortlessly between us maybe we can pick back up where we left off in many ways we already are that kiss was something okay if we're having a confessional I may have been walking by the pizza place and I might have seen you sitting at the table with Mac his admission gives me great pleasure I'm glad you saved me uh my feet from that long Dreadful walk home I'm here for you he Winks a second later he clucks his tongue you are something to be reckoned with in the matter of a week you stabbed Colette with a pin and showed everyone your latest fashion trend with the bow on the bra hanging out of your shirt my face flamed that was an accident my seat belt must have unbuttoned my blouse he continues you entered a beauty Pion and got back together with your old boyfriend he gives me an appraising look you certainly don't let any grass grow under your feet my eyes widen are we back together a crooked grin pulls at his lips you bet you he pauses unless you're one of those who likes to kiss and run a giggle rises in my throat that's just it I've never been the type to kiss and run my heart is so light right now that it feels like it could fly up to the heavens I can hardly believe that Gavin and I are back together as for the beauty pageant you can thank my medin mother for signing me up I wouldn't be too hard on your mother after all she's the reason we're back together my jaw drops a mile huh it's true he lets out a long breath a few weeks ago sa came traing into the hardware store and announced that you were moving back home she pinned me with one of her Steely looks and said don't you think it's about time you stop dinking around and tell Aly how you feel about her what I sputter mom did that H how did she know how you feel about me that's what I asked you know what she said I shake my head Sable came back with because I've got eyes that's why you need to stop moping around and looking so down in the mouth oh and you need to stop dating all the wrong women and go after Albany I told Sable that I would do just that if I thought you cared he grins I might have said something about how ridiculously stubborn you are and that if I did make a play for you you'd probably throw it right back in my face Sable agreed and said not to worry about that saying she'd take care of everything a disbelieving laugh rises in my throat mom played me she knew I would be ticked about altering Colette's wedding dress my mind works to assemble the pieces was Kitty Williams in on the charade and Colette I can't imagine that they would be no I don't think so I'm sure that Colette and her mom dreamed up that scheme about the weding dress to drive a wedge between you and me kitty and Colette thought they were playing me and using my mother to do it but Mom was playing them I shake my head in admiration her grins stretching over my lips I haven't given my mom enough credit I chuckle she's a crafty one even just wait until I get home tonight wait a minute don't go home and call Sable out on the carpet if you do she'll know that I ratted her out that's true I think of something else if I play dumb then I'll have the upper hand Gavin Smiles in relief that's the ticket a wicked idea circles my brain I could pretend that my date with Mac went splendidly well Mom will croak Gavin's brow creases nah that's a terrible idea why he gathers me into his arms because the only person laying claim to you is me he utters as his lips take mine the beauty pageant the High School auditorium is packed to the brim I stand off to the side of the stage and look out over the sea of people I spot Gavin in the center three rows back from the front Dad is sitting beside him my stomach churns and I feel like I need to puke mom touches my arm are you okay why did I let you talk me into this why I growl ball in my fists take it easy mom warns you've got this I feel like a fat blob I look down at my swimsuit remember in my nightmare about being naked by my locker this is almost as bad I have to go out and parade in front of an auditorium full of people no not just people even worse people that I grew up with people that I know tears rushed to my eyes did you see how good Colette and strawberry linger felt looking their swimsuit I whisper they are definitely the ones to beat mom grabs my arm her expression one of gritty determination those other girls only wished they had curves like you she lifts her chin her eyes flashing fire Colette's got nothing on you a pleased smile curves her lips you got Gavin thanks to you Mom blinks in surprise I know I said I wasn't going to call Mom on the carpet but I can't resist the temptation I'm on to you I know you used reverse psychology with the alterations thing my voice goes syrupy you laid it on thick with all that driil about how you just don't understand me of course I understand you Mom Chuckles you're my daughter I know you better than you know yourself emotion wells in my chest thanks for the nudge I guess I needed it more than I realized I give her a tender smile you're all right moisture fills her eyes you're all right too her voice hitches I love you I love you too my mom and I look at one another with a new understanding it occurs to me that maybe I do have the right mother for me after all out of the corner of my ey I I catch sight of the MC striding out on stage to begin the pageant you've got this mom assures me go out there and show them what Albany Jane featherstone's made of I would tell you to make me proud but it's too late for that I'm already proud this time I'm the one whose eyes go moist thanks the music starts and I see the contestants lining up I straighten my spine and suck in my stomach it's showtime I say mostly to myself as I drape on my beauty pageant smile an hour later my feet are killing me in these heels and I feel like my mouth is about to crack off my face from smiling so much I have to keep reminding myself to maintain good posture even though a dart of pain is shooting between my shoulder blades I'm fortunate to have made it into the top three final S no surprise I'm in the lineup with Colette and strawberry lingerfelt swarms of butterflies Circle my stomach as I wait for the MC to announce the winner the $10,000 prize has never felt so close or so far away I look out into the crowd as Gavin catches my eye the look of adoration on his handsome face makes my heart swell he Grins and gives me me a thumbs up regardless of what happens on this stage I realize with a jolt that I've already won The Greatest Prize of all a chance to start over with the man of my dreams the MC clears his throat the second runner up is Albany Jane Featherstone I feel a whoosh of disappointment as I hitch up my smile and glide across the stage to accept the bundle of roses and crown that are presented to me I didn't win the $10,000 now what I guess I'll have to come up with an alternate plan the first runner up is CED Williams the host booms and the winner is strawberry lingerfelt as strawberry is crowned and takes her walk across the stage crying and waving at the audience that shoots me a smug look I guess I won this round actually strawberry won I point out but when it comes to what truly matters I'm the real winner I make a point of looking out at the audience and catching eyes with Gavin I can almost feel the steam coming out of Colette's ears I feel a little guilty for the jab just a smidgen guilty after the pageant is over over Mom approaches me fuming this is all Nelly Kinsey's fault if it weren't for her stupid blog and all that talk about you being a relationship wrecker I know the judges would have picked you spoken like a true mother I laughed maybe what mom says is true maybe not strawberry lingerfelt is a beauty with her man of red hair and perfect figure I feel like I came out okay he taking third place especially considering my lack of preparation I guess I'll have to come up with a new plan since I didn't win the prize money mom's eyes light up no need for that I've already come up with an alternate plan uh-oh there's no telling what Mom has up her sleeve I'm almost afraid to ask what is it a bright smile overtakes her face you and I are going to open up a boutique together as partners my eyes bug what I shake my head um I don't see how that would work the two of us would kill each other nah we'll be fine mom Chuckles the way I see it is that you have a great eye for clothing styles and design but you're a bit of a blunt instrument when it comes to dealing with people you need me to buff out the rough R edges I know how to navigate the kitty Williams of the Town her eyes sparkle also think of the business I can send our way as president of the Lake Pines Women's Club I'll think about it I say knowing that Mom will eventually talk me into it after I change clothes and gather my things Gavin and dad meet us outside in the parking lot you did great Gavin says as he infolds me in a hug and kisses me on the lips thank you I breathe relieved that the pageant is over I especially liked the swimsuit part he murmurs you look like a million bucks my insides go soft as I smile my phone buzzes you'd better answer that Mom says it's been buzzing like crazy for the past hour someone's desperate to get in touch with you I pull it from my purse it's Janine my former boss hello I answer finally Janine exclaims I've been trying to reach you for hours what's up you're not going to believe this she squeals but I just got funding by some new investors to open a store in Manhattan I want you to come back and run it for me my mind spins as I look at Gavin mom and dad all three of them are watching me that's good news I say to Janine good it's great we're in the driver's seat these new investors are in it for the long haul they love what we did with the other store and want us to create the same model I'm kind of in the middle of something I hedge can I call you back later there's a slight pause sure you will take the job right I can't do it without you I'll certainly give it some thought I say neutrally as I end the call Gavin gives me a search and look give what some thought dad touches my arm what's going on butterbug Janine got funding to open a new store in Manhattan she wants me to run it I look at Gavin and see the distress on his face his jaw tenses as his features go Stone hard what are you going to do he asks a dry laugh leaves my throat I don't know I answer this is so unexpected Gavin gives me a long look I guess that's that he mutters as he shakes his head and stalks away are you just going to let him walk away mom asks frustration simmering in her voice I rub my hand across my forehead I don't no I say as I turn to look at Gavin my eyes trace the outline of his defiant shoulders I can tell from his stiff gate that he's wounded angry the feeling of loss that sweeps over me is a Relentless tidal wave that's determined to pull me under look at him I Bluster storming off like an idiot and not even giving me a chance to process my thoughts dad puts a hand on my shoulder offering me a tender smile butterbug what are you doing you and I both know that no store is worth losing the love of your life go after him just like that everything becomes clear it's time to stop chasing the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and start appreciating the beauty of the rainbow itself huh dad asks dubiously never mind no time to explain I take off sprinting Gavin mallister I yell he stops and turns around yeah he sulks a smile plays over my lips you getting cold feed already he grunts not hardly you're the one who's kissing and running I Bridge the distance between us and throw my arms around his neck you are the most most frustrating man I know Amusement lights his eyes does this mean that you're staying his expression is as hopeful as it is vulnerable I realize just how much Gavin cares and it warms me to the center I Square my jaw you'd better believe I'm staying it's like I told you before I'm not the kiss and run type a low chuckle rumbles in his throat as his arms encircle my waist good to know he murmurs as he captures my lips with his come in home has never felt so right this has been cold feet good girls don't come last written by Jennifer Youngblood narrated by Lori West copyright 2021 by Jennifer Youngblood production copyright right by Jennifer Youngblood