Browse Transcripts

Category: Entertainment

They're eating the dogs the people that came in they're eating the cats they're eating they're eating the pets of the people that live there and this is what's happening in our country Read more

Category: Comedy

In springfield they're eating the dogs the people that came in they're eating the cats they're eating the pets of the people that live there they're eating dogs and cats and hamsters i saw it on tv they took my dog cooked it barbecue i saw it they ate lassie rentin tin they've eaten benji they've eaten... Read more

Category: Entertainment

I don't give a of camal harrison aloh hol because i'm still gonna root for that because i was never a i'm trump guy i'm a never trump guy i'm a never trump guy i'm a never trump Read more

Category: People & Blogs

Tonight on unsolved mysteries in the peaceful town of springfield ohio an unsettling mystery has surfaced reports have emerged of a group of haans in the community consuming cats an act that has both baffled what could drive this bizarre behavior in a town known for its tranquility is it an isolated... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Get out of my sandwich no Read more

Category: People & Blogs

Will she allow abortion in the eighth month ninth month seventh month come on okay would you do that why don't you ask her that question why don't you the because under ro way you could do abortions in the seventh month the eighth month the 9th month and probably after birth just look at the governor... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Thank you, everybody. come on now. please have a seat. thanks, everybody. have a seat. you're very kind. thank you, chicago. welcome, in here, out there, all around chicagoland. welcome to "the late show." i'm your host, stephen colbert. [cheering] we are live after the epic night four of the democratic... Read more

Category: News & Politics

If i could make an arrangement where i had a a stand in a front man or front woman and and they had an earpiece in and i was just in my basement then i could sort of deliver the lines but somebody else was uh doing all the talking and ceremony i i'd be fine with it earrings were merely a fashion statement... Read more

Category: Comedy

Here are the top 10 reasons why you hate donald trump number 10 the hair it's like a cotton candy experiment gone horribly wrong number nine twitter fingers he tweets more than a caffeinated parrot number eight the wall spoiler it's not in game of thrones number seven kif we still don't know what it... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Welcome to the late show i'm your host steven colar ladies and [music] gentlemen l and gentlemen this country is still a buzz about tuesday's night debate when kla harris shook donald trump's hand then handed him his ass it was it was i got to say it was uh it was fun to watch it was fun to watch instructive... Read more

Category: Sports

A lot lots of different things really played with suarez he never went in a treatment room played on with energies used to get kicked all over the pitch he'd have bruises all over the place but he'd be robust and available for every game not so for me jamie carragher very robust mentally strong tough... Read more

Category: Sports

[music] i'm always [music] but it's hard because i'm falling i'm [music] but it's all because [music] foreign [music] [music] remember seeing a similar twist [music] [music] [applause] and gabriel jesus had to put that one away [music] [music] and roof has fouled the goalkeeper kimuru saying he didn't... Read more

Category: Entertainment

बेटा वो मम्मी ने घर प करेले की सब्जी बनाई है यार तू थोड़ा तेरे साइड से बोल ना कि बाहर खाना खाने जाते है ओके मम्मी और पापा कह रहे थे कि उनको घर का खाना पसंद नहीं और उनको बाहर खाना खाने जाना है पाटी बदल लिया साला अरे तूने बोला था हेल्प करेगा बता ना वो थर्ड का फोर्थ क्या है द आंसर इ माइटो ज्रिया पाटी बदल लिया साला कल से छ अंडे बॉयल चिकन प्रोटीन शेक ओट मील्स एंड ग्रीन वेजिटेबल ओली ओके ठीक है डन खत्म पाटी बदल लिया दिन में एक बार चलता है रे Read more

Category: People & Blogs

Joe rogan podcast check it out the joe rogan experience train by day joe rogan podcast by night all day gentlemen we still don't have a name for this we're not the cucks right we got rid of what was wrong with the cups protect your neck i think protect your neck is best that's the best one yeah let's... Read more

Category: Comedy

Let's get into it i just want to let you guys know i'm going to have a meltdown may i have a meltdown in this episode of the jre that is how this gentleman right here starts the conversation so i'm just going to show you that clip really quick just cuz i thought it was funny but then we're going to... Read more

Category: Sports

Intro cj it's a pleasure to speak to you um let's start by talking about these new jerseys and obviously last season we saw the introduction of the the white throwback we saw it in prime time i was there actually for that game against kansas city at metlife when you guys were wearing it you come out... Read more

Category: Comedy

Our next guest is a member of the proud van patton family dynasty new episodes of our show tell me live stream wednesdays on hulu please welcome grace van [applause] patton i'm sure people drive you crazy talking about this all the time especially people of my age but it's a to me like dick van patton... Read more

Category: Entertainment

>> stephen: hey, we are back with the star of "our town" soon to open at the v barrymore theater. mr. jim parsons. who is the stage manager to you? he's not a character but he has a character. >> jim: i think it's thornton wilder, i think it is the author speaking as much as say tom in "a glass menagerie"... Read more

Category: Entertainment

>> stephen: welcome back, everybody! ladies and gentlemen, my first guest is a four-time emmy award-winning actor you know from playing sheldon cooper on cbs's "the big bang theory." he now returns to broadway in the new revival of thornton wilder's "our town." please welcome back to "the late show,"... Read more

Category: Comedy

-welcome back to the show. everything good? -pretty good. -yeah, yeah. things are going pretty well. -yeah. pretty good. -oh, i wanted to ask you quickly about this. i heard this, uh, story. i don't know if it's true or not, and if it's not true, we can cut it out of the show. -okay. -but did you audition... Read more